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So this may seem like a weird take, but seeing as there are a lot of articles out there on how to be a good boyfriend, I wanted to do something a little different. This should of course be used more as a guideline of what not to do.
If for any reason you are seriously thinking of actually following what this take says (e.g. because you want to break up with your girlfriend and think it will be easier to just put her of you), then this is not a very good way to go about it, and I would strongly advise against it. If you want to break up with your girlfriend, just let her down gently. Actually following what this take says can be very damaging.
Anyway now I have said that out of the way, let me begin. Here is how to be a bad boyfriend:
1.) Don't be loyal
Cheat on her constantly - flirt with other girls, hang out alone with other girls, "like" and comment on their pictures on Facebook saying things like "You're hot ;P", "Gorgeous" and maybe even "Stunning. Wish I had a girlfriend like you" (maybe throw in a pair of heart eyes); Hug and kiss other girls too, don't tell them you've got a girlfriend. Text, call and Skype other girls frequently. If your girlfriend gets upset/angry and/or asks you to stop doing these things, don't listen. Carry on upsetting her.
2.) Remain in close contact with your ex and constantly bring her up
Text, call and Skype your ex. Leave her messages saying that you miss her and comment and like her pictures most of all. Tell your girlfriend that you miss your ex, and bring her up at inappropriate times e.g. -
- If you and your girlfriend are led in bed cuddling and she has her face hidden in your neck, ask if she is going to give you a love bite since that's what your ex would do when she was led like that with you.
- After kissing, say something like "Hmm, not bad. Not as good as my ex though"
- interrupt your girlfriend when she is speaking to bring up some random memory of your ex like "We went Go Karting once it was so fun!", "I remember when she kissed me for the first time" or "I took her to *insert name of expensive restaurant* once". Bring random things like this up constantly, even if it in no way relates to what your girlfriend is saying.
3.) Get distracted at inappropriate times
For example: Start watching TV in the middle of when you are making out or doing anything otherwise intimate, stop her from talking when she is trying to speak to you and look out the window because you saw a plane, bird, balloon or rainbow; if you are hugging her, suddenly stop, let her go and walk away because you remembered about a song on YouTube you wanted to listen to.
4.) Frequently ignore your girlfriend's messages
Don't get back to her until she sends a follow up to her last message. If you want to be a really bad boyfriend, don't even do this. If you do get back to answering her message at all, don't do so until hours, days or possibly even weeks after she's sent it. You could even try going months without answering. If she asks you why you take so long to get back to her, make up a poor excuse such as that you were on Xbox or your phone needed charging/resetting (even though this wouldn't take a week to do). Better still, just avoid the topic and put something like "Lol".
5.) Never show her affection in public
This not only means no hugging and kissing her in public, but also not holding her hand or even so much as putting your arm around her in public. Make it seem like you're not even together. If she ever asks why you never hold her hand in public, just say you don't want to, or if the weather's hot then "I'll hold your hand more when the weather is cooler", but if the weather is cool, say something like "It's too cold, I prefer keeping my hands in my pockets in this weather to keep them warm". Should she try to show any affection to you in public, move away quickly.
6.) Never do anything nice for her
Never buy her little gifts "just because", or write her love letters, or cook for her, or take her on dates, never lend her your jacket when it's cold or surprise visit her or call her when she's down just to cheer her up. Don't do anything thoughtful for her. Don't even get her anything for her birthday or Christmas. Don't bother being grateful when she does anything nice for you either.
Only ever do anything thoughtful for her when she asks. Again, if you want to be a really bad boyfriend, don't even do this.
7.) Frequently let her down
- Agree a date to meet up, but then council for the majority of the time. Use excuses like "Can't today I'm tired", "It's my goldfish's birthday" or "I have to buy a new TV"
- If you do end up meeting up, tell her you have a surprise for her so she gets all excited. When you see each other and she asks about the surprise, disappoint her by saying the surprise was that there wasn't one (or make up some rubbish "surprise").
- Flirt with her and tell her you are going to hug and kiss her when you see her and make her blush. When you actually meet up, do none of this. In fact listen to #5 and don't even hold her hand. Just act in a grumpy mood all day and barely speak. If you do, just complain about everything and keep stating that you're bored.
8.) Undermine her
Tell her that yes, that dress does make her look fat, complain she needs to lose weight or that her breasts are too small, complain that your "ex never acted like that" etc.
Never say any of this in a "jokey" way. Make sure you sound as though you are being deadly serious like yes, you are that much of a twat.
9.) Lie to her
Even if she knows you are lying and even has evidence of that, insist that you are telling the truth and continue to lie to her. Constantly.
10.) Make her worry
You can do this in a variety of ways -
- One would be to play "Hot and cold". This where you act like you're all in love and crazy about her.. only to later send her a message like "I'm not so sure about this anymore :/" or if she asks if you still love her, respond with something like "I don't know anymore" or "I'm not sure". Later go back to acting all in love with her, only to later repeat the process.
- Another way would be to say "I guess" or "Not really" when she asks if you are okay. When she asks what's up, tell her not to worry but hint as though something is really wrong. When she asks about it again, make sure to spend 10-20 minutes before answering anything, simply to give her anxiety.
- Yet another way would be to open her messages but not respond to them for ages like in #4, only to remain active on social media and possibly post things like "Feeling uncertain :/" or "I'm not sure about anything anymore :(" just to shake her up a bit.
There are many other ways too and many other ways of being a bad boyfriend all together. Remember though, that this is a guideline of what NOT to do. If you want to break up with someone, just do it. Don't do the things listed here as even though breaking up with someone can upset them, it will be much more upsetting and damaging to them if you do the things listed here, as well as bad for your reputation. It strongly advised NOT to do any of the things in this take.
I hope you all enjoyed reading and feel free to add anything. Of course all this can be changed to show "How to be a bad girlfriend" too.
PS, before anyone asks, no, I have not had anyone treat me this badly don't worry lol. However, little bits here and there have happened (e.g, I did used to see a guy who would remain in contact with his ex though not quite like in the MyTake and who would lie to me a lot and be a bit hot and cold sometimes though again, not quite like in the MyTake. My current boyfriend did used to bring up his ex now and again and does sometimes get distracted at inappropriate times. As for the part about ignoring messages for days, I have had this happen to friends of mine with their boyfriends - including one of them who didn't get back to my friend for about a week and told her that he just had to charge and reset his phone).
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