My ex holds my hand, kisses me but doesn't say he wants me back?

[Anonymous]

I love my ex still dearly. We were together for a year and a half. We had a mutual break up and it was very calm. I lived with him so I moved out. It's been a month now. Since the break up we talk off and on about what's going on in our lives. He doesn't say that he wants to get back together but I'm dying to. About two weeks ago we slept together. I told him I can't do this with him because I still love him too much and it hurts. He said he had mixed feelings about sleeping with me. It was great and hard for him as well. I tried to keep my distance since I didn't know where he stood about it. Since then he's been hanging out with my family because they were always close. Last weekend our paths crossed. Along with my family and friends we all hung out that night. He held my hand on the way home. Now it's been days later. I have to go through something tomorrow. He said he wished he could be there for me but he can't because of work.

I just don't know what to make of all this. It's hard not to talk to him because he still talks and hangs out with my family. It's hard to not see him because I have things at his home that I just don't have a place for yet. I want him back but I just don't know what to do. I also don't know how he's feeling and how to get him to tell me. I've asked him but it doesn't seem to go anywhere. Whenever we see each other, it is a constant struggle to not kiss him and just throw myself at him. I don't know if he feels the same, but I think that he does.

Should I move on, tell him how I feel, or ignore him in hopes of getting him back?

[Broken_InSide]

don't let him use u. it's obviously that he doesn't want any commitment to u.

my ex did exactly the same things to me, he knew that I still had feelings for him so he manipulated me and I ended up very hurt.

u have to end it now. and move on.

link

[kimberlymyra]

Make a clean break or get back together. This situation will only end up hurting you. Don't allow him to hang out with your family, that's just asking for trouble. He shouldn't get hte benefits of a girlfriend without committing ;)

[ImSoSozzled]

I would try to move on if I were you. He could be sincere but I think he just likes knowing that he can have you back anytime he wants. Just tell him you can't do this anymore so if he doesn't want to try to work things out, yall need to stop talking.

[Asker]

So, I should pretty much lay down the law and ask if he wants to be with me or not. I'm not ready to get back with him just yet but I will be eventually. I'm pretty sure he isn't either. He wants us to both get our lives straight then see where we are at. I just don't want to be in limbo not knowing whether to move on or not. I would like to just date him and not live together. I just don't know how to say this to him.

[ImSoSozzled]

To be honest, I feel like the best thing you should do is just end it.

"but I will be eventually. I'm pretty sure he isn't either. He wants us to both get our lives straight then see where we are at."

You're definitely just saying that to make yourself feel better. I know you don't want to see it but he is manipulating you. The best thing you can do is move on and hope he realizes what he gave up. then hopefully he will come back to you and yall can try to work it out.

[Asker]

Thanks, I'll try. Ugh it's so hard. Every time I fight to make the decision to move on or not it feels like we broke up all over again. Thanks again for your help. Eventually it will get better. I hope...

[ImSoSozzled]

It will =) Time heals all. Once it's over, you'll find someone else and be so glad you did it. good luck!

[Terabellum]

No way should you move on. The biggest mistake EVER. When two people have feelings for each other moving on is the most pointless thing they can attempt to do. Keep hanging out with him, try to make it more often and see what happens.

[Asker]

If I don't try to move on, I feel constant heartbreak when we kiss or hold hands(which has only happened a few times since the break up). Every time it happens and we don't get back together, I'm dying inside. I don't to keep putting myself in this situation even if it feels so right for both of us at the time. I know when we talk he is sincere and still really cares which is what makes this so confusing.