Guys, why do you try to make girls jealous?

Guys, why do you try to make girls jealous?If you and a girl are actively flirting and it's clear enough that she likes you and you like her why would you all of a sudden start trying to make her jealous by flirting with other girls right in front of her. Doesn't it make more sense to just flirt with the girl you like and have that move forward? If a guy starts flirting with another girl in front of me my first instinct is to move on and assume he isn't that into me...So why do you guys do this?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • it doesn't work on men, but it works on women.

    Jealous promotes needy and clingy behavior. It makes women fight for their man and show more interest, call more often and thus it works.

    The problem with making a man jealous is the fact that it makes him LESS attractive. He becomes needy and clingy, he calls more and suddenly you like him less.

    The other thing it does, is like you said, it makes you assume he doesn't like you, which is actually to his benefit.

    If he shows too much interest, then he's creepy.

    If he shows none, than he's safe.

    If he shows Disinterest, then you like him.

    Creepy is showing interest too soon for no good reason, combined with wanting it more than the other person.

    And if you want it more than he does (which now you are thinking about him now because of what he did, which means you are more invested in him than you were before, and more than some joe blow that you blew off 2 seconds ago) Then it works.

    When its not working, its working.

    And that's why men do it.

    Men would not do it, if women didn't train men to behave this way.

    Its obviously asshole behavior, but as we all know, women like assholes. SO congrats, you get what you ask for.

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    • Noooo that's actually not true. This part 'The other thing it does, is like you said, it makes you assume he doesn't like you, which is actually to his benefit.'

      Because when a girl doesn't think a guy likes them most of them actually get mad and give up after a few attempts. Like that whole hot and cold thing guys use, that only works for awaile, at least with me. Then I'm done.There's only so much a girls heart can take.

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    • "If he shows Disinterest, then you like him."

      FALSE all of this is false you're just attracting dysfunctional women into your life
      good luck with that.

    • So you’re saying it’s women’s fault? pfft you should learn to take responsibility for your own actions first , don’t just do things and then blame the others , have some personality man

  • some guys are players and some use that make the girl jealous thing to test a girl to see if she really wants to keep him ... ya know that posession thing and if she doesn't care to want to do anything to keep the guy than the girl doesn't want the guy ...

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    • Or if she doesn't care, she may just walk away because she doesn't want to get hurt... And because making someone jealous is an extremely unattractive method, she actually might have been turned off by the guy at this time.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Guys try to make girls jealous out of insecurity. It's a stupid thing to do, I know, and not all guys do so, but some immature guys will try to test you by flirting with other girls. The best you can do is ignore him.

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    • what kind of a shit test is that? sometimes we have no claim to the person what are we supposed to do? it's so fucked.

  • He's trying to see your reaction, see how into him you actually are...sad but true. Now the next move from you is to let him know how to treat you. If you blow it off then he knows he can do whatever he wants whenever he wants and get away with it. If you don't blow it off then he will, or at least he SHOULD, never do that again because he knows there's a possibility of losing you and then he will be stuck with one of those nameless ones he was flirting with, and I'm sure he doesn't really want that anyway.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 25

  • Because it makes you think about us more and keeps the spark.

    It's a stupid thing, and I wish we didn't have to do it, but it works.

    Girls don't like feeling like they're the only one until it's a relationship.

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    • I think a guy might be doing that to me at the moment but he's making it known to me that he's flirting with this one girl or is he just being a dick?

    • I don't know that just makes me withdraw and shut down emotionally

  • jealousy lead to anger and anger lead to the dark side

    I would never intentionally try to make someone jealous. that just not smart thinking.

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  • Because he isn't confident enough to go about it another way. Girls do this too. Sometimes it will actually make the other person lose interest though so I don't suggest you or anyone else play hard to get too much.

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  • I dont, I would also care less if she was the jealous type. I rather have that in a serious relationship. but if she's clingy towards me then idont have to worry about her with other men. So tired of woman who think they need to be friends with every man who hits on them when they are in a relationship while men tend to push woman away.

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  • Ok. This is dumb but it's the only rational thing I can think of. Guys like to make girls jealous so that the girl in her fit of jealousy might stake claim on the guy thereby assuring the guy he isn't gonna lose this girl anytime soon. It's like a validation.

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  • I have seen it used before. It is a tactic designed to make you think he has many prospects going for him. For guys, it is a balancing act remaining masculine and detached while seeming interested in you. The common wisdom is, if a woman sees a guy who is lusted after by several women then she will see him as a sort of "Alpha Male" and want to be with him. There are whole books and classes based off this concept and manipulating it with some degree of control can make otherwise unsuccessful guys more successful with girls.

    Of course, some girls read this as being shifty and avoid those guys like the plague. Like any good war you choose your tactic and you take your chances. You throw out the paper and sometimes she throws scissors, sometimes she throws rock.

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  • I dont...but then again, its a lot easier for a girl to get attention than a guy. So I would say you have field advantage on this one.

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  • people like to play games, and if you think that its only guys who do that type of thing, you have a lot to think about

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    • Yea, girls do that to. Girls can be really mean. But, Idk

  • I have no idea, but this guy really sounds like an asshole. Your story makes me want to punch him in the face. Please move on for your sake.

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    • K. Thanks. A lot of friends told me the same (:

  • That just seems weird to me. I remember what it was like at 13 and I just don't see me, nor any other guy I knew doing that.

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  • It shows that he's having a great time with other people. If at a party, i will too try to engage conversations with random people.

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  • yeh. for me it's like an overwhelming instinct to make a girl who likes me jealous, I don't know why.

    i might do it in front of a girl I wasn't sure about just to show her I'm not fixated on her, and I do have other options, I'm not some desperate guy.

    it usually works to be fair.

    but I would NEVER EVER do this to a girl if I thought she was the sort of girl who would just be hurt, some girls (usually the more "truetothemselves" ones) won't take that crap for a second, you can tell they just see right through what you're doing and start thinking of you as a jerk.

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  • I think B they might be intimidated by how pretty you are.

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    • I get a lot of attention but honestly I think I'm ok. Some of the guys that try to make me jealous are really cute

  • No, not at all. I don't play games with people I like.

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  • it's not my intention to make you jealous, it's my intention to give all my girls equal time

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  • I never tried that.

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  • The same reason girls do.

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    • people say that but I don't

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    • They probably like you or you are an easy target.

    • I'm not an easy target. I couldn't date ( I just turned 16) so I ignored the guys. I'm not stupid and I don't act stupid.

  • some do, but not all ya know it's variable

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  • Same reason girls do it.

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  • Same reason women do it to men, they like to play games

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  • no. if yes that's because he wants to speed up the "process"

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  • That's pretty pathetic. If a guy does this he's definitely not worth it.

    I actually go out of my way to NOT make them jealous. Like only talking to another girl when she's not around. Because even if it's just a normal conversation, she will get jealous. Some girls get jealous over anything... like you can't even say 'good morning' to another girl.

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    • I think it's a bit far if you can't even talk to other girls, you shouldn't stress over that and if a girl gets that jealous over you just talking then imagine how clingy she'll be in a relationship.

  • I try not to do it intentionally but have done it on ocassion accidentilly. I was talking at one point to this girl who is a close friend she has a boyfriend so nothing is going to happen, any way my crush like death glared her kinda like what the f*** are you around him for. I hope you don't count things like that as him trying to make you intentionally jelous

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    • Haha, they all death glare each other all the time, when they are competing for a guy.

    • lol true but it was strong enough I could like feel the tention in the air. it was actually kinda hot seeing her get that mad over me.

    • No lol I don't count that as him trying to make me jealous, I'm not actually a jealous person. I have a lot of guy friends so I know girls and guys can just be friends so when he talks to other girls I'm totally fine with it. He has just said that he thinks there have been pretty girls around sort of thing, casually and I didn't get jealous...

  • No, I don't play that game. It's pathetic, no matter what gender plays it. Total turn off.

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  • no, that is a game girls play. Guys generally don't do that.

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What Girls Said 8

  • Its the other way around just as often you know? People are gonna be people, bitches-bitches, etc.

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  • because he want you to like him more i guess or want him more,... I don't know lol

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  • I don't know Why,i myself wonder,my EX always say BS to make me jealouse but he doesn't know that it doesn't work with me.

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  • Honestly I hate it when guys flirt with other girls it bothers me especially when U really really like that guy a lot and he's just with another girl laughing and having a great time right there in front of u the first time I got jealous was when I didn't even know what the word was for having this kind of weird feeling once I found out I was like ohhhhhh so that's what it feels like to be jealous but I hate the feeling so much then it just makes u wonder all day does he like the other girl and not me was he playing me and it just makes the girl each day just get over that guy 1 by 1

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  • he'd flirt with other girls mostly

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  • This tactic doesn't wash with me. It smacks of desperation and insecurity and I don't feed it by reacting. It doesn't make me feel special, it makes me feel embarrassed for him. It's usually done by guys who feel I'm out of their league, like they are trying to tell me they are in hot demand, so how lucky am I to have him. If you want to push a woman away, then this is a good move. Otherwise, don't do it.

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  • Because they think it's funny to toy with people's feelings

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    • It never works. None of those guys I liked

  • If a guy liked you and wanted to make you jealous, you would probably see him flirting with other girls in front of you or somewhere near where you can see.

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