My friends with benefits tried to hit on my best friend?

[Anonymous]

So had a friends with benefits situation, I don't have feelings for him but i got a screen shot of him trying to hit on her on Fb. I at first told him I thought that was crossing some lines, that idc who he sees but close friends are just disrespectful. He told me "you don't own the bitch or me" told me to "stfu" and flipped out. I'm DONE. Am I overreacting or is this really some boundary crossing?

Updates

+1 y

So done w this guy, I knd of feel like our situation needed to end along time ago, its been going on 3+ years. We have been good about communication, he knows if I see or talk to other people and vice verse, so it made me upset he went behind my back to get at her, knowing that's my best friend who is engaged. Plus now that this has happened, he's showing a whole new side of himself that I don't like. He is texting non stop about "so what yo don't want to see me' and blowing my phone up. So done

[pink_love]

I think his response was rude. But i think that you also don't really have a right to say anything regarding who is seeing. Thats apart of being in a friends with benefits situations. You are friends, but with the added benefits of sexual activity. However, if one of those people in the friends with benefits finds someone that they feel they are compatible with the other should be happy for them as they would be for any other friend. So if this was just a guy friend who met and found your friend thats a girl someone that they are interested in seeing, then you would be happy for them, correct? Same has to apply here. This is my opinion on the situation at least.

I do feel he could've been more respectful in the way he explained this to you.

[Asker]

So does it make a difference if the only knowing he has of her is that she is my friend and he's seen her on my fb? She wasn't ok w him hitting her up, she's not interested in him, she has a fiance.

[pink_love]

he shouldn't be hitting on someone thats engaged. But hitting on a friend of yours, unless you have made clear boundaries before starting this friends with benefits. stating that friends, co workers, or whatever are off limits then its fair game.

I must say, he response was completely uncalled for. And if he knew the friend was engaged then he's just making himself look foolish. I think this experience has taught you a lot about his moral character, clearly isn't something you agree with so maybe its time to consider moving forward.

[SillyQuirks_]

Depends on your relationship honestly.
Crossing lines in an unemotionally attached situation, no. BUT, how he talked to you... definitely crossing some major lines. Never let a man talk to you like that. Never let a man refer to another person as a bitch, especially a friend.

[Asker]

That was def a final straw. He's just super disrespectful and not first time he has gotten an attitude w me

[shortmacchiato]

I think what was most out of line was his reaction, someone who refers to a girl as "the bitch" is a disgusting person, get rid of him. And maybe you should tell your friend, I'd hate to go out with someone who called me "the bitch" behind my back.

[Asker]

I sent her everything he texted, he doesn't need to talk like that about her.

[bDizzie]

Your reaction was out of line but his reaction was WAY out of line!
Go find someone who wants more than just friends with benefits

[BertMacklinFBI]

you obviously care if you think its disrespectful he goes for a friend. im not bashing btw, no hate! :D

[Asker]

It's just rude. I personally would not have approached any of his friends like that, same with family members. Just BC there is not a commitment doesn't mean there aren't certain boundaries. She thought it was creepy and she herself is engaged.

[BertMacklinFBI]

obviously I didn't know all the details, but in a more general standpoint, it should not have mattered if no attachments were truly made. but in your case its different. he hit on an engaged person.

[Arab_Cutie1033]

How about you leave the guy alone and let him do as he wishes. He's clearly not your boyfriend (both of you agreed) and if he by any chance likes your friend let him be. Don't be jealous.

[Iron_Lions]

I agree with @Arab_Cutie1033. If you want him to be more than a friend tell him. Don't beat around the bush. That's for children.

[been_waiting]

"you down own the bitch or me"

he sounds like an asswipe. I wouldn't have any contact with him..

[Anonymous]

That's why I am against FWB. Your reaction is no different from if you guys were dating...

[Drooogie4]

He's just your fwb. Not boyfriend. He can do that.