My boyfriend broke my apartment door after an argument?

[Anonymous]

I don't usually post my issues but I honestly have no idea where to turn. my boyfriend and I got in a fight. He said something that got me a bit upset, so out of anger I left the living room of my apartment and went into my bed room. I locked the door because he upset me and needed a few min to collect myself before talking. Before I know it he was at the door knocking. The knocking seemed more forceful after a while and before I knew it the door flung open and came off the hinges. I kicked him out after because I was so upset. He said it was an accident but I don't know. He has been posessive in the past, but he has had it under control for a while. We are both not perfect, but i dont know if this is a warning sign and I'm too blinded by love, or if i'm over thinking this whole thing. I love him dearly, I just dont know what do do.

[Anonymous]

''I love him dearly'' No you don't, you've just confused egoic love with real love. Many people make this same mistake, and it's why they become blinded to such actions and remain in bad relationships.

Love does not involve any fights period, NONE. Egoic love involves possessiveness, anger, control, ownership, lust, and the two people confuse the ups and downs, and the seductive chemicals produced from the drama, and the making up, as love. The ego sees desire as need, and makes you think something that isn't actually true.

No one accidentally knocks a door from it's hinges. This was a major warning sign.

[Anonymous]

He should have controlled himself better. Relationships can be hard on young men who often lack the emotional tools to deal with problems that can spring up in a relationship.
You should definitely be on your guard and he should apologise, fix your door and try to do better. Remember a breaking a door is not the same as hitting you. Tell tale signs of a potential abuser are usually a need to control and manipulate you and then violence after that. If he's trying to manipulate and control you that's the first red flag walk away.

[Cmasterson]

Honestly he does seem to have anger issues, but as long as he hasn't been abusive, physically or emotionally. you can give him the benefit of a doubt, make him fix your door first of all and tell him if he can't respect your decisions and words when you need to collect yourself he can't go act all barbaric, he is not entitled just becausehes your boyfriend to do this.

[Vmm90]

I would say it is a red flag, if he can get that angry to break your door off then you don't know where it could escalate to. Possessiveness is not good, because it could lead to controlling behaviour as well. Be careful, I know you said you love him but you don't want it to escalate.

[lovelyhoneybones]

Breaking a door off the hinges is NOT an accident. This dude has some anger issues and might want to get those sorted out. If you're afraid he's going to put his hands on your or do something crazy, it's time to leave.

[linds34]

It's a big warning sign & time to be single or find a new guy. You deserve a guy who wouldn't be violent & scary like that.

[TadCurious]

Red flag alert. Especially when you combine the physical destructive violence with the "he has been possessive in the past." It's those controlling, possessive guys that oftentimes end up battering women.

[willsme]

Call the police for destruction of property and breaking the peace

[Chanel1981]

Time to let that one go, that's scary!

[Humbledman74006]

Big warning... doesn't get much plainer

[1truekhaleesi]

Big red flag.