Here's What I Like About Men

AmandaYVR
Heres What I Like About Men

I get these random thoughts in my head. Today I was eating dinner - I made Italian sausages, roasted brussel sprouts, and some new-fangled tomato-stuffed gnocchi, and two out of those three things were new, so maybe it jarred something loose in my brain. I don't know. And I was reading something on GAG and it got me thinking. I get these thoughts randomly and spontaneously, and think, well maybe I should write about that. So here another one...

I like that men have a way of summarizing things (stories, details, complex situations) in so few words, and in an overall typically concise, succinct manner, when generally compared to women. I often don't know how you do it. Okay, sometimes you leave out waaay too many details for my taste, and sometimes it's so abbreviated I have no idea what you're talking about, but mostly, I give you credit for your ability to get right to the point, the nitty gritty, cut to the chase, hit the nail on the head... oh wait, I'm doing it again. How does one choose the words and just end there. I don't know but you do. Maybe you're more decisive. But good on you. Your shortened paragraphs here, and in life, are often appreciated.

I like that you are problem solvers. Yes, at times it is annoying that you seem to only want to solve problems, and not listen and/or just sympathize, but I understand and respect you for your problem-solving abilities and tendencies, and not wanting us to dwell on the ridiculous intricacies and minutia of life, and quoting who said this and that, and what happened next. It's too much. You get shit done, quite often. Or at least, you want to. Goal - plan - execution - done. Very good.

I like that you don't (often) hold grudges as long or as deep as many females, from what I have observed (and yes, maybe felt myself, particularly in my younger days.) I'm not really sure how you do it, but there is the classic example of getting into a physical altercation/fist fight, and then somehow y'all decide, 'What's done is done, we move on now.' Interesting. And very commendable.

I like your ability to compartmentalize. Sometimes it makes it feel like you treat things as so distinct and separate from one another when they shouldn't be (maybe), but you guys seem to have more laser focus on the task at hand, or a problem to solve, or a piece of equipment that's acting up. I can't say for sure that you can emotionally compartmentalize all past negative experiences, etc. (you definitely don't get over feeling wronged by an ex any easier than women/girls do), but I've seen the brain scans where when recalling past events, less areas of men's brains light up, but the areas that do light up have more magnetic 'heat' on the MRIs, and I have found this to be true as well. You don't pull every sight, sound, smell, song, and especially memory from the past and dump it all into one pile, and look for all the connections and interplay. Forgive and forget are good words to live by. It is said men are more "singularly-focused" and I agree. (Plus, I get to listen to music or watch TV and my husband can better drown it out than I ever can. I take everything in. All the time. Whether I like it or not.)

I like that you are strong and can lift things that are difficult for me. I will try, yes, and I have shoved more sofas and chairs and got them in and out of more doorways than you can count, but I have also dropped boxes full of fragile stuff and wrecked my back trying to lift up the rabbit cage, and found out that there is a definite physical cost to owning higher quality heavier furniture, and just about everything else I like (I sort of have a philosphical rule about no plastics in my life.) And I tend to shop for a week's worth of food at a time cause I hate going to the grocery store. Yesterday I carried 24 lbs home and I hated every bit of it. So thank you thank you thank you for every time that you offer "I'll grab that" out of my/our hands. Bless you. My hands were hurting.

Thanks for being into me/us, initiating contact, initiating sex. You guys got the raw end of the deal on that one. Call it biology or what have you, but you end up putting yourself out there more than the other way around. Although as I've said before in mytakes, etc., I am a firm, firm believer that women need to step up much more than they are, and show (and tell) their guys when they want something. Cause we do, quite often, want you too. You're sexy, and sweet, and I like your beard stubble and when your hair's mussed up in the morning, with your boxer briefs and mug of hot coffee. I compliment you quite often, and I think other girls should too. I think you should hear that we appreciate you.

And my final thought (cause as my gift to you, I won't make this too too long) is thanks for all your interesting contributions on GAG. You answer more, contribute more, write more, and many days here I can honestly say that you write something that makes me smile, or makes me think. And when I say "Awww, that's so sweet" or beautiful, I really mean it. It's not pity or insincerity, it's genuine appreciation for who you are and what you share. So thank you men. You rock. (And speaking of... no, you don't have to be an emotional rock. I like you just the way you are, emotions and all.)

Good night 🌙

Heres What I Like About Men
Here's What I Like About Men
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Guardian45
    Amanda, I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that you have single-handedly restored a lot of men's confidence in the fairer sex!

    Men have become so accustomed to societal beatdowns on a regular basis, that the silent majority of good guys began to question their beliefs.

    You help us to remember that most of us are chivalrous, do care about and love the women in our lives., despite the few famous a-holes who give men a bad name!

    Thank you Amanda! Bravo!
    Is this still revelant?
  • Godofbliss
    It's very rare for a girl to realise this, even rarer for her to admit it, and the rarest is for her to accept and be thankful for it. Your husband is a truly lucky man. I really hope this gets around and women love to acknowledge, if not love, this point of view.
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • TwistedMindz
    I just read the first line of each paragraph (and the rest after)
    You can summarize too! You just go into more detail, thats all. You make things really clear for someone and when you're presented with a summary of something, sometimes there can be a disconnect because you're used to things being explained in detail?
    I thank you for noticing this, because many fail to notice. :)
    • AmandaYVR

      Thanks.
      What did this part mean? "... sometimes there can be a disconnect because you're used to things being explained in detail?"

    • Well i assumed you're used having things explained in detail, like you do yourself. So sometimes when someone summarizes something, it could confuse you? Disconnect in doesn't mean something tech related in this case haha :p

    • AmandaYVR

      i'm not used to having things explained in detail. Kind of an odd thing to say. Because the people talking are usually the ones who decide how much detail to say, and of course that varies across the board based on personality, and gender.
      As I said above, guys really don't have the interest or inclination or patience to talk in detail about some things, esp relaying conversations to the degree that most/many girls do. They find that often more tedious and girls find that often more interesting/pertinent.
      But most (though not all) of the time I like details in order to make informed decisions or conclusions. And in this case, I didn't want to just say "guys are great" because that carries no meaning or weight, in my opinion, the way that explaining why does. And I say this all the time with comments on gag. If someone likes something, one word answer - basically who cares? But a follow-up second sentence or two, suddenly makes it a more rich and full answer.

  • Passinggas
    While I know you put your best into this, given the continuous man-hate saturation bombing of this society and calluses acquired thereof, this while well written comes across as pandering. I guess any attempt is better than nothing is. There is a long road ahead to hoe to undo the severe damage of the past fifty years. This is no reflection on you but only my perception of it all.
    • AmandaYVR

      Read what I just wrote to anonymous male 25-29. Tell me if you still feel that way. He has a different opinion than you. He thinks there were backhanded compliments in there too, which I don't agree, but I did write as the thoughts were in my head, partly because I specifically did not want it to be seen as pandering, but as honest and realistic.

    • Passinggas

      “As I've gotten older I don't tend to look at men as so foreign or in opposition” (your reply to him below) this sums it up really, because while I do accept what you are saying and I am not criticizing but at one point in your life, per quote, you did see men as foreign and the opposition. It took maturity for you to come out of your natural gender bias and discover a third person view, from a perch if you will, out of body. However, while you were in it ankle deep in hormones you could have been a man-hating terror to deal with as far as I know. Unfortunately, the majority are indoctrinated full of hate and the sad part is most accept it so easily and naturally. This truly makes me ponder the human condition and why something that evolved to be a natural complementary form of survival has been destroyed, by social engineering, and so easily. Therefore, while I see so many men on here complimentary of your take, I am fully aware of the process that generated it as if you have transitioned through metamorphosis so now you have wings and are above it.

    • AmandaYVR

      You know, you make a valid point there. And you said is quite eloquently. It is true to some extent. And not in others. Here's how:

      You'll probably say I'm saying this now in response after the fact, so it doesn't count, but I disagree. Besides, no writing is perfect and one can always find things that could have been said better.
      When I am on gag I see patterns, notice trends, look at usernames all the time, see numbers and statistics. It's probably the way I am built. This is just as interestig, if not more, than the comments individually themselves. And I compare this to what I hear and read about in the world, and to my experience and past. Things have changed, are changing. In many ways it doesn't matter to me because I'm beyond dating and in my life married. However I guess it find it interesting from a societal and anthropological perspective. So the word "opposition" is in my head frequently. Things are so contentious on gag. I very rarely get into fights for the sake of it, and I am definitely not a troll, but I will occasionally argue passionately for what I believe in or what I see happening, or that could be better. People can care or be interested or not, whatever. So there are some aspects of dating, and relationships, that endure, will never change, but others that may be a sea change. Sea changes are interesting. And having knowledge in hindsight is of course helpful. But at the same time as I recognize I now benefit from age and hindsight, etc. that I did not have before, it is also true that you cannot dismiss all that I am, or think, as being a result of age. So here's what I see...

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  • Lliam
    Awwww, Amanda. That was so sweet. We men love being appreciated. Sometimes, because of our "stiff upper lip" mentality, we don't openly acknowledge it as much as women do because we think we have to be strong. But we need it as much as women do.
    It's common knowledge that women like to be complimented. They worry a lot about being appreciated. They like being treated like they are special. Men like to feel that way, too. They love it when their woman wants to look her best for them. They feel ten feet tall when their woman slips her hand around his arm when they walk together, as if she thinks he is her knight in shining armor and is proud to be seen with him. They feel manly when asked to open a jar, fix something, lift something, or reach something down from a high shelf. They melt when their woman smiles brightly or looks up searchingly into their eyes. These are all unspoken compliments. But spoken compliments are equally desirable.

    Thank you to those women who make us feel appreciated. It make us love them even more.
  • Obtuse
    I actually lack the ability to compartmentalize and laser focus and summarize and omit details. I see everything as interconnected. It gives me an edge in my field since I can pull from disparate fields and ideas to create very out-of-the-box solutions that are simpler than the rest. But it has huge disadvantages in trying to explain why it works for people since I get tempted to write a 600-page paper (and actually after so many repeated edits to make it as short as possible) on everything ranging from data mining theory to practical applications of software like Photoshop to the psychology of our users to the origins of scanline rasterization and a simplistic view of the computer hardware memory hierarchy to quick and dirty assembly coding techniques from the 80s to dynamic branch prediction and how workflow speed should not be measured in a mechanical way like mouse clicks and keystrokes but how much thought is required to perform an action and so on to proper profiler graph analysis to how associating indirections with inefficiencies is oversimplistic and dogmatic if temporal locality is not accounted for and so forth.

    I envy the guys who can do this as well. Communicating nontrivial ideas is a major difficulty for me since I can't tell what details and connections are irrelevant. I think I'm more like girls in my way of thinking here. I envy the guys too here! :-D Go guys!
  • AllThatSweetJazz
    Man, this is actually really nice.

    For me, it really brings to mind that it’s so hard to pry affection like this from women. Where it does occur, it’s often qualified by negativity eg “little boys” blah blah “real men” blah blah “fuck boys” etc.

    But I appreciate the absence of that here. Thanks.
    • AmandaYVR

      You're welcome. I meant every word of it.

  • SomeGuyCalledTom
    "I like that men have a way of summarizing things"

    The irony of this is that I skipped the first paragraph coz my man brain was like "these personal details are irrelevant to the logical points of discussion!" 😂
    • AmandaYVR

      Lolol. That IS ironic! (And I thought about that as I was writing.)

    • Haha you think while you type-- if you were a novelist they'd say you're a "pantser" 😄

    • AmandaYVR

      Oh interesting. Never heard that before, just looked it up. Yep that's definitely me.
      You can imagine how long my email letters used to be. Editing is excruciating/tedious. Fuss fuss.

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  • I like that my man is his own man. He doesn’t conform to the norms and pressures of conventional masculinity.

    He listens well and communicates effectively.

    He’s loyal af.

    He’s an equal partner, not above cooking and cleaning.

    I love that after 13 years, he still pursues me.

    I love the fact that he respects me and doesn’t try to control me.

    I love his sweetness, pleasantness, and his willingness to be humble and vulnerable.
  • lightbulb27
    Nicely said, you're welcome!

    You aren't Italian are you? I just made Brussels sprouts as well... it's a small world.
    • AmandaYVR

      Nope.
      How do you prepare them? I bake them in the oven for a few mintues, with olive oil, salt and pepper, and sometimes a little balsamic, but yesterday's were plain. They do tend to overcook easily, eh? Those I like the crispy bits too.

    • I like them crispy in the oven as much as possible... in olive oil salt and change up the spices. Right on!

  • doeadeer123
    oh, i have to whole-heartedly agree with the grudges thing! that has proved true many times in my life.
    love that you are appreciating men <3
    • AmandaYVR

      Great!

      Yes, I just witnessed it again today. Men can be quite impressive that way sometimes.

    • yep!

    • AmandaYVR

      I've had some good exchanges with guys on gag I had blocked early on. I unblocked everyone, started over, and many guys were willing to interact with me later. And quite a few of those have actually gone very well, and been interesting (I think for both of us.)

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  • Here's What I Like About Women...
    Women like you exist.
  • jillybeanns
    This is so sweet and I agree with your points! (There’s a few more that I would also add in myself). I’m sure the guys really appreciated this thoughtful Mytake just as I did. 😊
  • Sensmind
    I remember years ago I was having a similar conversation about difference between men and women. She said I have just finished reading "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" (or whatever title is), you should have a read of it" . I said "Was it not just pop psychology?" , she replied "Just try it". I found it made an awful lot of sense but not only that explained it well.
  • Totti94
    It's huge and you understand men much more and better...

    We do these mostly when we happy. The reason for happy is our surroundings... That's women, wife, mother, sister, or daughter...

    For all of them we able to do so...

    It's I could able to say... We try our best for our family and God gifted because we need to do help to woman and lead the family...

    Happy men achieve more better.
    Have a pleasant sleep.
    Good night
  • Aakash_Hangargi
    You used the forbidden word "Females" my god😂

    But nice post thank you
  • I thought I'd come to this myTake to finally see some good wholesome content...

    But I can't relate with this. Saying that men are problem-solvers and all when I know plenty of dudes who aren't like you're describing and I also know a lot of females who are very goal-oriented and specific in their wording.

    It was pretty stereotypical and annoying myTake. Especially when I'm recently dealing with a relationship where the girl is very rational but the guy is the one with none of the abilities that you mentioned.

    Men have a lot of amazing things to offer and I'll forever be grateful for those, but I don't think this myTake necessarily talks about those.
    • You're quite the ball of negativity in this sea of joy.

    • AmandaYVR

      Okay, "Cubster", let's get a few things straight here. By you saying you thought you'd come to see some "good wholesome content" and apparently not finding any, I'm going to conclude that you were looking for some variant of:
      1. Guys who appreciate women who dress modestly, covered without showing skin.
      2. Guys who will gladly wait for marriage before having sex with you. They will also not engage in any sexual activity, such as the solicitation of sexy photos, or masturbating at the though of you.
      3. Guys who don't drink, do drugs, cigarettes, all 'vices' that are hedonstic.
      4. He must not be "an infidel" and should be Muslim like you.
      Did I leave anything out?

      Well what tf does that have to do with my mytake. Yeah, my mytake. You and I have about zero in common. But I"ve observed you for quite some time now. One of the things you've said is you think older females online are not doing "enough" to help guide the younger females to living a proper morally upright, i. e. conservative young lady life - such as mentioned above. And you think "knowledge is power." So I'm goona do that now, give you some advice. But it's not goona be on your terms, it's on mine. Because what I care about is character. And you need a wake-up call, "My Dear", as you like to call people - males, people older than you, etc. Give me a fing break.

      You're harsh, combative, unecessarily antagonistic, even sometimes mean, have called men "cry babies", "trash", love talking about feminism, self-proclaiming you are one. Oh and don't forget "women are impulsive." I'm pretty sure you meant that in regards to sex and them sending out sexy photos, etc., but talk about the pot call the kettle black. Do you ever say anything nice?

      I don't care if you're religious or not, but you have such a strict code of conduct when it comes to these - I'll call them 'Big 4' commandments, but you don't seem to try and apply morality to your own behaviour outside of those contexts.

    • AmandaYVR

      You have said you have very limited relationship experience. And you feel you've been burned. And with all this breadth of knowledge at the age of 19 (if that is your age), you think there's "plenty of dudes who aren't like this" do ya? Well then I guess my entire premise needs to be thrown out the window. Can't both be true, can they.

      I don't buy it, Cubster. I've never seen you compliment a man on gag. But you sure do love it when you pose a question and ask for reassurance and get compliments from them though, don't you? You're lucky they fall for that wo-es me insecurity shtick. Yet you have not one kind word to say about them here, yet again. You choose to criticize me, and that's it. You're spoiled and entitled and narcissistic and a hypocrite. If your really were a good, nice, morally upright and kind religious person, you would learn how to more tactfully, more constructively convey your opinions. This is mine. My opinion, my story to the guys. It wasn't written for you. You are one of these girls who tries to disguise your feelings of competition or antagonism that you have for people. You get enough compliments (on your looks, your insecurity) when you go looking for them. The guys do not. They are seldom publicly (or maybe ever privately) acknowledged for the good in them. But your hypocrisy and lack of compassion does not surprise me. It is how you are. So do me a favour and avoid my questions from now on. I've seen plenty of you and I am not up for trying to teach you. It's really not worth my energy. So kindly take your attitude elsewhere and bugger off. Thank you.

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  • wouterv
    This made my day my week my month maybe even this dissaster of a year thank u
  • izzie_morris
    this is so true! i think men and women are so different and when out together they really balance each other out in a lot of ways
  • loveslongnails
    " I like your ability to compartmentalize ". LOL Not so fast !

    That's the number ONE reason a guy gives to explain why he had sex with someone outside the marriage ! "Honey, it was just a little oral sex. I'd had a few beers, she was really hot and she just wanted to give me a blow job. It's not like I love her (or even know her), it was just a blow job. All the guys got one !! Cmon !!"

    You mean like THAT kind of compartmentalization? :)
    • AmandaYVR

      Good god no. Like, I want to work on one task at a time, compartmentalize. And, in this argument I don't remember all the past stuff you're bringing up (aka 'kitchen sinking it.')

      The sexual stuff you're talking about... I don't know. Not going to tackle that one. I think that's for men to discuss or debate, not me or us pinks. We're not in your brains. But if you want to divulge any of that, be my guest. You think the others who say that are just full of shit, eh? So all the ones who say that are lying to us?

    • Oh no, ... that's how a lot of men think about sex, especially if the sex falls way off in their marriage. The rationalization goes like this: I've been a good provider, make a good living, been an ok husband and father, did all the stuff I was supposed to. But the wife just isn't into sex anymore. I mean, she doesn't even offer to give me a hand job and I'm not going to beg for it. I mean like, she just doesn't seem interested. And she's put on some weight. Of course I love only her, but I need some sex, and I don't mean with myself. "

      So if an easy opportunity comes up, and he takes it, then it's "well, what she doesn't know won't hurt her and I KNOW I still love her and it was JUST about sex, and she wouldn't understand. "

      By the way... every woman I explain that where it hasn't happened says "not my guy". Every woman that is HAS happened to says " if he loved me he wouldn't have done that". So I ask "and the last time you had sex was what... 5 years ago?" I'm not saying this happens to all marriages and there's no way of knowing how often it does but the couple stays married, whether he is found out or not. What we do know is that 30 out of every 1,000 marriages in the USA end in divorce. I would guess that at least 2/3's of them have something to do with cheating, and the other 1/3 with abusive behaviors. If you want to fund a study, I'll do one for you :)

    • AmandaYVR

      Ay yay yay.
      Well thanks for that, Loves. You definitely know some things about marriage/relationships/how men think.
      "I would guess that at least 2/3's of them have something to do with cheating, and the other 1/3 with abusive behaviors" - I would disagree on those numbers, I think the actual numbers are lower, but still significant. You are getting into a very large topic here. I think it is overly simplistic to say that marriage (all relationships) end "have something to do with" cheating. The cheating can be a one-off, or it can happen later once one of both people know that it's going down the plug hole anyway, or it can be a symptom of other issues, such as disconnection, one or both parties changing/growing apart, values and priorities in life no longer aligning (based on new experiences they have out there in the world, over a period of years) and therefore they don't really want to be with each other anymore, living the same life (style.) Lots of things.
      Labelling the demise as cheating is the easy way out - the way to scapegoat the end on one action (although it could be a period of many years, which is a bit of another story. And that certainly happens too, which can just obliterate any future trust.)
      Anyway, I don't really want to muddy up my positive take here. There are so many questions/topics that veer off into anger. I'm a bit full up on those atm.

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  • chris_987
    You should listen to Alyson Armstrong she talk about men in the same way that you do
    • AmandaYVR

      You're right! I hadn't heard of her, checked out a single podcast interview, literally the first click, listened to the whole hour, and I'm hooked. She's great. I don't agree with all of her ideas (that's almost impossible, right) such as the concept of princesses and princes and kings and queens, but I really do relate to her thinking in many ways.
      And the interesting thing was, of all the many links I could have clicked on, I happened across one that 100% applied to my husband and myself (about a mid-life crisis.) He and I made our way through it without the benefit of her or anyone's knowledge, but I agree with everything she said about this. Guess she even wrote a book on it.
      So thanks very much for the recommendation.

    • chris_987

      Yeah well I’m glad I could help, I feel like if everyone thought the way she and you do about the opposite sex, you know like finding things to appreciate about each other rather than finding things to hate on, the world would be full of so much love.

      I also used to watch her workshop when they where free on audible but unfortunately it’s no longer free for me, but she has some really good stuff on audible too.

    • AmandaYVR

      Thank you, I appreciate that. Very much. I agree.

      I don't have Audible but I'll keep that in mind.
      You should check out Radio Public. It's a free app. On there, there is 'Where Do We Begin' by Esther Perel. She is my absolute favourite on this topic of relationships. Her mind is so impressive, I can't even tell you how stimulating and pumped I get listening to her. Her therapy sessions, I am not such a big fan of, what she says to the clients, her lectures and Ted Talks are better, but Where Do We Begin is fascinating audio recordings of her patient sessions, doing these approx. 40 min exerpts from pivotal discussions her clients had. I used to go for long walks, when I was tired of all my thousands of songs in my music library, and just listen to people in therapy with her. Fascinating.

  • I liked it 30,000 years ago when women were all strippers and the men barely had enough mammoth fur to cover our junk.
    The women are all strippers, plus dragons
    The women are all strippers, plus dragons
    • AmandaYVR

      "Strippers', yeah, that's what they were. You know, right next to their poles set up in the caves. Good exercise too.

      You'd probably like George Lucas' famous line to Carrie Fisher on her not feeling 'supported' enough in her wardrobe... "There's no underwear in space." Great line.

    • They had mammoth tusks to use as stripper poles.

    • AmandaYVR

      Well I'm definitely not goona high five or upvote you on that but you definitely get a chuckle 😉

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  • Lanawolf
    Totally agree! Love you guys! Please know that you are appreciated x
  • TadCurious
    Very, very well done. I truly appreciate this, not just for the message conveyed but also for how well it was expressed.
  • standingUP
    Logic over emotion.
    Solution over illusion
    And conclusion over confusion
  • Avicenna
    Excellent Take, very thoughtful. Especially agree about problem solving.
  • COMMODOREII
    Your husband is so lucky. 😭😭😭😭😭😭

    😋😋

    Thanks love 😂
  • spartan55
    If my ex would have subscribed to even 25% of this take I'd likely still be a married man... 🙄
  • cereal_muncher
    Yo I genuinely really appreciate this, thanks for the reassurance mate.
  • Ratmuffin
    Thats very sweet and thoughtful of you. Thanks. I need a cigarette now.
  • Bogoboj
    This is such a nice and positive message. I thank you for your consideration of us men.🤗
  • J2ohhhhh
    This is how I have to find out that nobody is impressed by being able to write my name in the snow.
  • BlessedDaddy
    So: We get right to the point which is the point. We don't need to hear 95% of what you say and we know what to do. We would rather beat each other up then stay mad. And we compartmentalize so we'll, we can hide areas of our brain from an MRI just to think we will forget our anniversary and your birthday, and we drowned out all the noise helping our ability to focus. We also are bigger and stronger than you. We dont believe openly wanting sex being vaulnerable, it's more like the equivalent asking you if you want to go have fun at an amusement park for a few hours. The stubble and messed up hair is a gift from God, you bought the boxers and the mug. And we don't mind being an emotional rock. As long as your there when we need the true rock in our lives, the woman in it.
  • cth96190
    It is so unusual for a female to say anything positive about men.
  • Meropatrick
    I agree with all the above except for the grudge thing. I mean girls hold grudges for petty things that is for sure. And they perceive weird things to be an insult. And their rage about it is irrational. but guys do hold grudges. Especially if we get maimed badly. Dont expect to walk all over a guy and then next day he will be just ok. Guys who get in physical altercation and get injured can be quite bitter about it. Its a known facts in some countries that guys who get rejected by women get so bitter to the extent of throwing acid at the woman who rejected him.
    although definitely i would prefer for a guy to hold a grudge against me and not a girl. Because at least a guy will be mad at me for a reasonable reason
    • AmandaYVR

      Sure, agreed.
      I've seen evidence of guys getting over small (i. e. petty) things quicker/easier.
      My theory is that because they are not as emotionally upset by minor conflicts, and their brains are more compartmentalized to not attach emotion and meaning to so many things, they don't feel as triggered by memories, the five senses. Some also even relish conflict (debating/arguing for the fun of it) so it's not such a big deal to be around people they've had a conflict with. And females tend to prioritize social harmony more than individuality and independence.
      These are broad stroke generalizations, I know. But I speak in majorities, not minorities.
      As far as major events, feeling wronged, betrayed... I would characterize these as no different than females. Everyone's very affected.
      And p. s. females rarely go out and commit acts of violence or seek this type physical of revenge. Men have the almost-monopoly on that.

  • certifiedalphafemale
    And this is the exact reason why I love my boyfriend! 🙂<3
  • Yes. Many men gets right to the problem and wants it solves immediately.
  • msc545
    Thank you!!!
  • coolhandroo
    Your husband is a lucky man
  • Nilanjan
    I will do pemectomy on your husband
  • Anpu23
    Thank you, this was lovely.
  • QueenOfBaku
    Perfect 👍 agreed
  • coolbreeze
    Interesting take
  • mrArcher
    Thank you.
  • Anonymous
    She's just really horny due to quarantine...
  • Anonymous
    Lol at how many guys liked this.
    • Guanfei

      Yeah, strangely, when someone isn't a bitch with us and tell us we're evil, worthless and scum, we tend to appreciate it.
      Who would've thought?

    • Anonymous

      @Guanfei Weak people enjoy being told they're right and good all the time. You're right yes.

    • Guanfei

      Normal people. Only shit people like you love to bring other people down. Go be a sad bitch somewhere else.

  • Anonymous
    why do you bother writing a mytake about what you like about men if you're just going to qualify everything with the things you don't like about men? it feels very disingenuous
    • AmandaYVR

      "Disingenuous"? This is the antithesis of disingenuous. You know what would be? - You men, you're all perfect, I've loved all of you right from the start, you've never given me any grief, you're all equal, and your personalities are the same, and I've never had any conflict or differences of opinion with you, and we totally undertand each other all the time, and relationships are easy, and we'll all live happily ever after behind a white picket fence. Oh and women are perfect too.

      What are you, one of these new generation 'everyone gets a trophy kids' who can't handle anything other than unequivocal and total praise, needs only positive affirmation or they fall apart, hides behind pseudonyms and avatars, and thinks everyone is against them?

      I'm flawed, you're flawed, we're all flawed, and then we have differences of opinion, and often wish whatever each other is doing would be done another way. But somehow we figure out how to compromise. That's what it is to be in relationships. To notice the differences, but appreciate them. You accept people for their differences, the things that sometimes make you crazy, and you make jokes about them and yourself, just to make it all a little more bearable, and hopefullly fun.

      I wasn't being mean or snarky. I was being realistic and honest and very, very complimentary.

    • I second Amanda on this one. Sack up dude

    • i agree entirely. the anon was pretty rude tbh

  • Anonymous
    Thanks for writing this. It's refreshing to see a woman who will say some positive things about men in this day when it is so unfashionable to do so, even though, as seems to be your usual style, you couldn't resist turning at least a few of them into backhanded compliments. But they are appreciated nonetheless.
    • AmandaYVR

      Oh, you saw them as backhanded compliments? I've been thinking about this.
      My gut reaction is I think it's something else.
      I wrote the above quickly and spontaneously as it came to me, and this is how it organized in my head, naturally. I knew that I was saying some of those things (and I did briefly consider not typing them), but I actually loathe spending a lot of time editing, reworking; it's boring and tedious, and I used to be pretty fine with that but not anymore. I want to get on with things, get them done. It's more enjoyable to me to write fast and hit submit. So what I write is honest, as it is in my head. But yeah, I do carefully consider, 'Did I say it clearly, accurately?' With brevity, I'm still trying to work on. That one's tough.

      I know what you're saying about my writing. But I left them in and here's why. I feel it would be dishonest or insincere if I didn't. Or pandering or glossing over things or like a sycophant. And maybe you know me enough by now, I don't know, that I hate surface shit. I do this in person too. When someone asks me a question, esp if it is very personal or direct q about how I feel about them, they know that I will be honest, and detailed, and they can trust I am not just skating over the surface of things, but wanting to acknowledge the complexity and the thought process, and I have arrived at this conclusion or opinioin, having considered it all up to this point. It's probably both a blessing and a curse.

    • AmandaYVR

      As I've gotten older I don't tend to look at men as so foreign or in opposition, with differing goals to women/girls. They are different than me in thinking, quite often, but not nearly as different as I used to see them up to my early 20s, or whenever. So when I say something, for instance, about men being so succinct, not giving as many details (especially of conversations, the minutia of all that), I mean it both as an observation and initial frustration in the past, but also an acceptance and respect that these differences are inherent, will always exist, and can be of benefit. I truly now believe men are not as bogged down by the details of such things, minutia (personaity differences aside, of course.) And I think girls need that, to balance them out. So I mention it to show the full scope of my thinking, a fuller picture, where it began and where I am now, appreciating these differences in men. Cause I honestly don't need more of me, and I get along really well with a couple of girlfriends but I get them, they are similar. I enjoy the differences in men. It's a relief in some ways.

      I'll ponder what you said some more, but I honestly feel these things I said weren't meant with criticism.

    • Anonymous

      It has nothing to do with organization or taking the time to edit, and everything to do with your opinion of men, and a bit of dishonesty. I have just noticed after reading many of your posts that you seem incapable of saying anything positive about men without also expressing your disdain for them. Perhaps an example would help illustrate.

      Women are amazing, and here's why:

      - Women can be beautiful, though it seems most today are overweight.

      - Women are naturally nurturing, although it seems today's women have largely lost that trait.

      - Women are very good communicators, although they have a tendency to talk way too much and lose their audience after a while.

      - Women can sometimes be "helpful" when you're trying to organize an event.

      Can you see how that feels a little dishonest? Don't write a mytake about what you like about men and then use it as an opportunity to express all the things you dislike about them, or give the reader reason to think you don't mean what you say.

    • Show All
  • Anonymous
    I think men dont get appreciated enough. There is so many things i love about guys. You don't have to be the typical masculine male, while I do like this type of man, he has disadvantages as well against a more sensitive man and vice versa. The most important thing is that you be true to yourself. Be comfortable with who you are as a person.
  • Anonymous
    Next time you had a random thought and thought maybe you should write about it, just don't.
    • AmandaYVR

      I thought about removing this but I'll leave it up for now I think so that people can see.
      Yep, not every comment on a post can be positive or supportive. But if you don't like this one, have no postiive takeaway whatsoever, you really are an asshole aren't you. A cowardly, anonymized asshole. But look! Gag seems to have added a Block feature to anonymized commenters. How cool. So guess what I'm doing riiiight now... and I never have to see you again. Noice.

  • Anonymous
    Fuck. You've restored my faith in women. Thank you.
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