Girl I'm dating stayed up till 6am talking with a guy she used to have a relationship with?

[Anonymous]

Been seeing each other for about 6 months, we are exclusive, but not official yet. She just texted me casually that she was tired cause she was up until 6am talking to a friend overseas. I asked where they lived. She told me the netherlands.

She has mentioned this guy before, and that they have dated/hooked up and she would have an open relationship with him if that is what she wanted one.

I don't know how to feel about this. We have been having some issues lately, but have resolved to fix them. And then she just drops this like it's no big deal. I find it deeply disrespectful. Given the context of their relationship, and what she has told me about him.

How should I handle this? I am fucking pissed, but not sure if I need to ask her what they talked about first. But doubt she would tell me if the convo got romantic or sexual at all.

[Barbaric]

You need to leave her. You're putting up with too much nonsense. She acts like this because she doesn't respect you, and then when you do nothing about it her respect for you drops further.

From looking at your previous questions people keep telling you to leave and you always seem to ask her about it, she gives you some bullshit excuse, you say that you're pissed off but you still stay.

If you get cheated on after all these arguments you keep having and she's taking off and talking to other guys, it's your fault for being a pussy. It wouldn't surprise me though if you find an excuse to stay even then.

[Asker]

No, I agree I have put up with a lot. It's hard for me to find women I feel strongly for, but even that has a limit. If she cheated I wouldn't have a second thought about leaving her.

[Barbaric]

Why is it hard? She's not as great as you've built her up in your mind. She just sounds like a thot to me. And you should always put your self-respect before any woman, because if you don't they won't respect you either and the relationship is doomed anyway. Like I said before a woman who genuinely likes you will want to lock you down fast, and she won't have an interest in other men. Anything short of that and you should get out of there for your own good.

[zomegagon]

I feel like she is playing games. She let you know about her talking to the other guy to try to get a rise out of you. My hypothesis is that this girl has some destructive / toxic tendancies, but you'd know best. If she does, she likely doesn't know it, or doesn't fully know it, and will need to do some growing up before she figures it out-- which people sometimes need to do on their own.

You should let her figure it out on her own, but you should definitely get how she made you feel out in the open in a way that gets it off your chest and let's her hear it. I write shit down before I'm going to say it, personally-- or write a letter.

If it were me, I'd have dumped her at the first sign of trouble, but I've had a couple similar experiences. Time is the mother of wisdom.

TL;DR - say your peace and get out. She needs to grow up.

[Hssbvs]

Yeah it seems a bit strange that she would just drop it like its nothing but she could be wanting to see your reaction and see if your jealous. I would ask her about it and ask if it got romantic. See what she says. Tell her how you feel, its been six months so its not like you just met. If you want to get more serious, start working on that now. I hope it goes well for you and works out but focus on you too and your health xxx

[zomegagon]

Lol, you said it better than me!

[Hssbvs]

@zomegagon lol thanks

[Anonymous]

I read your previous questions please explain this to me because it sound like she giving you hell and doesn’t respect you

[Barbaric]

I don't now why you got a downvote, I just checked his older questions and you're spot on.

[Barbaric]

know*

[Opinion Owner]

@Barbaric it’s probably a troll account honest smh and thanks

[Asker]

Basically, she has been intereseted in open relationships, or some form of it. I am not really the type, but open minded so I had the discussion but basically told her if that's what she wants it would have to be with someone else. She has mentioned during one of those convos, that she's not sure if she wants it or not, but if she did there was a guy in the netherlands that she would be interested in doing that with. Also, that she really likes me and wants to see where it goes.

Then today she tells me this, after we have been having some arguments lately, but have resolved to fix this issue and recommit in a sense. I am also supposed to meet her parents soon, and her mine.

She has asked me to bring up issues in the moment and not hold them in. So I told her I am not really psyched about this. She says that she understands, but that she hopes I realize that he is not a threat. So that is where I am at now. Haven't texted her back yet.

[Asker]

Lol, not a troll account. I am a real person, and this shit is really happening...

[Opinion Owner]

Ummm so what you suppose to be? Her option on a waiting list? You deserve so much better I promise ya. I don’t bring no man home unless I am marrying him.

[Opinion Owner]

I was talking about the female downvote lol not you

[Tyrael]

How can you be together six months and be exclusive, but not official? It's been a while since I was in the dating game but that just sounds weird to me.

[Barbaric]

She's playing him. Usually it's the guy who doesn't want to be official, but here she's the one who doesn't want it.

How long should I wait for her to decide to be with me? ↗

And she wants to get banged by other guys:

Girl I'm seeing wants to have a threesome, with another guy, but I am not into the idea. What do you think and how should I handle this? ↗

Because she's a thot:

Girl I'm dating has slept with a lot of her friends, and it makes me a bit jealous and insecure. What should I do about this? ↗

[Tyrael]

Ah fair enough. Well I'm glad to see it is strange as I suspected and I'm not just old and out the loop lol

[Asker]

Lol, yeah. She is the one that "isn't sure yet" I have gone along with it for now. Most of this shit has all happened in the last couple months. But. I'm starting to lose interest to say the least. Was gonna give it till the end of the year to see what her answer is, and if it's still the same, then I'mma peace out

[Barbaric]

You should have left ages ago, I don't get it. Why are you waiting so long? Her behaviour signals a lack of respect and a lack of genuine interest. Girls who like you want to lock you down fast, otherwise you're plan B guy, and that never ends well, ever.

[Asker]

@Barbaric Yeah man, I don't know. Part of me believes that but sometimes it's hard for me unless something has actually happened and not just talk. But might need to cut this one short. Feeling like it's not worth the stress she causes me. Especially when I have exes hitting me up that I have been ignoring or telling I'm not interested.