Is a man losing his job reason enough for him to cry?

[Anonymous]

So basically my friend is mad at me because she told me her boyfriend cried last week because he was let go from his job he's been with for over 3 years because of the pandemic and he has a lot of stress. But she says instead of crying, he should have used the time to look for a job. I told her the loss of a job is like a death and I don't think it's a big deal that he cried. You can look for a job any time. I don't think the 20 or 30 minutes of him crying impacts him losing out on job opportunities.

I also told her I think it was more about her being uncomfortable seeing him cry. Dude is like 6'3, well built, and has what I call a scruffy lumberjack look with his beard and stuff. Not someone you'd think would cry, but I think it made her uncomfortable. She said she just doesn't see the point in him crying over something he can't control.

I told her she was being kind of a bitch and she hung up on me and won't return my phone calls now. I'm not sure how many years they have been together. My guess is 3, but I don't remember the exact number. She was with him before I met her.

Updates

+1 y

So apparently he doesn't even know how he felt about him crying. He just posted on Facebook how wonderful and caring she's been since he lost his job last week and how it's nice to a woman you can vent your feelings to. I guess maybe she was just venting to me.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't say that's a reason to cry. If I lost my job today I wouldn't be crying. I would be busy looking for some other job, or another way to make money for myself. Crying doesn't help. When you're in a situation like that it's time to toughen up and get shit done.

The way she's acting now, being nice to him but then venting behind his back, is the way most women feel and act when men cry. This is why men shouldn't take notice of the feminists here talking about toxic masculinity and men crying all the fucking time, even many of those would act just like that woman.

[DCooper]

This reminds me of all the comments I've seen people making about how it's a good think for guys to not hide their feelings when they're hurting. What you just witnessed was your friend showing a very typical female reaction to seeing her man let himself appear vulnerable in front of her. Did she seem turned on by it?

[Asker]

She seemed annoyed. But she's also the type that when people get in her way, she proves them wrong. Like her father told her she'd most likely end up being a stripper and that's all she was good for, so she got a full ride scholarship to university and ended up with a degree in industrial engineering. That's just the type of person she is. I don't think I've ever heard her cry about anything or even complain. She just has the mindset of, "well, that just wasn't good enough for me, so I'm going to find something better." She thinks he should be that way, too.

Basically, if it were her that lost her job, I don't think she'd cry about it.

[sheikalana]

Of course it's a reason for him to cry. I would cry too. Specially during this uncertain times where must be so hard to find a new job.

[anonymau55]

Yeah loosing a job sucks. Men can cry about whatever women can.

[Brian___1731]

Of course any gut would cry. We're brought up by parents telling us that we definitely have to get a job. And when we get that we at least feel we are stable. I think there are times when guys cry and they shouldn't be stopped. I mean covid has destroyed so many careers and we can't do a lot but at least give him his space. He must have worked really hard to get that job. And I agree with you. She could have been a bit more understanding

[Brian___1731]

*guy

[Guardian45]

Sure! Why not? As you said, 30 minutes changes NOTHING. AND medically, lowers his cortisol levels and probably boosts his endorphins, which will ultimately mean relaxed clear thinking which is OPTIMAL for HIGH PERFORMANCE DECISION MAKING. Translation? Job-hunting

Tell that bitch to get over herself. She sounds like my EX-WIFE!

[Anonymous]

I know there's all the stigma but it is reason enough to cry in my eyes.

In my case my income supports our household as my girlfriend has epilepsy so can't work or works bare minimum hours. Even toward the end of contracts I start to feel low because there is so much pressure to get another job to afford things and everything could fall apart if I dont.

[Likes2drive]

You sound a lot more mature and understanding than her, she doesn’t realize the loss that is for a guy, it feels like a divorce or death at times depending how long you were there

[Likes2drive]

Sounds like she was being phony to him since he doesn’t realize what she really thinks of him , not sure if he should know or not about what she was really thinking

[Asker]

You don't always have to tell someone how you feel if there's no benefit to it. I don't think she was being phony.

[Likes2drive]

Yeah true, she probably didn’t know how to act so she called you

[Anonymous]

Ohh poor guy doesn't even know how mean and horrible his girl is. When he will realise that relationship gonna end and they will regret wasting years of time...
Guys are human too.. This time is hard for everyone. Some little cry doesn't mean he will not look job...

[Asker]

I personally think she just didn't say anything because she didn't think it would be beneficial.

[MrHopper]

< 6'1, me in picture, i would probably cry. We all cry, everyone, we are all human no matter how we look. Sounds like she's has unrealistic expectations

[DermalPunch]

Hmm... so do you feel you could be better partner to "Dude is like 6'3, well built, and has what I call a scruffy lumberjack look with his beard and stuff." ?

[Reaperbot666]

if it was a job he enjoyed and worked hard to get. then showing some emotion over losing it. is understandable to a degree.

[worldscolide]

A man's usefulness is directly tied to his work, so yes.. Especially in a society where women are taught to abandon a man if this happens..

[worldscolide]

reading further, you sound like a better person than her.

[asshole_]

Sometimes

Men shouldn't, nor should women, cry... when it's something like you were given burnt fries.. it's too much. but, like, if you lose someone, or whatever, sure. that's fine

NOONES OUT TO GET YOU

[dublin_sexyeyes0]

Yes it is. A man losing his job can be a mental trigger that he is worthless and unwanted. His pride could be hurt.

[YHL6965]

She's kind of insensitive and cruel to think that way of her partner just because he cried. She does not sound like a good partner if she does things like that.

[soleil2666]

Any reason to cry is a reason to cry. And a much better way to deal with emotions than to get aggressive or oppressive, vindictive

[John_Doesnt]

You're right, she is a bitch. Hopefully that dude will find a better woman.

[Dchrls78104]

These days, YES; it was hard enough to find and keep a job before the pandemic.

[coffeewithcream]

I think he should wipe his eyes then wipe her right out of his life.

[Meatunnel69]

Mens tears come at the expense of a wet vagina
#facts

[Anonymous]

I cried when I got furloughed for two months; so why can't a guy cry when he gets laid off?

[TallAnon]

Crying isn't something you have a reason for. It's just a reaction.

[bklynbadboy1]

Your friend is very in sensitive he probably had some other things going on in his life as well