How do you get into a guarded man's heart? (Page 3)
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Been there done that. Only he can fix himself. NOTHING you can do. People do not change unless they want to and comit to it. My guy is now 42 been this way his entire life. Hence no kids or wife. He doesn't really want to change.
Have you tried cooking an amazing meal for him? I see a lot of women here making that suggestion.
Show you can be trusted. Or try to find out what happened to him.
Yes, men go through things in life too. Usually it's from trusting someone too easily,
my crush showed like he likes me he is a nerd so i thought he might be shy... he told me that he is not sure if he sees me as a friend or not bc at first we were only friends.. now i have said that whatever he will say anymore I won't be thinjing that he is flirting ( bc I am sick of him ) and that I am just a friend...
Why are you sick of your crush?
I don't fully understand what's going on.
Did he say he only thinks of you as a friend? Maybe you should open up to him about your feelings. Do you think he even knows how you feel?
He can't read your mind. So speak up!
i have told him that i like him
bc I gathered atll the signs and it was obvious sth was going on
we texted daily , lots in common we clicked
went on 2 dates
1st. I was so madly into him and open about my crush to him he nothing at all.. guarded
2dt. i was the one who madw him ask me out and he was surprised i wanted to go out with him.. it was like we were only friends tho when i told him a story about my one athlete crush who did canoo and i liked that unusual sport after 20min he was like i am aick of the gym i will do canoo.. not a coincidence he gets jeleaus easily i believe... then we talked a lot about his cusin
and he told me that he is coming from another city so we could all go out and i could meet him.. he told me i had similar personality with his cusin who is a guy and immediately he was like "but he is fatter than me " (he meant himself)
and he told me 2 things e could do together so he seemed wanting to go out with me
Maybe there are some layers to work through. So far he seems like a decent person. I think you should stop counting the number of dates, and start spending time with him.
Dates are stupid anyway. Spend time together. Go walk in the park, or go jogging, or suggest something you think you would both enjoy. Spend some life with him. Maybe that's what you should be counting instead...
Also, it's good to randomly stop by their house sometime.
I mean, a few dates together doesn't mean anything when you're spending your life with someone. Try falling asleep with him on the phone, or texting him in the morning when you wake up. Let him know you're thinking about him.
And if that sounds like too much work, well...
If you want something worthwhile, you have to earn it...
And so does he.
we have already talked many nights etc. . . and he started sending me goind night 😘😘 text without us even talking and then happened what i told u on the 1 answer ... he denied everything and said its just his way... he had sended me a romantic song and told me to look at the lyrics and when i told him about that he said he just liked the lyrics... the lyrics tell about a girl who is perfect etc... wtf
Usually food I find! The old saying that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach always rings true for me. I'm a pretty good cook.. Men seem to love being pampered with lots of good food and an attentive woman over dinner 😊
show I'm trust compassion and understanding. try to find out what the root of his fear is and help him let his guard down while understanding that he might get upset or scared but it's not against you personally it's because of the fear and what has happened in the past. just stay strong and confident that you can help him
guys knows who to open up to. You just need be patient with him and not constantly harass him. once he feels a connection and is comfortable with you, opening up is not hard
Do not make promises! Don't fail him. Intuitively provide for his needs. Show him you can be trusted by opening up your self completely. Pick a most awkward event and spill.
I don't try, I am not a stripper anymore, you only care when you want their money, let him stay guarded.
The guy who downvoted wants women to play his head games whaap whaap whaaaaap.
Says the woman who's openly talking about ripping guys off for their money like a straight hoe. No wonder a real man most likely don't wanna fuck with you.
@cerealcy93 I never ripped anyone off when I was stripping, never stole. But if he doesn't like me I don't get paid, that's the only time I care about his walls or shield or whatever the fuck, and I'm fine I've had enough fuck, I exhausted and bored.
Smile and offer a positive outcome in life, start talking about deep things at first, however don't go in too deep just small things and build up until he trusts you completely and opens up on his own
Be sweet to him. Show you actually care and don't just be as fickle and most women are these days. I know be cause I'm very cautious because getting hurt sucks. I stopped dating for a year. Still trying to figure it all out but.. really showing you care.
Keep closer to him whenever he needs you, start to build enormous trust between each other, then play the tricks of girls that fell down any man sexy and lovely.
the only key to get in is being your true self trust and time dont try to pick the lock he will feel that and be even more graded relax time is time that has no time
and spelling you have to spell right to LOL
I would not do that. Why would I do that in the first place. I would rather be patient enough to wait for the man to approach me rather than go after a guarded man.
then you're probably going to keep finding guys that just disappear after a little while.
@cerealcy93
I would rather wait for someone who would be serious to me than a person who has a guarded heart already. I would not want to be a second choice anyway.
Too many suggestions sound like there coming from a these-are-my-issues p. o. v. Basically you show him you won't put up with his b. s. as well as not leaving at the first sign of trouble. However, if cheating is his way of pushing you away, then that a whole different ballgame. over all, he's still responsible for his actions no matter what they are. And there should be consequences.
Sometimes it is not even worth it. This is my personal experience, but even if you go the extra mile to gain his approval even in the relationship, yet he doesn't acknowledge it, give your break and leave them. It is no disorder that can be treated, it's simply his fundamental character which may not change.
Honestly I'm like this and I've only opened up to one person and it was because she talks to me about her problems, didn't push me to talk about things when I didn't want to yet, she showed she really cared, and it did take time before I finally opened up to her but I couldn't be happier now
Spend more time together and talk about things you both like. Joke around, laugh, and be friendly. It's a time thing. If he's with someone he likes the only two things work: time and consistency.
Also depending on what it is lightly push till he slowly lets your in and you have his trust.
you can't exactly do anything exept be yourself anf have mutual respect and trust... it just happenes with time. can't be guaranteed...
maybe you don't. people's personal walls are their own problems to solve... and it has nothing to do with gender.
Ya don't! Poor fellow. Let him choose when/if he wants to share.
be patient. love them no matter what. don't tell them but show them that you are not like everyone else. and wait. lots and lots of wait