When Your Girlfriend Doesn't Text You Unless Texted... Good or Bad?

[KuddleKinz]

I text my girlfriend a lot. But recently, I've been busy and haven't been texting her as frequently. But she will NEVER text me first. I always have to be the one starting the conversation. I always tell her she can text me whenever she feels like it. Perhaps I shouldn't text her unless she texts me first? I don't know. She's never busy, and she's always posting things onto Instagram and Facebook. What's your opinion?

[creativeusername95]

I think that she probably feels like you are beginning to become uninterested. Although this sounds crazy, it's probably true. If you try to think about it from her point of view, here you are, texting her first a lot and then all of a sudden you aren't texting Her first as much. I know you are busier and that's why, but she doesn't know that. Even if you tell her that she will think you are just trying to comfort her. Girls are naturally insecure and need their and your feelings reinforced on a regular basis. It seems like you texting her first, to her, is a confirmation of your level of commitment and interest in the relationship. It's sad to say, but our generation absolutely needs validation through short, typed, convenient text, to feel secure in our relationships. Her not texting you first could simply be her trying to pull back so she can see if you pursue her, so that she can feel out where your head is as far as you two's relationship goes.

I hope that brought you into the girls mind a little bit!

[love2run13]

How long have you been dating? If you just started becoming official boyfriend/girlfriend stuff, it could be that she is uncertain about your level of interest and doesn't want to appear to be too eager or annoy you with constant texting. If you guys have been together for a while, it might mean that she IS in fact busy (just cuz you post things a lot on social media doesn't mean she's not busy lol) and she is tired of texting in general all the time. She might be the type of person that feels comfortable enough in the relationship that she doesn't feel like she needs to be constantly in contact with you. Also, YOUR concept of texting a lot or too little may be way different that HER concept of too much or too little texting. OR worst case problem, she is loosing interest. I would just ask her directly about it.

[KuddleKinz]

We've been dating for about two and a half years. It turns out that she just didn't want to annoy me because she knew I was busy. But thanks so much for the help! I truly appreciate it.

[AvaMarina]

She might dislike texting. I usually just waited for my ex (boyfriend at the time) to text me, until he mentioned that it bothered him, because I'm not a fan of texting.

If she normally likes texting though, I might be a little worried. You could wait even longer, to see if she'll eventually text first, but if she really won't start a conversation... ask her outright why she never does. Don't make it sound aggressive or accusatory, of course, but keep it casual.

[AvaMarina]

Thanks for MHO. :)

[KuddleKinz]

Couldn't help it. You answered my question perfectly. Thanks a bunch!

[L_gant]

This is the MOST HELPFUL THING EVER!!! All my girlfriends except for one did this and it always bothered me and made me think she didn't really like me but now I know she just doesn't like texting lol

[Bilalkhan4]

Good answer !!

[wonderhappytime]

The main thing you have to be worried about is whether your girlfriend is willing to talk to you at all. If she talks to you a lot, all the time, but not through text, she probably just doesn't like texting. Maybe she thinks its ineffective, or misleading, or something else. However, if she doesn't talk to you at all, it suggested she may not want to date you anymore, or is bored of you. something along the lines of bad.

[soneoak]

Woops, I did with with my now ex- girlfriend, she always initiated text til a bit of time later.

Usually because I was busy and didn't really know what to say. Sometimes worried if I was bothering her. =P.

[emmabee11]

Id just do whatever and enjoy yourself, if she doesn't text you then ok... won't effect you having a good time lol i think she doesn't text you as to make you worry all the time so she keeps you on your toes lol we know you guys always tend to like the chase more than us girls do, i would try not texting her for a couple of days and then make her worry for a change, but if it doesn't work... don't know what to tell you... lol. Us girls in general never know when to text a guy anyway because you make us feel like we are beng clingy or annoying or doing something wrong because you then back away when we do text you like you asked lol we feel like we can't win ether so we just let you text us.

[Poppie07]

Why don't you pick up the phone and call her lol? But look girl's are fucking crazy as cat shit let's be honest. Any chick who is attracted to you or with you will blow ur cell up and basically annoy the fuckkk outta you for some attention POINT-BLANK-PERIOD. Also u say u work a lot so that could be a reason too. I think you two should have a serious talk about whatever is bothering you. I've been there and if she has time to go on social media than she has time to say hi at least every once and a while. The first wireless phone was invented in the 70's it's 2015 what person young or old doesn't have that thing attached to their hip-.- Hate to break it to you bro but when there is a withdrawal of some sort... most likely she isn't interested in you anymore and probably is giving that attention to someone else darling :'(

[tibbany]

She probably doesn't know she's even doing it. For example me and this guy started texting and I also woke up late around one. So he would have already texted me by then or about to. Also if I did wake up earlier I wouldn't text him because I was afraid he'd probably be asleep due to the fact he would text me around the same time everyday. Then I realized that it looked like if he didn't text me I wouldn't text him first. Which was not the case at all but honestly you should tell her in person why she does it and how it makes you feel

[rosedream]

Ummm... firstly, this may be because she doesn't love u so much. If u r in her mind all the time, she will text u even though u don't text her. She doesn't have much feeling about u. OR, secondly, she maybe quite shy or she may think the guy should always start a conversation. That's maybe because of her opinion or behaviour. So don't worry too much. It doesn't matter whether she starts text u or not. When u message her, she replies and both of u have a nice time. That's more important than everything. Good luck ☺☺

[veronica44]

She may just dislike texting, and it may bring back bad memories of years ago when texting. This is the same case with me, whenever I text my boyfriend, I weirdly think back to a relationship I had with a guy who I was needy with and he was rude about it in our break up.. Strange I know, but could be.

[cpsw111]

First possible reasons : She's just not interested in you anymore
Second possible reason : She really do like you a lot, she just doesn't feel like texting because testing isn't her thing

[Blondiee2014]

She's got you where she wants you.
All you need to do is just enjoy life and forget about texting her, she will be the one messaging you.
If not ditch her she doesn't really want you.

[aimeelizz]

I personally dislike texting, so perhaps your girlfriend does too. My friend told me she likes that I always message her first because she always feel like she's bugging me when she starts - I don't really think about coming across like that but your girlfriend might. But if you've been going out a while then that shouldn't be the case. I think you should speak to her about it - in person - and see how she responds. I'm sure she'll give you an honest answer.

[SphNls]

Maybe you text more than you realize?
I would also try not texting 'till she texts back (without saying that's why you did it)
Might prove not so easy... make sure you set your mind to it

[oliverscottsykes]

It depends. Some girls, like me, love it when guys start the conversation. For some girls, having to start the conversation makes them feel like they're annoying him. But like I said, it depends.

[jewen]

I despise that tbh but playing the role of the guy you generally have to do it if the relationship isn't legit. But if is the girl will randomly send jokish texts. Also you need to chill and become a man, mate you are busy if you're not busy get busy show her you're not needy and reduce the texts by half. then when she asks why you didn't text her for a week just say you could have texted me when I wasn't busy. If you feel uncomfortable always texting her first, just don't. Be Happy :)

[PurpleM]

Since she's always on IG & Facebook she's occupied... but I think it's bad she should text you first sometimes. But you shouldn't text her first one day and see if she text you.

[Michael-in-SC]

Totally good. I despise texting. And when I do (through Google Voice), I'll frequently include the letters NRN at the end to indicate, "No Reply Necessary." I'd rather a partner just call or email me.

[AmberDawnxo]

Its not nessicarily black or white like that. Ask her gently and see if her response is genuine and go from there.

[itsalexandra]

Call her! It's such a great gesture that doesn't really happen anymore. 100 times better than any text!

[Anonymous]

That sounds like she's not actually interested. And it sounds like your putting all the effort. I would try to not try as much and if it continues I would say to just end it. It doesn't sound good and it pry causes negative thoughts and feelings.

[Kshppatel]

She's in control of the relationship. You need let her know that you aren't afraid to lose her and make her afraid to lose you srs.

[Anonymous]

Let her text first before you do she's probably spoiled by the fact that she can be mindless about you for a while because u always think about her first

[ToNarnia]

Omg do not stop texting her when she notices she will probably feel some type of way... She may just want you to do it because your the male figure.
P. s. to all men not texting us pisses us of so much

[JustWannaBeFree]

She's probably just insecure about texting you first. I know a lot of people, girls especially, who wait until someone else text first because they're afraid that they're annoying them by texting so much.

[LadybugT]

I hate texting so unless it requires a response then no text

[insanerzinsanity]

That's odd. That's not a good sign that's all I can tell you.

[Valiant]

Do not worry it is good, Freedom is most important in love,

[dthdhdghadh]

She's trying to establish more pull.

[Beous]

Bad because she doesn't miss you!

[Anonymous]

She's getting analed from some Alpha McThughcock.