The One Question Every Woman Hates that is More Important than Any Other

[Apope16]

This is such a revealing question! Ask early on!

Darius says, "You as a man are a business. Your time is not to be played with...you want to deal with only quality people...Women have been getting away with for far to long just bringing sex and that is it."

How do you know that the woman you are talking to is a quality woman? Ask this one question to find out based on how she reacts and answers:

"What can you offer me that another woman can't?"

Before I came across this video today I actually asked this question to women and was shocked by the response. Most women when I have asked this question get defense and angry. Their initial reply usually is, "What is it that you have to offer as a man?"

This is something that I have noticed from most women. They are so insecure with expressing their own opinions and beliefs that if you ask them a question they will respond back with the same question. You guys ever notice that? It is insecure. It is WEAK. When someone asks me a question I give my answer and I dont give a shit what the person asking me thinks. It is what I truly believe. And if you disagree I will respectfully listen and you might change my mind. But it is strength to have beliefs and values and principles.

Another way that women respond to this question is they unmatch you online or they refuse to reply and simply ignore you. Once again. These are women who are insecure. Have no sense of their own self worth or value. Or maybe they know their qualities but they are worried if the guy will like them.

The last type of female response is my FAVORITE. A woman MAY actually tell you what she can offer. These are the type of women that are sooooo sexy. They are not insecure. They know what qualities they have as a woman. They are introspective rather than narcissistic. They might actually give you fun tidbits about them-self like they can cook or burb for three mins or have a great blowjob or maybe they can talk about poetry or sing.

[MrOracle]

Men have ALWAYS been judged on what they bring to the relationship - and that has generally varied widely, based on his career and ambition, etc., but women were mostly expected to bring to the relationship: child-bearing, child-raising, managing the home, and providing comfort for her husband (which typically included cooking), who was out earning a living and supporting the family financially. This wasn't ALWAYS the case, but it was usually the case.

Feminism saw women go to work outside the home as the norm, and also to pursue advanced educations in order to work outside the home, so the other traditional things that women used to bring to the table were largely abandoned, and women who chose to continue the traditional housewife role were often berated, blamed, and shunned as "gender traitors."

The problem is: men didn't get into relationships and get married because they wanted someone else to pay the bills, they got into relationships and got married because they wanted to start families and have their children raised with their values. And so what happens is men either aren't interested in a career woman, because he wants a wife to have children with, or, the men who ARE interested in career women are interested in them because the man would rather be lazy, stay home, and play video games all day. Women also have never been less happy with their lives, and have never been more lonely.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/may/18/womens-rights-happiness-wellbeing-gender-gap

Who would have thought that working outside the home was difficult and stressful? Shockingly, women find it exhausting to commute to jobs, to deal with office politics, have a constant list of deliverables, and to be in constant competition with other workers (something men have always had to deal with, and get little sympathy for). Of course, great pains are taken to blame men for this, but it turns out that no amount of "equality" can make men bear children, nor are men as well equipped to raise them, at least in their early years.

But when women are asked what they bring to the table, and they say "I have a degree and a career", most men aren't particularly moved. They often have those things already, and even if some don't have a degree, they may still have a lucrative job in construction or as a mechanic or some similar job where they make decent or even very good money. What they're looking for is not another earner - it's a wife and children. And with fewer women interested in that - and constantly being told NOT to be interested in that by other women - is it a surprise that men are less and less interested in relationships and marriage? Or that women are less and less happy with their lives?

Makes you wonder.

[I-am-a-nobody]

@MrOracle
"What they're looking for is not another earner - it's a wife and children."
So well put! So sad that women are trying to prove themselves in every way but as a wife and mother. Too bad i can only give you 1 thumbs up!

[Unit1]

I'm gonna be that odd one out, who feels absolutely unmoved when women say they bring "housewife performance and homemaking and raising kids" to the table and much more moved if women tell me "I have a masters degree and a career and I love to travel".

[I-am-a-nobody]

@Unit1
That's the big difference in our generations.
We're more family oriented.

So, if she has a masters, she'll probably want to work for 10 years before having kids OR she might not want to even bear kids. So, you'll travel the world, but not have the joys of a family. OR if you have one, you might do the nanny thing, where the nanny is practically a surrogate mother.

I married the girl who wanted a family. I wouldn't trade it for 10 trips around the world. However, I hear you. Your generation would rather see the world. For me there's no place like home.

[Unit1]

@I-am-a-nobody pretty much. I can't care less about having a family. Being childfree suits me perfect. I did hear however how the economy was very stable before the year 2000. Times change and so Priorities change too. We're in this mess of poverty threats and we adapt. Can't blame us for it.

[I-am-a-nobody]

@Unit1
If people had kids in the depression, why not now?
It was lousy in the late 70s early 80s, then around 1991 and the Gulf War, then in was 9/11, then...
There's always some crisis. to be honest, what I do matters more than what the economy does.
I wish you well!

[Unit1]

@I-am-a-nobody i can see your point. Thanks!

[CubsterShura]

A lot of men actually WANT women with higher education or career, so a woman is technically not wrong for mentioning that this is what she has to offer.

[zagor]

@I-am-a-nobody Uh, as I understand it the 60's and 70's were a big time for hitchhiking around the US and Europe, and exploring the world, for young people. What you are talking about sounds more like the 1950's.

[shaysh87]

Does it really matter that men want housewives if vast majority of them cannot afford housewives?

The men who don't want their wives to be earners tend to come from the mid west or rural areas of the US. But if you go to NYC, LA, bigger modern cities with a younger population, you will find most men prefer women with a decent education and job. Its a cultural difference.

[Shamalien]

Lol if u ask a woman what she can offer and she talks about great blowjobs... newsflash that is probs not a quality woman, she learned that shit sucking strange cock. I want a girl who’s been doing something other than sucking dick her whole life. If she says “a unique perspective, empathy, compassion, amazing food” thats the shit I want

[hellionthesagereborn]

Well the reason why they get defensive is because they where raised their entire life to not HAVE TO PROVIDE SOMETHING. They are told and raised to believe that a expecting a woman to cook and clean is sexist (it is not sexist however to expect a man to be a provider and protector because "reasons"). They are told that a woman shouldn't have to be nurturing and in fact this is a bad thing.

So what do they have to offer beyond sex? Well women who believe this (and many do because they have had it force fed into their brains since grades school by both our "education" system and the media) don't have anything TO offer. They expect the man to be traditionally male, so a man isn't going to need a woman who tries to act traditionaly male (as she can only provide less then what he is able to provide (a woman can never be more than a second rate man, a man no more then a second rate woman, but a man can be a first rate man and a woman a first rate woman)), and with no other skills or expectations placed on them (as women have actively fought against responsibility and expectations for over a century now), they have only sex to offer (and many women have given that away so many times that even that isn't valuable anymore).

This is why men need to step up and not try and wife up these types of women or get into relationships with them. I mean women would never date a man who doesn't have the capacity to provide and protect, why are we as men so desperate for attention and sex that we would sell ourselves for a woman that treats us like a commodity (this can be proven with the simple fact that women expect men to pay for dates despite claiming to be equals. When you ask them why, they will say to pay for their time I. e. their time is more important then YOUR time by simple fact that they have a vagina and you don't. Clearly they don't think highly of men and why a man would tolerate that in a prospective mate is beyond me). Men need to step up and not tolerate this, if enough men demand something of value beyond sex from women (just as women do for men), they will be forced to improve themselves and actually be better people which is better for every one.

[sdtabot]

Most women would be defensive because it is a very demeaning question. It is a question that most men who thinks women can only give sex would ask.

What kind of woman are you meeting? Decent women have jobs too and can support themselves financially. They don't even have to rely on you for anything. Then, asking them what they can offer when they don't even ask you is like looking down at them because you felt the need to ask instead of seeing it for yourself. They're not only there for sex. But most men make women feel that their sole purpose in a relationship is to provide sexual pleasure. Most men I encountered here would even say that if you want emotional support or love, you should give sexual pleasure. It is very demeaning.

Women, like men, can provide financial and emotional support. They are people who have talents and skills.

Asking someone, women or men, what they can give makes you look like an employer - someone who doesn't really give a shit about the person as long as they can serve a purpose.

[Apope16]

Young professional women. A woman is so used to making a man qualify himself to her that she never has to ask herself what she brings to the table. So a woman that isn't playing games and is truly interested in you? she will answer. Its a great conversation starter too. She might say something funny like she can stand on her head or some talent. Or she might be serious and say she is compassionate. It really is more of an ice breaker. "Oh. So you are compassionate? That's really cool. Is that a quality that you like in a guy too? Tell me about how you are compassionate?" Then that makes her feel good because she sees you really are into her in a deep and meaningful way rather than just pussy.

[sdtabot]

The last time I answered that kind of question, the guy just ridiculed my answer.

[AlienParasite]

This question is absurd and kind of entitled. I'll explain why:

1. It's absurd because there's nothing you can offer than nobody else in the entire world can't offer. Everybody can be replaced. Even if they say "I can cook" "I earn a lot of money" "I like poetry" "I give good blowjobs", there are many women that can do that in this world, and so they aren't offering something another woman couldn't.

2. It sounds entitled because it sounds like "Tell me quickly you qualities, so I don't have to lose precious time meeting you, when I could be using it for other girl".

Honestly, this questions gives a bad impression. I thin the intention isn't that bad, but the wording is terrible. There are friendlier ways to ask this question like "what skills you have you are most proud of" or "what would you say are your best qualities". I think girls' answers would be more positive if the question was worded like this.

[Shuri]

To be honest, if you asked me this question flat out, I wouldn't see you again because it tells me you are a selfish person that's only looking for what you can take, not what you can give. Relationships are supposed to be about both and building each other up in a loving manner.

The truth is that every person has the potential to offer their potential partner something that someone else can't. That's actually the WRONG question to be asking because anyone can lie, and, honestly, you sound like a conceited dickhead when you ask that, male or female. Seriously, what can I bring to you? Excuse me, but what can you bring to ME? This is something everyone should be searching for when dating. And you don't ever just 'ask'. You get to know them and see for yourself.

The entire point of dating is to see what you can add to a person and what you receive from a person and determine if this is even a person that is worth your time. Asking this question won't do anything for anyone. Every relationship in some capacity is give and take, even abusive and negligent ones. You have to decide who is worth your time and who is not and determine for yourself if this is the person you are meant to be with.

Seriously, that's a really stupid question.

[Gotcha_Writer10]

Is it bad that while this guy is clearly some type of misogynistic poop, asking that question isn't actually that bad. I mean, it allows the person themselves to really look themselves and ask themselves what they really do provide in a relationship. For instance, the question isn't necessarily pervy or bad. Nor do the answers have to be. If asked, I'd first emphasize loyalty. In my principle of being mongoamous and being so that the person im with will never need to worry about infidelity with me, and if push comes to shove, if I'm unsatified in the relationship, ill just end things if things aren't working. As well as my interest in traveling and ttying new things, thus ensuring time well spent with eachother going different places and expereincing fun new memories with eachother. The lost can go on. And like he would ask me, I'd ask him. Like, why is this question bad? I mean sure under the context it can be bad if he isn't willing to provide an answer to the question too, but I'd have fun answering it.

This also reminds me of an article i found regardging important questions a girl should ask her man while on a date. And if i rember, it was something along the lines of "What are your intnetions of pursuing a relationship with me?"
So i kind of get similar vibes from this question. For as abrasive as this questions may be, they cut to the point and ask the big questions between your partner that can detail the expectations between one another, and if things dont add between eachother, at least you learn things earlier instead of years later.

[MzAsh]

It’s a fair question. I’ve written articles begging the same question and was bombarded with mgtow hate and vitriol but that’s another story.

But this guy’s gotta quit kidding himself about men not needing sex as well as the value of a man vs the value of a woman. We know how men act when they aren’t getting what they want.

A woman more often than not is going to have a greater abundance of options than the man in regards to both sex and commitment.

And I advise all women to command commitment *before* sex. Men qualify themselves to a woman first, then she reciprocates value.

But I’d also advise women to prepare a kick ass, authentic answer to the question and want him want to work for everything she’s about and brings to the table.

[Apope16]

THe only reason guys would give you a thumb down is because you used the phrase "mgtow hate". its like mgtow bros get triggered rather than consider what you are saying at face value. all good points.

[Yads_Is_Back]

@MzAsh So well said

[spuitkaas]

I think they're insecure if they actually answer that question tbh. I'm not going to prove myself to someone I don't even know. Truth is I can't offer something else that other women can't, except my personality, but then you can still like other personalities more tbh. Same with men. You really think you can offer things other men can't except for your personality? It's a stupid question.
Also you don't have to quote Darius bc it's not like he seems like he has anything valuable to say. Rather listen to someone who actually has knowledge and studied dating and relationships between people.

[lightbulb27]

Exactly, I see this as a question to lower her value so he can just take advantage of her. I'd never ask that question, eventhough it cuts through a lot of fluff.. remember... "words are like swords". One can argue women are the "weaker vessel", many are emotionally as their emotions waver. If they don't have good fathers who build self worth/esteem, then some will take advantage of that weakness and easily cut them down. This question does that. makes them feel lower, and then they can use them as they wish... and probably discard if she doesn't tell him to F off. It's power... being abused without tact.
The man used to "court" the woman and go on his knee to propose his devotion to her. This is beating the woman down so she cleans his shoes with her hair.
Where did the asker come up with this being a good question? It says something about personality and perception of position.

[Kurαȷ]

I would also hate that question, because it is a dumb question.
Someone's attraction towards someone shouldn't be quantifiable.

In fact, if someone gives me a compelling, objective reason why they chose me over any amount of other people, I would probably lose interest in them altogether.

Romance to me isn't shopping for the best computer parts, it should be impossible to explain.
I want to be liked for "I don't know, I just do!", that's the only legitimate attraction, in my opinion.

The rest is just convenience and calculation of people who have intrinsic romantic inclinations and are simply just looking for the least problematic sexual partner.

[VIVANT]

I agree

[NMMan]

Bravo, dude.

[CubsterShura]

If some sketchy-ass chap showed up with (or without) a microphone asking me that question out of nowhere, the best case scenario would be me asking "Who TF are you?" If a guy asked that on a date then you can be 101% certain I'm not going out on another date with this man.

No it's not because I'm insecure. It is because I don't want to bother with someone that dense. Anyone with the slightest bit of common sense will know that this question is moronic on a whole another level. If you're truly willing to know what someone has to offer, you do that by getting to know them. Talking to them, spending time with them, that's why you go out on dates, silly! When you get to know somebody, you will get to understand by yourself what that person has to offer that nobody else does.
That was how my boyfriend decided that I was the one he's looking for.

[VIVANT]

l. If you're truly willing to know what someone has to offer, you do that by getting to know them. Talking to them, spending time with them, that's why you go out on dates, silly! When you get to know somebody, you will get to understand by yourself what that person has to offer that nobody else does.
That was how my boyfriend decided that I was the one he's looking for.

👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

[yucychan]

I guess if you are looking for an answer, then that answer is "nothing".
There's always going to be another woman that can offer the same or even more.
It's just sad that you are with a woman because of what she can offer you, and not because you liked her.

[Apope16]

All good points. But you don't understand a fundamental concept. Every woman is with a man because of what he can offer them. Not based on just the fact that they like them. What this question does is flip the question on its head and forces a woman to know how a guy feels. Other than sex... what is it that you as a woman bring to the relationship? Many women dont have the inward confidence to even recognize their own value.

[jessloudmouth]

"Every woman is with a man because of what he can offer them."

No.

[Felicityoyo]

If I was with my husband simply because of financial benefits I'd be pretty stupid. I make more money than he does but that's fine. I'm not with him for his money. Im with him because he's been my best friend for 10 years. he's someone I can always rely on and someone I genuinely care about. He's with me because he knows I offer him the same love and support. It sounds to me like you've just never experienced a genuine connection with anyone, OP.

[DizzyDesii]

Im not insecure but i also ain't gonna lie. This is that question that i also fail at at job interviews. I think their are things about me that are rare but i dont think i have anything that makes me better than another woman (in your case) or another potential employee. Im just me, like it or read the message on the tshirt in my pfp 🤷‍♀️

[Apope16]

True. I think you bring up a good point. BUt I also think that this question hard for women because they never have to validate themself to men in the sexual market place. In society they never ask men out, or pay for the first drink (there are exceptions but you get my point). The point here is women are CONDITIONED to think that the man has to chase them and validate themselves to a woman. Women have gotten LAZY. They sit back and watch the men do everything. Then if it doesn't work out they have 50 other messages and possible dates with guys. They are so used to taking men for granted that they have straight up been lazy with men and dating.

[DizzyDesii]

You gotta stop saying women. Not all of us agree. People need to remember that words like SOME, MOST, and FEW exist for a reason. Part of why i didn't approach guys for a date was because i knew there was not much about me to make me standout. I do approach guys for convo and friendship. I may even ask for their number or if they wanna study together. But i’ll prob never flatout ask a dude on a date unless we’ve expressed mutual attraction. I accept that im not all that special. But the right one will find something special about me that i dont even know about myself. It doesn't make me insecure if i know who i am rather than what i may have to offer

[sillyfairy474]

I know personally, I wouldn’t appreciate that question (as it is currently written.) It has nothing to do with being insecure. But this isn’t a job interview so asking that question verbatim comes off tactless. I understand having that question as any person dating, not just a man. There are plenty of career women out there if that’s what you’re looking for. To say that most women only bring sex to the table seems to reflect more back on you and your mindset, rather than women or dating as whole. Also, if I go into a date feeling like you’re interviewing me and I like I have give a monologue describing why I deserve to be there, I’m not interested. Get to know me and find out or find a more tactful way to ask me the same question. That statement is abrasive, that’s why women get offended.

[sadiefluff]

A-fucking-men 🙌🏻

[jgibsonian1986]

I'm not sure any of us can offer anything another couldn't aside from genes even those sometimes. For me the question feels like less of one seeking the answer and more of one seeking their answer.

I'm not sure you can say this is a question any woman hates because if you asked a man the same it's just as possible that they will be offended. I'd be willing to say that if an employer asked the interviewed "What can you offer this company that someone else couldn't" it would challenge most people.

There is nothing one can give that another cannot, other than what is theirs to give. Their time, their love, their opinions and ideas. There is truly only one thing any of us can give that is even slightly unique, and it's ourselves.

[DellBell]

I'm sorry but why on earth would you ask a question like that? Why not just get to know the woman and find out for yourself? If you think she is different than the other ladies you have met? There is just some things you don't say to men and women specially on a date... this is definitely it! Also women would get red flags if they were asked something like this... I would for sure I would be thinking of great this guy wants to see what he can get from me... doesn't really want to get to know me and see for himself what makes me different and unique in my own ways... I'm sorry but asking a question like that on a date is a hudge turn off for women and I'm sure it would be for men as well... I'm sure they would be thinking jesus this woman crazy!

[Jack9949]

Exactly. Just get to know the actual goddamn person yourself.

[BilyanasBeach]

Why not ask "what are your favorutie qualities of yours" "what are you most proud of" ? you will get the same answer.
Isn't asking your question using an uno reverse card on a problem that you said men have experienced, and directing it towards women in a form of a question?
I read that you have a good intention and reason behind it, but on a first date, this question can leave a bad impression, you know it can, as I know and accept that this suggestion will get me thumbs downs lol

[jennifer_bloom]

I think of a relationship as a barbecue - you have regular items that everybody has like meat in some form and veggies but you might also have some rare items others do not have like chardonnay or egg custard - the egg custard and chardonnay are delightful and pleasant but they are not as important to the barbecue as the meat and veggies even though every barbecue has meat and veggies if you are doing it buffet party style - that is how I see the woman - what she offers that is common to other woman is more important than what she offers that is uncommon to other woman but what is uncommon brings more happiness than what is common - the selection of a mate and the participation of your life after you make your selection are two distinct ideas

[neurolove]

Most can bring children. Except. I never wanted any. That is only valued by men who do not want kids. This take doesn't apply to all women. You're really just stereotyping. I'm educated, I'm rich, I'm caring, sensual and a great cook who loves adventure and fun. And I'm hot. But that is subjective. What is this, a dating site? Why are you asking my value? I would not go for a man who goes around acting entitled as if I have to prove something. If you're smart and intuitive, you would figure that out on your own. The point is, everyone has value to someone. This take is too trite.

[hwydrod21]

While I can understand the fascination with a conversation around this question, it often isn't the question itself that upsets the female. Someone in the comments said "what makes you unique?" Now putting it that way, makes it much more palatable.

The OP seems to have traditionalist values and is biased in this sense. Why would women be surprised at office politics or how hard life is more than a man? Women have been working for quite a while now. Also, men who pursue a career driven women isn't inherently lazy.

I have a degree, and a good job. It's entirely possible for me to want a women with career aspirations as well. Skills like cooking, cleaning, laundry, and sexual pleasure, should be learned by both genders in this modern era. There's no excuse not to know how to be an adult. There isn't always a one income household anymore and it isn't because women are working, it's because men still expect women to go-to work and be a traditional housewife.

[mrfoox]

At first i was a little annoyed about this question but then I thought about it, and I think I understand what you're saying. It's about knowing yourself and what you have for strong qualities. I know I've been bad in the past to know myself and I have been working on reflecting and understanding who I am. Easy to find negatives but I've definitely found good things I do and can do
Think we can all benefit from looking not only at ourselves but within ourselves too and learn and understand who we are

[opnbuk59]

Your right and it's about people want to live in this fantasy land not wanting to hear io to tell face reallyr the truth instead bull shit you with fancy sayings or run to someone who won't challenge them but valid as asking this question is it's not a make or break stay or leave situation should be a defining moment make you do and really take a hard close look look at you who you really are what your about it's not s negative or calling you out. Each of us at times thought it lives should stop and see our selves this save thing it's not a question for women but all of us people start taking an honest approach to who they truly are might be a better place, everyone start removing the man they been hiding behind realize there really is s beautiful person behind it