Has catcalling and making inappropriate comments to girls become socially acceptable?

Question

Over the last two years or so, I’ve really noticed that it seems to be much more common for guys to catcall women, including myself, and/or make inappropriate sexual remarks when just walking past us, driving past us, etc. For example, I was walking home the other night, I was wearing a white dress, there was a 20-somethingish guy walking behind me, and then he comes up beside me and says “I like your dress,” I said thank you, then he says “yeah, and I like that I can see your panties through it!” I said “Excuse me?” He said “yeah, your panties are hot” then walked off! I’d like to say this doesn’t happen often to me, but it does! And honestly, I don’t like it. I mean, what do they think, we’re going to sleep with them or something?

Now before I get bombarded with angry men saying I’m making a huge generalization, I know that most men have much better manners than that and don’t do things like that, I even once had a guy come to my defence when some others were making loud kissing noises at me and tell them to knock it off. It’s also possible that because I was overweight until about two years ago guys weren’t taking any notice of me and now they are, but it just seems like overall the men that do catcall are much less inhibited about it, almost like being disrespectful to women is no big deal. What do you think!

DianaWest · Accepted Answer

oh hon, i asked a similar question and i got a few men whining about how it's their right or some shit. like it's their freedom of speech to harass women and make them feel scared and threatened. i think **some of them think it's no big deal, but it is, and i don't like this shit, especially when a guy is being a persistent jerk when i clearly don't need him in my face.

the only advice i can give you is to try and avoid being somewhere alone at night (because then you may have to deal with worse than just persistent jerks with big mouths). and when you are out and about during the day, just ignore them. that's what i do, and then they get all hurt and start whining. maybe if roles were reversed, some men wouldn't be as happy. honestly, if a man is harassed by a woman he has no interest in, will he be content when she comes up to him and starts commenting things like "hmmm, i like the colour of your panties."

Astraea · Accepted Answer

It's not new. I think I was 11 the first time it happened. I couldn't even tell you how many times I've been catcalled and groped. I try to stay positive and not generalize but it's hard... this is one reason why I despise these whiny bitch guys who go on about how hard they have it and how women have no problems.

Cyber_Ghost · Accepted Answer

I don't cat call females. I never have. To me it's just fucking stupid. However, let me point out the hypocrisy of women. Women hate being cat called, yet they do it themselves. Women cat call at me on a fairly regular basis. You're no better. And in comparison to me, actually worse. Also, let's not leave out the fact that some women actually LOVE to be cat called, it is very flattering to them so as long as it is done in a respectable way. This movement needs to die, because it is a contradictory joke.

How about instead, we protest rude behavior that go outside of respect?

GetzRekt · Accepted Answer

I don't think that it is socially acceptable, no, on the basis that I don't know anyone personally who does that, nor do I see it happening on anything but an extremely rare basis. So maybe it's a thing about where you live.

I honestly don't give a shit about some random person walking down the street, certainly not enough to want to pass comment. I might look but if I do it's brief and I'm on with my day. I would like to think that most guys are the same. We all have our own lives to live.

Anonymous · Answer

I know I’m gonna get some backlash for this and I kinda hate saying this but in this particular case I feel the need to place blame on the feminist movement. Feminism is a great thing for women (and honestly most of the time men) but it has drawbacks. Like any movement there are moments that go to far and feminism being a movement that claims to support at least over half of the human population there are bound to be some pretty powerful and long lasting missteps. I personally think that the push towards “policing” male behavior is one of them. Most guys are raised by mothers and already taught not to do things like catcalling as a child and as a result the vast majority of men don’t do it. Or at least they didn’t in the past. However, looking at recent policy changes like netflix’s Eye contact rule (targeting most likely a small minority of men but effecting the majority) the barometer for what is and isn’t socially acceptable has been distorted and many men no longer have a frame of reference for what is and isn’t socially acceptable. It may seem straightforward to girls but when a guy is left knowing if he says nothing she’ll assume he’s uninterested and move on he’s forced into some kind of behavior. But what behavior? When even simply looking is a possible career ender everything is equally dangerous. So your options are do nothing and go be single forever or risk it all doing essentially whatever you want. There’s no guide book just an bottomless pit of often contradictory advice. I’m not providing an excuse for dudes nor do I think this is feminism’s burden to correct but this is the environment we live in today. And when there’s no clear direction more and more people will stumble into behaviors once seen as extremes.

Servus09 · Answer

Women want male attention, but only if it's from the right guys. This is why a lot of men don't approach or talk to women on the street at all anymore. Women have set the precedent that you have to be hot just to give them a compliment, otherwise, it's sexual harassment.

Women in the west are all entitled and men are demonized for everything. We can't even treat boys like they are boys anymore because women believe it's sexist to teach gender roles. Yet as soon as their maternal clock starts ticking they all go from being strong independent women to wannabe stay-at-home moms. You've heard it before, "Where have all the good men gone?"

As always, women are completely absolved of all responsibility for their actions. Even you seem to be unaware that if you dress as a sexual object by wearing a see-through dress, men are going to see you as such.

That's the thing though, isn't it? You're not stupid. You know this gives you power over men and because you're a typical narcissistic western female you enjoy exercising that power over men.

bobbywiz79 · Answer

I believe based on my observations that younger generations seem to show less respect to everyone, especially women. I think it is sad, and I hope to raise my children in a more respectful manner. I know not all younger people are disrespectful, but I have encountered a high percentage of disrespectful young people. Don't get me wrong, compliments to a woman are absolutely ok. But lewd comments and random dick pics (a trend I really don't understand) is disrespectful, and I wish people (young or old) would show more class.

Jon_25 · Answer

It is not okay.

But unfortunately, in today's society it has become acceptable. And frankly, some girls are asking for it. I mean you can't go out half naked and expect thirsty guys to not call you out.
But some boys dish it out to every girl, and neither should happen. It's a mutual problem, and it ought to stop.

But as long as some girls dressing like sluts to be "beautiful" is "appropriate"
Some boys behaving like assholes to be "cool" is "appropriate"

And I have a feeling it's only going to get worse.

Has catcalling and making inappropriate comments to girls become socially acceptable?

rjroy3 · Answer

To be fair, that example wasn't really cat calling. Just making a comment in passing. Kind of rude, but not catcalling.
If he was yelling out to you saying "Hey ma! Come over here!" that'd be something else.

But yes it's always been around, to varying degrees. How acceptable it is depends on what's said, the area and time it occurs. Like if you're out on a certain side of town on the weekend it's more to be expected. I live in a beach town where that is somewhat commonplace. Girls will shout out to guys, guys will shout out to girls. It's just a thing. Some people can be creepy about it, just like anything else. But so is life.

Jason_Bridges · Answer

What most guys dont understand is it isn't the fact of expressing to a woman she's beautiful and desireable that makes cat calling so disgusting and degrading, its the manner in which its done, i mean really though, shouting and whistling from across the street? Pleas the average dog gets more respectable afftection then that. The only good cat calling may do is be a blatent and obvious way for women to know just who and how high of a percentage of men are dirtbags, and to most definetly stay the hell away from them

Elaine_17 · Answer

The fact that most of the woman in the girl's section of the opinions are giving polite responses, and the men's are somewhat full of anger and insults tells me more about our society than our society itself. It truly does feel like a battle of the sexes. What has our world come to that the men cannot understand what the woman here wants is in good reason? Not to feel sexualized on the streets no matter what she wears. For all I know, her dress can be flowy and free instead of skin tight, and a solid white color.

Sjeggy · Answer

so... what did he say? he complimented your dress and remarked that it is see through? i understand that being catcalled by horny 40 year olds that tell you how and where they want to fuck you is uncomfortable. Is it not censorship if they aren't allowed to speak their mind?

i think actually nowadays it is the opposite given that i got called out for holding the door open (for both men and women). i got called a sexist pig.

i do not mean to make less of what you say or anything. feel free to discuss with me if you want :)

FunkyMonkee · Answer

These days? Not that I know of! You're not even allowed to LOOK AT one without risking a jail term or law suit!!
As for the cartoon, in the first place, it's not done with marrying the girl as a short term prospect! it's only a roundabout way of giving her a compliment from a distance! What are the chances we'll EVER see her again so, what's the harm? BIG DEAL!! So, you spend who knows how much of the rest of your life dealing with the emotional trauma of knowing that SOME guy thinks you're incredibly attractive!! A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH!! What a TERRIBLE thing to say to someone!! HOW do you EVER put UP with it? The emotional scars MUST be HORRENDOUS!! Would you like it better if he called you an ugly, old whore? Just think of marrying him as revenge for him whistling at you!
Secondly, guys have been doing it it for WELL OVER 100 years and I kinda doubt it'll ever stop.

AlphaDM23 · Answer

Honestly that doesn’t happen around my area nor have I seen it in my country often. If a guy catcalled a girl here they’d be in for it if she didn’t like it😂 but I see plenty of videos online showing it as proof and I have friends from foreign country’s who deal with it and hate it. It does happen sometimes when girls go to clubs happened to me but that only happens around the club area and that’s to be expected. I do know that my friends catcall on guys when their in different towns or city😂 they usually seem flattered or joke around. Which would be my response if I got catcalled but I don’t have to deal with it all the time so I think I would have a different point of view if I was in your shoes.

passinby · Answer

Who the hell does this? I have never seen this other than some women giving me sht. I think that all of you attention deficit starved women are imagining this sht to get attention. Enough already with this bull$hit. If anything is changing, more and more men are just looking the other way.

geraldjo · Answer

THIS IS SO DISRESPECTFUL... All men who do this should be ashamed and most men think that its acceptable but cat calling women is here in our society but its not here to stay since it just objectifies women to a lower degree and stupid men always do it all the time

krity · Answer

I mean... is this really a big deal? So some jerk said something, so what? The world is filled with people who will say things we don't like.

I feel like society today is far too sensitive and dare I say, snowflake - there are no safe spaces in the world. Yes, you will hear things you don't like. And yes, you have to learn to shrug it off!

I get catcalled a bit at work, especially if I've just done a long shift and my top is sticking to my chest - I don't get offended by the unwanted attention I shrug it off

I think you should probably look in the plus side, take the interest as a compliment and ignore the crude delivery and carry on with your day. I highly doubt this is happening so much it actually affects your life

dragonfly6516 · Answer

I can't remember anyone ever complaining about it before 2018. Sure it could get annoying, but women found it flattering when and where I grew up.

But when I was growing up, we had something called "modesty". if a woman was catcalled, she was ether dressed "slutty", or was naturally just drop dead gorgeous.

If you advertise, potential customers will ask how much. Showing skin is for attracting a mate.

LegendarySir · Answer

It's actually the opposite. Nowadays catcalling is more frowned than ever. I don't agree with catcalling and making inappropriate comments, and I never have, but it's reached the point when even trying to flirt courteously with a woman is seen as harassment.
To be honest, what I've noticed is women being more lewd towards men. I've experienced things myself that would be very frowned upon had the genders been reversed.

Mellissa80 · Answer

I don't know about it becoming socially acceptable or not, but it shouldn't. I lived my life in a modern capital city where young men were behaving this way, it is really uncomfortable and nasty, but there is nothing to do more than ignoring them. I'm afraid that it started to develop to things more than catcalling.

dsampath · Answer

I personally have never met any woman who married a guy who catcalled her. When I was single I would go up to women I found attractive and start a conversation and make my interest known respectfully, and if I get turned down, oh well, on to the next one. I developed a thick skin in the process, and eventually I met my fiancee. You can't be crass, but you can't wait for one to come to you either. You have to take a chance.

Anonymous · Answer

Yo, a guy told you that he could see your panties through your dress... don’t you think you should be more embarrassed about how your panties are on display for everyone in the dress you wore? That’s definitely important info to consider.

Cat calling is harmless and irrelevant, just keep walking because 90% of the time the guys are all bark and no bite. Sexual assault or threats of sexual assault should be taken seriously.

Rodgerinho · Answer

Outside the bedroom, anything dripping sexual intent and need should only ever be whispered into the ear. There's no room for loud catcalling in public. Classless behaviour.

In the bedroom, every good girl needs to know exactly how badly she's wanted, how deep an effect she has, and how little control her man has over himself, when with her. Whispered, moaned or yelled, the time is there to say any raw, primal, hungry expressions that come to mind.

Exterminatore · Answer

To make it more realistic if this is your view Chang the word marry to f*ck. I would hope no girl would want to marry anyone who was passing by in a car regardless of what they were doing. It would make more sense.

Cat calling is just a guy complimenting you. I don’t think girls should be mad about it. If a girl feels objectified as a sex object how many guys has she objectified as a handyman, human ATM, or sperm donor?

On the note of objectification most men would give their left nut to be objectified sexually. I personally would take that as a compliment not a dehumanization of me.

Bottom line is it’s just an obnoxious way of giving a compliment.

SGL69 · Answer

It's okay to feel the way you do. I personally don't do cat calls. I do get a thought in my head about how beautiful a woman looks but I don't say or do anything to show disrespect to them. Of course I'm shy around women and second I was taught to respect women.

BeMeanToGirls · Answer

Women sowed the seeds of their own destruction when they collectively shunted well-behaved men for boisterous, chest-beating, loud-mouthed, neck tattooed scumbags.

You get what you got. Too bad females can't accept responsibility for their choices. Now they're just stuck with men progressively becoming more and more disrespectful toward them.

Breed with only good men now and you will see a difference in 10 years.

Anonymous · Answer

Hey, this really inspired me to make a mytake about this! This is the mytake: Why do some men find it socially acceptabe to catcall or any kind of street harassment? ↗ eptabe-to-catcall-or-any-kind-of

I don't think this is socially acceptable. If it was the other way round, women catcalling men, they wouldn't like it!

AydenHazor · Answer

It's definitely NOT socially acceptable, but it is unfortunately fairly common. I don't know about your area, but unfortunately with Trump in office in the US, a lot of those who do it feel empowered by someone who was on record being completely inappropriate being president, almost as if it gives them carte blanche to be complete jerks and the world should be ok with it.

Shadow44 · Answer

It's never been acceptable. It's just done by the same minority of assholes who just couldn't give a shit. They tend to do it a lot and more often then guys who have manners which is why you don't notice it a lot.

A-man-22 · Answer

Catcalling only happens after clubs or bars. No guy in his right mind would catcall in broad daylight. Alcohol and party spirit have a lot to do with it.

Women make inappropriate comments to men all the time it's just noticed more by women as they are more insecure.

Anonymous · Answer

I bet it would be fun, next time you are with a group of your girlfriends to mess with some guy walking alone, whistle at him, yell “I do you so hard you don’t even know!” And shit like that... if I could magically turn into a girl for 24 hours I’d likely end up on the news, ha

TisforTori · Answer

It’s been “okay” a lot longer than that. But the interesting part is when the cat callers are questioned about the women in their own life being spoken to that way they mostly all agree it would upset them.

kaylaS91 · Answer

... yes.
As the demographics of both the west coast as well as the east coast change and a certain culture becomes far more populous, the idea of what once was seen as inappropriate behaviour (especially in respect to women) is changing as well.

AaronKrieger · Answer

Catcalling in general annoys me. If you want to express on how you find a girl attractive then compliment her without it being sexual or you whistling in the process.

Anonymous · Answer

It’s becoming LESS socially acceptable. They nastiest comments and groping in my life has always come from men born in the 60s & 70s who all think they’re Burt Reynolds.

XenoViirus · Answer

Growing up where I did, I've never seen a guy actually be courteous to a woman, so I would say the generalization is fairly true. On another note though I must say that it's not socially acceptable, these "men" just don't care what people think if they have the tiniest chance of getting pussy.

CubsterShura · Answer

It is common but it shouldn't be. Not all societies agree with it, but most have kind of accepted that it is something that will remain in the society, and it is so sad.

Luke_James · Answer

Nah it's not.
Some do it just for fun but most are just loosers who want to annoy you. They pertinently know you won't sleep with them. In both cases you should just ignore them, maybe it's not easy but that's the only thing to do in my opinion.

Sourav143 · Answer

comments can be accept in streets or everywhere.. if you wanna Talk you can go ahead n tell her but dont comments with anyone or alone.. think about your sisters or cousins too if they had to face these comments.. 😕

Astoriana · Answer

I feel like it’s always been socially acceptable to catcall and sexually harass women.  I think now it’s starting to become unacceptable. Finally.

Decentguy · Answer

Men Who does that are fucking assholes, I think they should make a law about this, That whoever catcalls any women would be arrested, or pay a heavy fine, because its a asshole thing to do.

Marharaya · Answer

Tbh the man who told you so was right... he just informed you that your underwear is visible... but in general whenever i hear or see a man making inappropriate comments to a woman i cringe

Anonymous · Answer

We have been told time and time again that Females do not like being Catcalled which is understandable but We have also been told that most Girls want a Guy to be Confident and approach you Girls so that's why us Guys don't approach you anymore or even bother interacting with you and that's why there are still Guys who Catcall Females but I know that is no excuse by any means.

scottalanmiller · Answer

I think it's the opposite. It used ot be acceptable, now it is not.

unbetesauvage · Answer

You ask for it... miss see through. How many times you look yourself up and down in the freaking mirror before you go out? You knew it was a white dress. What color was your panties red? Stop bitching and take responsibility for your damn actions. Silly question!

WaywardMoose · Answer

Cat calling is just disgusting. It usually leads to stalking or sexual assault (in my case). People saying its a compliment should learn to give compliments.

Ayer93 · Answer

No guys who give compliments like that are expecting to get laid. They just think of it as fun. If anything they probably don't have good experiences with girls and just say "fuck it".

Lolen · Answer

I think its a social norm, but not socially accepted. Like, we just let it happen, but still frown upon it

AlwaysBelieving · Answer

If it is, I'm not socially acceptable. Meaning that I haven't (at least not intentionally... there were a few times when it was "timing") catcalled a woman.

I'll think to myself about something, but it will just say in my head.

AquaBoo · Answer

It's not acceptable. We just notice it and move on. Mature people either take it as a compliment or ignore it. You should do the same.

Desconhecida · Answer

Not acceptable but tolerable. People learned to ignore what's wrong around them and the world instead of changing things for better

RationalMale · Answer

I'm sure there's some guys who catcall. Flip side also is being successful with women needs a guy who is uninhibited--and very few women are ladies anymore, so what's the big deal?

endlessunknown · Answer

Its become unacceptable. There isn't a lot of people who do this. I don't see why its so offensive to people anyway, a minute of discomfort in your life is that horrible? And there's plenty of ways women disrespect men.

RenuP · Answer

No it's actually becoming more and more frowned upon. So much as they have started calling everything remotely flirty harassment.

Anyways what you've gone through is def inappropriate and I do hope those crude comments would get weeded out.

CT_CD · Answer

Women are fine with being catcalled if they find the guy attractive

Jboogey · Answer

Cat calling is lame and dead as fuck... get some intelligence and convo and you maybe good to go

Anonymous · Answer

It should be illegal, where are feminists when we need them? All feminists are doing is suing good men and framing them to get paid, fucking disgusting.
It's sexual harassement and it should be BANNED everywhere!

LittleSally · Answer

Hasn't it always been socially acceptable? At least among men...

MedicalAdventure · Answer

In some countries it is, in other not. For example in Dominican Republic it is a widely spread phenomenon. In Switzerland if you do so you are seen as a pervert

corlreef · Answer

its become a lot more common and most women dont say anything back so men think its okay to keep doing it bc they haven't been told not to by the person theyre catcalling

Anonymous · Answer

If anything ii would guess its less common cause women are speaking out on issues of sexual related comments/contact.

MimiHashima · Answer

More common than you think... ._.;; ugh lolols.. even at work lols. Make et stahp! XD

JellyDonutguy96 · Answer

i usually cat call at Lamborghini's but sometimes girls think i'm doing it to them,  I'm kind of a car guy if I see a nice car I'll make the sound

Has catcalling and making inappropriate comments to girls become socially acceptable?

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