If Women Really Aren't "Visual," It's A Huge Disappointment for Guys

[ADFSDF1996]

I've recently heard about a "theory" that states women aren't visual when it comes to attraction. I don't know if I'm the only guy that got sad and disappointed when I heard about this. Surely I hope it's not true, I hope women are actually visual when it comes to attraction. The possibility that women aren't visual can be one of the biggest disappointments us men can have. I'm sure that some of you remember my first take https://www.girlsaskguys.com/sexual-behavior/a27952-women-view-men-exactly-the-way-men-view-women well I'm not sure if it's true, hopefully women are visual.

Most guys aren't aware of this theory, most guys assume that women find men attractive just by their physical attractiveness. You see a lot of guys dressing nicely to impress women, a lot of guys thinking they are handsome and have other physical attributes but the question is, do women actually find random men physically attractive? It's hard to say because I'm a straight man, however I'm currently worrying that women don't get turned on by the sight of random men. I hope women do get turned on by random men but I'm not so sure they do.

When a beautiful woman walks into a restaurant, all the guys will look at her and say to themselves "wow! She's so beautiful/hot!" Now if a handsome man walks into a restaurant, women won't react the same way or even get those feelings. They won't even look at him. It's unfortunate but that's what I've noticed.

It's seems that the only women that are visual are lesbians or bisexual women when they check out women. I'm not trying to offend anyone but that's what I've noticed. However straight women tend to only be visual when checking out other women as well. I always notice women smacking each other's butts, complimenting each other on their looks and saying that women are more attractive than men, specifically when it comes to aesthetics, yet they insist that they are straight. I haven't noticed any woman compliment a guy on his looks yet.

Women seem to be extremely hostile towards men, even the male equivalent of Gisele Bündchen would get a dirty look from a woman just because the man decided to compliment her. This is one of the reasons why I haven't complimented a woman yet. Even if a woman receives a glance from a man, it can result in the woman screaming "pervert!". It doesn't seem to matter how attractive the man is.

We've all seen pictures of male models who are partially clothed in public places. I am starting to think that they are pointless. I have yet to see women even paying attention to them. Over at the malls, I always see guys looking at Victoria's Secret models. Yet women don't give the same attention to the Hollister male models. A lot of people Shame guys that look at female models by calling them "thirsty", "pigs" or "weirdos". I feel sorry for those male models.

Sadly I've noticed women seem to care more about what men can do with their bodies more than what men's bodies look like. At least that's what a lot of women tell me. Us straight guys admire the way a woman's body and face looks but women don't seem to really admire men's bodies. They only look at our bodies as a piece or at, it's unfortunate. In other words, they probably only look at us in the same way us straight guys look at other guys.

I feel sorry for those guys that date women that don't even find them physically attractive. I would never date a woman that doesn't find me physically attractive, to me that's deceiving and cruel. I would break up with a woman that only likes me for my personality and or my talents. I want my girlfriend to like me for everything. A lot of guys unknowingly date women that don't even find the guy attractive, how can they feel loved? I've heard the far fetched claim that after being with a person for a awhile, they start to look physically attractive. I don't believe that at all! I don't consider liking someone for non physical reasons attraction.

When it comes to sex, all people say is how women always like to be submissive. The women always expect the man to be dominant. Women like to be touched everywhere but don't return the favor, because women probably don't find men attractive, so why would they want to touch a man during sex? Apparently women like to hear a man's voice during sex for some reason. I've never had sex but that's all I hear about when people discuss sex.

In order to try understand how women react to visuals, I looked at the comments on some artworks on Deviantart involving models. As I expected the comments on the female models were mostly from men saying how sexy, gorgeous and hot the female model is, some were even from women also complimenting the female models. On the male models, most of the comments were from gay men saying how sexy, gorgeous, hot the male models are along with some non PG remarks. I wasn't surprised by these comments. There were very few comments from women regarding the male models but they only said "amazing", "I like the lighting of the picture", "He's in good shape". Clearly the women don't really care about the male models. It's as if they are looking at a fabric instead of men.

In my opinion faces should be the main source of attraction. It seems that women only focus on certain facial features, like the jawline. While us guys focus on the entire face and get feelings of attraction when we look at a woman's face. I am guessing women don't get those same feelings. Which is obviously unfortunate, I think women only look at men's faces in the same way a man looks at a bicep.

I've noticed women say they get turned on by hearing a guy sing, watching a guy dance and a guy's scent. I don't understand that at all. I hope those kind of things aren't the only things that turn women on. I mean sure I like to hear women sing and if they use some perfume but it's not really a big deal.

Everyone says "looks fade", well I disagree. As someone gets older, the group of people they find attractive level with their age. For example a 20 year old person like me likes women that are 18 or 19 years old. A person that's 40 years old will find people within their age group attractive, I've even noticed elderly people finding each other attractive, specifically men finding women attractive.

I know that eventually I'll end up getting married and having kids but in the meantime I worry about women's true feelings about men. Maybe this theory about women not being visual when it comes to attraction is just misandrist propaganda meant to demoralize men. I just don't know how women view men, I can only guess based on observations. I hope women are visual.

[jadexo]

I'll just go through your points one at a time. This is clearly quite distressing for you, but I can understand that. I'm also worried about attraction in a relationship - but I'm worried because 'physically attractive' is something I definitely want in a relationship.

1. "do women actually find random men physically attractive?"

Women do find random men physically attractive. If I see a random hot guy in public, I'll take notice of him and will be attracted to him. As in, I would probably be interested in getting to know him because his physical appearance matches my standards for a romantic or sexual partner.

2. Women checking out/commenting on men's appearances

Believe me, women do notice and talk about it if a hot guy walks into a restaurant - as a man, you won't notice this because you've never been in a group of all girls. And as for checking men out - women are subtle. Some men tend to gawk. Us girls give quick glances.

3. "Even the male equivalent of Gisele Bündchen would get a dirty look from a woman just because the man decided to compliment her"

Eh, this isn't true at all. Girls would happily accept a compliment from a hot guy - but if a girl gives you a dirty look just for complimenting her,, regardless of your attractiveness, she's not worth your time anyway.

4. "Women don't give the same attention to the Hollister male models" & a man's body & sexual submission

The thing is, the vast majority of Hollister models are complete butterfaces. As are most male models. Don't worry about women's attraction to male models - the people casting don't necessarily want a facially attractive man.

We do check out good bodies though - on attractive men - and I look at those bodies in a sexual manner. As for sexual submission - nah, women do want to touch men in sex. I don't know where this misconception of yours came from but it's not true.

5. DA comments

Like I said, women are subtle. Women do find those models attractive, they just don't comment on it.

6. Facial features

Nope, not true. I focus on the whole face. When women talk about jawlines, they mean a good jawline on a man who's already attractive. Not just a good jawline on any ugly guy. Women do find men's faces as a whole attractive just as you say you find women's faces attractive. And as for seeing a hot guy like just artwork or something - it's just not true.

I'm running out of characters.

The majority of your concerns are just misconceptions. Just chill.

[ADFSDF1996]

Thank you so much. I appreciate the time you took to be very detailed. That gives me tears of joy. Now I understand everything.

[jadexo]

Yes :D I got through to you :D if you have any other questions about this whole thing, I'll be happy to answer them for you

[ADFSDF1996]

Thank you.

[ADFSDF1996]

I think you might have missed the one that discusses about women that check out other women🙂.

[America1st]

Women are absolutely visual. They look at your eyes, teeth, smile and whatever else is meaningful to them. I've never been with a woman that didn't enjoy eye candy just like a man. My ex-wife used to point out great looking women to me. I used to ask her if she found certain men attractive. We had a great relationship in that respect. Please don't bother asking me why are we divorced. Life isn't just about one thing in a marrage. Why people think women are so different in "every way" from men is silly at best.

[yoshi_wanna_ask]

Thanks for being so descriptive with your question, it's an interesting topic to flesh out. While I'm sure the article is trying to stir up controversy what is true is that women aren't AS visual as men. MOST of the time a woman will look towards a guys personality, character and interests as her main measure but approach him/like him if he looks a certain way that's attractive to her.

To a woman care and feeling secure/confident (I don't just mean money) are two of the most important things in a long term relationship. So if the guy looks stunning but won't communicate or make space in his lifestyle for her, it might not be long until he's single. As for the compliments, women have it suggested to them A LOT as we grow up (especially by the media) that any attraction they feel or opinion they have about, well any of this, makes 'dirty', 'slutty' or 'nasty', when often it's just human/curiosity. So it can be difficult to give or receive those kind of compliments.

Women DEFINITELY are attracted to men physically but if you feel hearing that is something important to you, you may have to give your lady a bit of time to get used to it and let her know you love hearing it. You seem like someone who pours a lot of effort into looking after yourself and I'm sure she'll appreciate that. But remember, for her, because thoughtfulness is very attractive, a surprise candlelit dinner with her favourite food and some good music goes a long way too.

[ADFSDF1996]

I wrote this take because i'm starting to doubt women actually find random men physically attractive. I just women only appreciate how a man's body and face looks in a artistic point of view, similar to how us straight guys can acknowledge if a guy is handsome. In other words I'm starting to think women look at men in the same way us straight guys look at men.

[yoshi_wanna_ask]

Being a fan of Markiplier, and a woman, I can assure you that's not true *^_^* :p (You can google him if you don't know who he is) We just, experience things differently :)

[ADFSDF1996]

So can women find men physically attractive (like the way his body and face looks) disregarding personality?

[yoshi_wanna_ask]

It's definitely possible... but it's more probably not for any more than a short fling. Not because she would find him less attractive, but because women want to *share* a relationship together with their partner and to do that, they need to get along with them. It's not the be all and end all but being attractive would certainly give a guy a higher chance of getting a girl in the first place. Being funny and witty is definitely a plus though.

[ADFSDF1996]

So women can find random men physically attractive without knowing them?

[yoshi_wanna_ask]

Short answer, yes. If you're still unsure, maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to make some friends who are girls. Or join a fandom. That'd give you a chance to get to know some of us a bit better.

[ADFSDF1996]

I think I understand now, thanks for the advice.

[MissFabulous]

I disagree women are visual :) They can find random guys attractive. If a women sees a man on the street or out and about somewhere and she thinks he's cute or handsome, she will look at him. As far as male models on pictures out in public, we girls do look at them lol I always glance at those pictures of hot guys. ;) As a teenager I sometimes use to go into Hollister to see the cute guys that worked there at the time haha. I mean, those advertising pictures of hot/sexy models is the tool that sells those underwear or items of clothing cuz sex sells, so people notice and will buy.

Also, I like when guys compliment girls as long as it's not creepy like "hey baby like those legs can't wait to wrap those around me tonight". Overall, women are visual and do pay attension more than you think. :) I think men & women are very similar, they both can be physically attracted to each other, and both are turned on by the same things. Also, Women can be turned on by different things, not just physical attraction. However, eveyone has their own preference on what they find attractive or not. :)

[gypsygoddess]

I think you're getting confused between attraction and being turned on. I look at that guy getting out of the bus in the sun, or those lifeguards (although that may be a little bias because I am a lifeguard) and I think to myself yum, I kinda just want to put my hands on that body (it makes my job a little harder) but that is as far as my mind goes i. e. I'm not thinking of him like boyfriend material. It's more of just general appreciation. < This is attraction. To be turned on I need more than just looks, I need the mind and soul. Most women need their brains turned on before the body can be turned on. Think of it like a key, for men visual attraction is a key that opens one room and in that room is body. For women the attraction key opens the room with mind in it, within this room is another room for body - if mind is not turned on first no key will be produced for body. Speaking from experience - You can be hotter than Zac Efron but if you're as dull as a sack of bricks, there's no way you're getting in my pants.

[Justin201]

and this is why girls make zero sense.

[Lightspeed-Lemon]

Welcome to reality. : P Women to some extent appreciate a good-looking man. Some guys have proven this by using fake pics on dating sites to gauge the difference in female interest. They would get lots more responses and find that convos would go much better when girls believed they were chatting with "Chad Thundercock", a tattooed rebel who plays baseball and runs a body shop.

That said, will women actually pay money to look at male bodies? Are women's magazines filled with sexy men? Do advertisers use hot guys when marketing to women? With some exceptions, the answer is usually NO. If women were as visual as men, you wouldn't even need to wonder about it. You'd just look at society and see all the strip clubs catering to women, and women's magazines filled with posters of guys, and it would be obvious.

Your reaction is like that of older alpha women who put all their energy into their professional careers. At first they expect men to be attracted to their accomplishments, power and status -- since that's exactly what women find attractive in men. Then to their dismay, they discover men don't care squat about those things. Some are even turned off by them. This would come as a huge bummer to a woman who doesn't have much in the looks department but who runs her own company and owns two homes. I know a friend of the family who's CEO of a large corporation but is still single into her 60s. Male and female brains simply operate differently, and what attracts one gender won't necessarily work for another. For women, good looks in a man are one ingredient of many but it's not at the top of their list.

[Errhh]

this is wayyy too long to ready but i'll say this

WE ARE VISUAL!!

just because we are not as visual as men, it doesn't mean we aren't at all... it's rather dumb to think otherwise!! of course we love how things look!! we have eyes!! and we must like what we are looking at... however you must stimulate our minds and our ears MORE than our eyes if you want to win over someone's heart and such... we love the way people make us FEEL rather than what we see, but that doesn't mean we don't care at all of what we are seeing.. we do care!! and some of us more than others!! LOOKS MATTER but it's not all that matters...

[Errhh]

not ready!! too long to READ!!!

autocorrect is my worst enemy i wanna kill it. :o!

[ADFSDF1996]

I've heard that women only look at men in the same way us straight men look at other men.

[Errhh]

that's just stupid. and more stupid if you believe it.

if you have an awesome body and or extremely handsome... it doesn't mean all girls will automatically fall in love with you.. there's MORE to it BUT it doesn't mean we don't like what we are looking at... on the contrary... we are hoping that THAT handsome stud is not taken or not as stupid or dumb as the rest of most of you are :p! :D! etc.. etc... eye candy is eye candy no matter who you are!! we just don't fall in love with someone solely bases on how good your body is and such.

[ADFSDF1996]

I'm not talking about love, I'm just referring to attraction. I think you should read my whole take in order to understand what I mean.

[Errhh]

I don't need to read all that bs.

We ARE visual. Everyone is! The fact that most men are MORE visual than the average girl, does not mean that girls are not visual. It's dumb to even think that.

[arineunha]

I dont know if its just be but i dont think all women in general are like that, maybe some of the ones you know were like that. When i see an attractive guy i will take glances at his face and i have a cush on him. Men are also beautiful creatures, I like to stare at their bodies. Maybe its creepy but idc.

I started at my boyfriend at a party because I found him attractive and he stared at me right back. I'd say we're both goodlooking and we conpliment each other. Also, its very hard for a guy to stay in a long term relationship with a girl they dont find attractive. My boyfriend and a few other guys vroke yp with certain girls because theys werent attractive to them; i dont blame them because attraction is also an important factor on dating their condition. I know girls also want o date someone who's attractive

Biological speakng if you're attractive and you have a symmetrical face. It means you have better genes because you have no deformity with your face.

:)

[ADFSDF1996]

When you see a guy you like, do you really feel attraction or do you just appreciate his looks in the same way us straight guys acknowledge another guy has good looks.

[arineunha]

I feel attraction like tbe one where your eye lights up and your heart beats faster

[ADFSDF1996]

I understand now, thanks for sharing an opinion.

[Shorty1991]

Jean Claude Van Damme it! I don't care what anyone says, we women are also visual creatures just not as visual as men are. But we don't just base it on looks like most men do when we are looking for something serious. Not much different to guys perpectives. Just have a good personality to top it off. Also, we want you to know that there's more to us than just out looks. I wouldn't want some guy choosing me just because he thinks I look cute/beautiful or sexy. I want him to love me because I'm caring and understanding with a good sense of humour, I can be serious when required but I like to act silly and goof around. But most guys just go for the looks, get used or get into relationships just to end up sorely disappointed when they discover that the girl isn't that great a catch after all. We do it the other way around, because we don't want to be messed around.

[ADFSDF1996]

What does it mean "not as visual", I've heard that a lot.

[Shorty1991]

Ok, meaning that for both parties physical attraction has to play a part for any genuine relationship to work. Men place more importance in looks than women do. Women focus on personality and compatibility more than looks. I've seen plenty of attractive guys and I haven't dated them, because I will not just go out with someone that looks the part. I've been on dates with average looking guys. Sadly they were quite boring and not on the same wavelength as me.

[ADFSDF1996]

Do you think women look at guys in the same way us straight guys look at other guys?

[Shorty1991]

Lol. No. Because a straight guy wouldn't show the same kind of interest in other guys than what women do. What I mean by that is just a friendly interest and not a romantic one.

[ADFSDF1996]

Now I understand, thanks for sharing an opinion.

[Shorty1991]

Your welcome.

[Bobbyhill1]

you are spouting pseudo science. Women, are just as visual as a men. This notion of women not being visual was started by a sexist feminist who wanted to make out men to be nothing but a bunch of horny dogs who are not capable of emotional love. this notion is quite idiotic and sickening and on top of all of that its false. there are many tests on this and the reactive time on females are just as strong as a males. the test that were taken before hand had actually included false variables such as wide age groups, pictures that some men/women will not find attractive etc.. In a more recent study women were provided erotic images that are seen as attractive in society. Before having time for emotional responses caused by a womens thought process the females brain lit up just as quick as a males would. There is no indication of a certain sex being more horny nor more visual. Its time to drop this false study and move on.

[Shorty1991]

@Bobbyhill1 I knew that someone would pipe up and disagree with me but that's Ok. For the record, I'm not "spouting pseudo science" its how I work. I have known plenty of attractive men but their personalities and characters weren't up to much. They were the kind that thought they were gods gift to women. I have dated more average looking guys through online dating, because I seemed to get on better with them at first. Until it came to meeting them. They turned out to be only after one thing and they werent on the same wave length as me. Yes I did say that women are visual creatures but not as visual as men. Meaning that their has to be some physical attraction on both parts. But women base it more on personality and compatibility if they are looking for something serious. Some men are the same. I don't speak for everyone obviously but I'm going by my experience and what would be suitable for me. But I agree with you their, I should have said that both genders can be just as bad for

[Shorty1991]

@Bobbyhill1 rushing into relationships and then wanting to split up a few weeks or months down the line. So what I'm trying to say is that there's got to be a balance between physical attraction , personality and compatibility. I'm not putting it down to gender roles. So. Sorry if it came across like that. No one wants to go out with someone just because they look good, with bad character and a shitty personality. At the same time not many people would go out with someone that they are not physically attracted to.

[Bobbyhill1]

no I have no problem with what you are saying on having balance that is the honest truth. if you aren't attracted to someone then you just cannot go any further thats the brutal truth. Now, What I did have a problem with was ''women being less visual'' when this was nothing but a tactic to insult men. People take offense to things like that and specifically when these things aren't true. also about your example with hot guys? Hot girls do the SAME exact thing. NONE of this is a male or female problem. Women and men are just as visual AND emotional. Men have to hide their emotions due to society. Look up the depression rate for middle aged men. when you say things like ''men are visual creatures'' you are implying inferiority and I dont stand for that.

[Bobbyhill1]

we feel like any other women can feel. We aren't just some visual sex hungry beast. the statement you got your claim from implies that by the way.

[Shorty1991]

@Bobbyhill1 if you read my reply properly, I clearly stated that I wasn't directing it to all men or women. I'm not trying to insult men. But I've obviously offended you. If I was directing it all towards you, I would understand why you would have found it offensive. But yes, the balance between personality, compatibility and physical attraction is important. Or else it all ends in tears. You also get people who will overlook any of those 3 factors, out of fear of being alone for the rest of their lives. When they get into relationships like this. They are living a lie, just to break that persons heart. Pretending to be happy with that person when they aren't. They end up becoming infatuated with people they find attractive, more compatible with them. So the cold hard truth it we are all shallow to a certain extent. No balance, no love. I used to be less visual than I am now because those guys I went on dates with were not my taste looks wise. But I still gave them a chance.

[Anonymous]

Yeah I have never been turned on by the sign of a random man. I have been able to assertain if a random man was probably my type by movements and mannerisms which made me interested in him and caused me to find him very attractive... but occasionally your wrong and once they open there mouth your like... "NO, that's gone!!". lol.

Smell is an important one. My husband smells incredible!! he doesn't wear cologne or any type of sprays either... it's just him... mmmm mm mmmm. He gets stopped like everywhere we go with woman trying to figure out what he is wearing-lol.

[ADFSDF1996]

So, you don't care how he looks?

[Opinion Owner]

My Husband is incredibly attractive. The more I get to know him and love him the more attractive he gets too... doesn't hurt that time is super nice to him... gorg & like I said the smell makes him even more attractive... whenever I smell anything like him all I can think abotu is how hott he is and how I want to just be engulfed in that smell! He is my everything :D.

[ADFSDF1996]

Did you find him physically attractive (like the way he looks) at first sight?

[Opinion Owner]

I was 18months old when I first met him so I'm guessing probably not but I thought he was cool growing up. I thought everything about him was cool and hot for awhile when I was about 12 and then again at 14 and then again at 16 which is when we started dating-lol. He was a good looking guy but like I said I've always known him. My only other super serious boyfriend I have also known my whole life and he has a lot in common with my husband, in fact we are still good friends with him. But like I said I've also known him my whole life. I dated a few

Like I said I've been attracted to guys I didn't know before but I noticed a trend later... they were all alike at least in some compacity. They usually had pretty similar mannerisms and movements that's what lead me to believe that that is what I am actually seeing when I find someone attractive. I definitely have a type albeit hard to come by type -lol. But I can also see when someone is by the book attractive just not my type.

[Opinion Owner]

I also don't get turned on by getting touched all over... that always seemed like it was more for the guy then me. I can do without having my chest sucked on or my boobs fondled... that's something he generally likes and I can be okay with at least for a bit then I hop on top and take over when I reach my done point. I also don't like when he goes down town either. Everyone is different and likes different things. Where do you feel a man doesn't get touched enough?

[ADFSDF1996]

The fact that women need to know me personally before being "physically attracted" to them indicates that perhaps women don't really find men attractive.

[ADFSDF1996]

*Know men

[Opinion Owner]

Or maybe there are differences between men and women besides just body parts. Just because men don't get attracted that way doesn't mean it's not attraction. Yeah there are a lot of things about guys that I wished was more like girls in relationships too when I first started dating but it's the differences that really make a relationship bloom. Men and woman get to the same places we just take different routes to get there and that's good... would you want to date a guy with boobs and a vag? Probably not.

[ADFSDF1996]

I'm kind of disappointed, I' always thought that women found men physically attractive in the same way us straight guys find women physically attractive. It's disappointing that women seem to only care about personality, or that infamous emotional connection.

[Opinion Owner]

I do find my husband to be incredibly sexy. He is always the hottest person in the room :D

[ADFSDF1996]

Isn't that because you know him personally?

[Opinion Owner]

It's because he is sexy as shyt. He is literally the most gorgeous man on the face of the planet and I count my blessing every day that he is with me and finds me worthy :D

[ADFSDF1996]

You said you never were turned on by a random guy, how about physical attraction to a random guy?

[Opinion Owner]

Sexually attracted? No, strangers don't do it for me. I've been interested to get to know someone better by how he looks - how he stands or holds himself, how his lips move when he talks, what he does with his hands. If he carries himself in a way that interests me then I start to feel more and more desire for him. Once I get to know him and what makes him tick and start to see what an incredible person he is I want to show him how incredible he is and how much I want him. Why would I feel the need to show a stranger that? How would looks be enough to want to show that?

[Opinion Owner]

Just because my sexual attraction may work different then yours doesn't make my wrong and yours right, or yours wrong and my right. For all I know it's the same and we just think of it differently because our brain works differently. Perception is a funny thing sometimes.

[ADFSDF1996]

Yes that's what I'm refer to, not sexual attraction.

[ADFSDF1996]

*reffering

[Opinion Owner]

Not sexual attraction? Yeah girls can like the way a guy looks... like I said it boils down to how he stands, how is mouth moves when he talks, how he holds himself, what he does with his arms, if he makes eye contact, his stride... that all effects his looks and pretty much determines if I am attracted to him and want to get to know him better or not.

[ADFSDF1996]

Can you find a random man's face attractive?

[Opinion Owner]

If his body is telling me what I want it to generally his face is too... it's hard to have your face be sending a different message esp. when your unawhere. I don't like uptight faces... doesn't know how to describe but you can usually pick them out. I hate guys that make faces instead of speaking up. I find it super unattractive. Don't find people who get easily offended attractive in the slightest.

I don't care if you have a big nose, color of your eyes or hair, haircut or hairless, bushy or light eyebrows, a soft or hard face. I like when someones eyes show emotion and when they have pretty decent (but not blandly perfect) teeth, but yeah really it comes down to facial expressions, eye contact, how you speak even more so then what you say as far as faces go.

[ADFSDF1996]

So you don't really care how a man's looks?

[ADFSDF1996]

*face

[Opinion Owner]

I do... I really really care. just about different attributes then you do.

[Opinion Owner]

A guy can act the way I want him to but if he doesn't show it through his face and movements I'm figuring it's show and not really how he is so I am just not attracted even if he does all the right things other wise. Face and body are important. It's harder to fake... at least consistently.

[ADFSDF1996]

Now I understand what you mean, thanks for replying.

[paxamor]

... So. The fact that a woman is willing to overlook someone not being drop-dead handsome because his personality is great is /offensive/? What the hell? Most women would rather a man like them for their personality, intelligence, and talents than for their looks, though certainly all of the above are ideal. But to say you would break up with a woman who likes you for who you are on the inside just because she doesn't find you hot on the outside is definitely strange to me.

[ADFSDF1996]

What I meant is that I want her to like me for everything, I know that I have to like a woman for everything for me to like her.

[paxamor]

Mind you, that's not to say we don't value physical attraction, because we certainly do. If two men with good personalities came up to me and one was hotter than the other, of course that's who I'd go with. But if a gorgeous man with a trashy personality and an average man with a great personality came up to me, I'd go with the latter.

[ADFSDF1996]

Same here but for me I still think average looking women are attractive.

[paxamor]

Of course that's ideal. But you make it sound like, by your standards, only hot men and hot women should get dated and everyone else can go screw themselves no matter how good their personality is because they're not physically attractive.

[paxamor]

Also I can tell you that women definitely check random men out. We're just a lot less obvious about it. Men actually have a naturally narrower field of peripheral vision than women, so while men are usually obvious about it, a woman can usually check a man out without even turning her head.

[ADFSDF1996]

They say "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", I agree because for some people one person might be unattractive but for other people that person is the most attractive person they've ever seen. So I don't know if anyone is actually "unattractive". If you ever see a attractive person with a unattractive person, perhaps the attractive person sees that unattractive person as the most stunning person ever. I don't have a problem with who dates who though.

[paxamor]

I guess I just don't see why having a woman like you enough to overlook not being gorgeous in her eyes is offensive enough to men to have them break up with her.

[_piotr]

It is not strange at all. I was in such relationship and it was very unpleasant for me that my girlfriend would not find me visually attractive. It depends on person, but for me it is a deal breaker.

[Relentless_Hippie]

I don't know what kind of women you've encountered but men are the most gorgeous creatures to ever walk the face of the earth especially manly men. Not those pretty girly looking kind of guys either. Just masculine looking men, and no he doesn't have to be muscular he just needs to look like a MAN <3

I personally don't understand why men find women attractive. I think women are disgusting. As much as men admire whatever beauty they see in women is as much as I admire the handsomeness of men. <3

[XRabbitHeartX]

Just because women often require a emotional connection with a guy doesn't make her non visual. Women just need a connection emotionally in many cases and women can absolutely find men as a "turn on". We just struggle to sometimes find a penis or abs hot on its own as we want to know we actually have a spark for the guy that its on, if that makes sense. I get very turned on by my boyfriend and can find myself getting butterflies just by looking at him. Even from our first date I could feel things and attraction physically. Why do you think some women end up falling for hot guys but who they have nothing in common with or no compatibility with too? Doesn't that kinda prove women are visual as well.

[ADFSDF1996]

You only get turned on by your boyfriend because you know him. I doubt you would even feel attraction to a random man. So that's why I am starting to doubt women are visual. I want my future girlfriend to like me for how I look as well not just because she has a emotional connection.

[ADFSDF1996]

Do you at least find random men physically attractive?

[XRabbitHeartX]

Yeah because I totally KNEW my boyfriend before I even met him and on my first date i just knew everything there is to know by default. -.-

[NJ_Casanova]

It's not the looks.. it's the size of his wallet that matters$$$$$ ;-P

weknowmemes.com/.../this-man-must-be-very-rich.jpg

[ADFSDF1996]

That makes sense.

[Nuala]

I don't know about most girls, but I'm "visual". I mean if I'm thinking of dating a guy personality is the biggest factor that gose into it, I can't date a guy with a annoying personality. But if a guy has a great personality and is kinda ehh on the looks I would still date him.
But just because of that doesn't mean I don't check out guys. I won't sit and gawk at someone, but I do notice if someone's above average looking.
I really don't get why some girls get upset when a guy checks them out, I mean if the guys following her around that's a whole other thing... but when a guy checks me out I don't go:
"Omg, did that guy just check me out? What a PERV!"
I go:
"Omg, did that guy just check me out? I must be looking FINE! 😎"

But that's just me I can't speak for anyone else.

[Rocket_Queen]

Okay so I sorta just did a quick breeze through this on my lunch break. For me, and only speaking for me:

It's not that I don't appreciate an attractive man. I can give a quick look and say "attractive or nope" and keep moving without ever missing a beat. If the same attractive man walked up to me and did a strip tease I still would probably not be turned on. Now if the same man or even a man less attractive came up to me and initiated an interesting conversation and we just clicked, I could be turned on and fighting my desire to push him against a wall.

So it's not that we (I) don't find him attractive physically, it's that his physical looks will not turn me on. Where I think a hot woman could walk into a room and strip for a (not all) guy and he is ready to hit that without her ever saying a word. I'm turned on by your abs and penis, but open up to me and that's where the sexy magic happens.

[ADFSDF1996]

That's exactly what I mean by not visual.

[Rocket_Queen]

Well what I was trying to say is that I am visual, yes. As in I can appreciate a handsome man, but as far as turned on, it takes more.

[ADFSDF1996]

So you only look at guys as they are piece of art? Also turn on can mean various things, which one are you referring to?

[ADFSDF1996]

Do you at least find random men physically attractive?

[Rocket_Queen]

Well now, as someone who appreciates art, it is deeper than a "attractive or nope".😜 But for what you're saying, yeah I guess. As in the fact that he is attractive only isn't going to leave me in a soaking wet puddle and have me picturing the dirty things we could do.

[Rocket_Queen]

Of course I find some randoms attractive, but turned on from looks, no.

[ADFSDF1996]

Do you look at men in the same way us straight guys look at other guys? In the same way a straight man can acknowledge another man's good looks. If that's the case, I don't think it's actually attraction.

[Rocket_Queen]

Not at all. I think what we are talking about is 2 different things: finding a man physically attractive vs being turned on by only his physical appearance. Those 2 don't have to go hand in hand.

[ADFSDF1996]

I think I understand, thanks for sharing an opinion.

[Rocket_Queen]

Yep = )

[ADFSDF1996]

Did you read my whole take?

[feminismisnarcissism]

yep, straight women "ogle" because they are competitive with other women... dudes just don't really do that except maybe with cars. it's a cultural thing. women objectify themselves and each other AND men-thus why men are concerned about their cars and taught BY women to see women as objects to some degree. one of the fallacies of feminism; the objectification is rooted with women, not men.

straight women also OGLE playgirls, etc. I've seen them do it, but on the street etc. when checking out other women (which they check out more than men)-they're noticing the shoes, the top, the purse, the hair style, the makeup, etc... such to compete, to add to a wishlist, etc.

[Smmyskittles]

Whoa, this isn't true.

You clearly haven't seen my previous comments about the large muscular men at my gym. <3 Especially at night, they're everywhere.

That will lead to sex.. but I need a dude I can connect with. If that means he's not a '10', couldn't care less.

[Truthatanycost]

Especially at night? WHAT? It sounds like you've been stalking large muscular men at the gym at night. Do you use night vision goggles? How much did they cost anyway?

That will lead to sex? Very naughty.

[Smmyskittles]

@Truthatanycost - Cute troll attempt. :P

Just a few times where I've slept in for some reason and gone the same night to get in my workout. That's how I know.

[Chadette]

Attraction has to be there for anyone. Some people just aren't super shallow that go for one specific typical hot person, since attractiveness is also subjective to each individual. Do you have the "modeL" looks, but that's not necessarily what every single woman likes. I like guys that sometimes have a unique face, like Adrien Brody or Adam Driver as well as those guys that look like Chris Hemsworth or Morris Chestnut.

There is variety; it can be a combination of an attractive face and hot body, or a very handsome face and a decent body. But I want something more than just physical. I want someone that can make me laugh, be there through highs and lows in life, share ideas, and such. They need to have the whole package of at least decent looks but a good personality for me. Personality is what keeps a woman. I would never stick around a super hot guy that treats me poorly.

[TheSpartan]

No offense, but Adam Driver is literally the ugliest person I've seen in my life. I literally felt bad for him when I saw his face in the theater.

[Chadette]

@TheSpartan That's your opinion. I don't think he is ugly. He isn't conventionally attractive either. Something about him intrigues me, and makes me like him.

[TheSpartan]

That's something I don't think I'm capable of understanding.

To be honest, a lot of it had to do with me just hating the movie as a whole.

[ADFSDF1996]

Do you only find them attractive rice because they are famous?

[Chadette]

@TheSpartan I suppose you mean the Star Wars movie. I saw him on a tv show first, that's how I know him.

[Chadette]

Nope. One of my ex boyfriends look kind of like them - bigger/longer nose, black hair, skinny but toned, silly grin. Just something different about how they look that I like.

[ADFSDF1996]

I don't know why my reply says "rice", sometimes autocorrect angers me.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Here's the thing: women are visual but we aren't dominantly visual - for the most part. We can look at someone and find them attractive, but we aren't going to be driven into intrigue just by looks alone. Emotional connection intensifies what's already there and it just makes you more attractive.

For me personally I can find a guy really attractive, but that doesn't mean I'd hop into bed with him, or even into going out with him if I didn't have good vibes from his personality. Being hot doesn't fix being a shithead.

[Bandit74]

I think women are less visual in the sense that it takes higher quality visuals to get a reaction out of them and that they aren't as sensitive to them as men are it is wrong to say they aren't visual at all.

They aren't turned on by average men in tight clothes the same way guys are to average girls in skimpy clothes nor are they turned on by dick picks the same way guys are by tit or pussy pics. They are only visually turned on by the most desirable guys. So if they were to see a male model or professional athlete walking around shirtless or in tight clothes they would definitely take notice. For all the other guys they pretty much only like them for their personality but they aren't really turned on by them visually/physically.

[ADFSDF1996]

I think they only like those professional athletes because of their fame. I often wonder why girls even date a guy only for personality.

[Bandit74]

Well thats a factor too but I believe they genuinely like their bodies too.

[victoriameliegray]

We do pay more attention to hot guys in the beginning, just like guys pay more attention to hot girls. But say if I was looking for an actual relationship, sure, a cute guy would be nice, but the main point would have to be that he needs to be kind and can make me laugh. Women are also visual. They just also like men with a good personality, because that counts a lot.