Why do I keep attracting the wrong girls?!!

OK I'm gonna try and say all of this without trying to sound like a female. Also, if I offend anyone please forgive me.

I just don't understand why I am attracting certain types of girls. The only girls I ever attract these days are sluts (again, forgive me for being harsh) or girls who are just interested in sex, like a FWB thing or flings. I'm not the kind of guy who is interested in flings or FWB or even one night stands, and NO I'm NOT GAY! I'd rather have a meaningful passionate relationship with a girl, but it seems those kind of girls are hard to find these days. I love to take a girl out to dinner (or even cook dinner for her), take a walk on the beach, spoil her and make her feel like a princess etc but I always end up attracting girls who are not interested in relationships.

The girls I am interested in are either already in a relationship or are not looking for a relationship (at least not with me anyway). I do approach girls and have gone on dates and stuff but it never leads to anything.

I doubt it's my personality. I'm definitely more of a shy and quiet guy but I still muster up the courage to ask girls out. I'm definitely not a guy who thinks he's hot sh*t and can pick up any girl I feel like. I am a fun loving guy who loves to have a laugh.

What can I do to attract the right girls?


Most Helpful Guy

  • A lot of people ask why I'm attracting the wrong types when they are overlooking the simple fact they are attracting. Part of the process is your going to get bad with the good. If your truly attracting women then there is nothing to fix on your part. Sit back and take pride in the fact that women are after you regardless of how you deem them to be. Some guys are not even getting that...

    Perhaps it's not what your attracting, but your using the same locales that has the same types of women. Are you going to places where women you'd want are going? You mentioned cooking, ever take a cooking class for the fun of it (can be a great place)?

    if it has anything to do with your personality you seem to have a problem with guys being concieted... On some level you have to be like that with yourself. You have to have self confidence. You have to believe you can do anything you want and achieve it, it's part of being a man. Saying to people your god, ummmm not so much, but believing in yourself is a definite!

    Hope you get it solved man and good luck


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • You've already taken the first step by acknowledging your pattern. For some reason on a deep level, you're attracting the same type of women. You have an expectation that all women are like that, so that's what you're going to continue to attract. Just by stating "the only girls I ever attract these days are sluts," you're putting it out there. You have to recognize that NOT ALL women are like that, and focus on WHY you think you like them. There's something about them that is drawing you in. Picture all of these girls...what do they have in common? Once you recognize that, focus on the qualities that you DO want. Open yourself up and realize that the woman you want might not "look" the way you expect. Also, gove yourself more credit. You seem to have good intentions, so your luck will turn around once you break your pattern :)

  • maybe you're just looking at all the wrong ones,ya know the ones that are whorish and putout.. and overlooking the cute,shy sweet ones!approach those types of girls more (they suit you better)and then you'll find them!just be confident and talk to them.


What Guys Said 1

  • It's really rare to date a girl before you two have had sex. Where are you meeting these chicks? Try a library or bookstore. There are girls out there like that, but they aren't really the ones you're going to meet and pick up. You need to be a little sexual to attract a girl, you can't come off as this totally Asexual guy and expect a girl to think of being with you.