Is it fair? No. But many things in line aren't fair, and favor one sex over the other.
Whenever you think about human attitudes about sex and relationships, it's important to remember that these rules didn't spring into existence recently, but rather they've been around for hundreds or (more likely) thousands of years. This is especially important because that means they long pre-dated the massive post-WWII changes in technology and medicine that have MASSIVELY changed our society and culture only very recently.
Imagine a time before birth control existed and "sex education" barely existed: having sex meant that pregnancies were an expected and predictable side effect, and there was limited knowledge in how to even reduce the likelihood of pregnancy. Having children out of wedlock was considered shameful, with women often being sent away to a distant relative to finish her pregnancy and have the child before sending the child to an orphanage (and, often, the mother into a nunnery). This is because men would rarely marry a non-virgin, and almost never agreed to support another man's child. There were important reasons for this too - social progress was much slower, and social climbing tended to be a multi-generational affair, and that made inheritance FAR more important than it is to most people today - in fact, it was often THE biggest thing that determined your future in life, as "going to college" wasn't a thing.
Inheritance - of the family name, of positions, titles, lands, and incomes - were all tied to birthright, so it was extremely important that paternity was known. Among the noble class, an illegitimate child often meant massive ongoing social disruption, and sometimes even war. It was a BIG DEAL, and was strongly discouraged.
If women didn't get pregnant, then casual sex/pre-marital sex likely wouldn't have been looked at in such a negative light, but they did, and it was. Illegitimate children were a huge social disruption and caused years of strife for the families, and the children themselves were considered second-class citizens, were often abused, and often became criminals. If you watch a show like Game Of Thrones (or, better, read the books), they show some of these issues, and the stories were based on real Medieval European history - pulling elements from English, Spanish, French, and German history in particular.
As for men, prior to the 20th Century, men sleeping with unmarried women was also not socially expectable either - with one significant exception: prostitutes. And prostitution has been widespread throughout history - for hundreds of years, the Catholic church even ran brothels (and were not the only religion to do so) - and, much like today, prostitutes could be found in every city and town and even big military and mining camps. And prostitution was generally seen as a necessary evil - it was a "vice" activity, but much like drinking and gambling, it was "men's business" and was mostly left alone and not talked much about.
While prostitution began to be cracked down on in the 20th century, it was still fairly common (with full knowledge and approval of authorities) until after WWII. At that time, a large effort was put in place to eradicate prostitution, this and other changes led to more "social promiscuity" as men replaced prostitution with casual sex with non-professionals, out of necessity. With the simultaneous rise of birth control, women were far more willing, but the old social standards continued to be taught and continue to be taught even today, several generations later.
It certainly isn't fair per se. But i need to point out the generally accepted view of those sexes on this matter. Guys are generally mostly horny without emotional attachments, like sex and relationships or even attachments for that matter are two separate things for a guy. (i am speaking for myself and for those who align with this). Woman are generally seen to be the more emotionally attached among the two, like its generally seen or accepted that women only have sex as an option after they have feelings or attachments even of the slightest level. Is that true? Not necessarily, but its caught on as general trend. So when a guy is or has or have been woth multiple women it mostly points out that he is of high quality that many women accepts to be with, all the while his fidelity isn't questioned as he is seen just adventuring his sexual side. ALONE. (back to the point where guys can have sex without attachments of any sort). While women are seen to be the attachment types, multiple partner often indicates that she has an issue with said fidelity as attachments are assumed to be present.
Also note, that guys won't give up that easily on girls they want unless she goes absolutely psychotic and tries to murder h or something. While its generally seen easier for a girl to get a guy, its the opposite for guys and hence seen as an achievement more so that not.
There is also the side of just basic dominance seen in instincts, for example like how in a pride of lions, one male satisfies many females in said pride of lions. It could be very well any of these reasons, i hope this helps.
Maybe it has something to do with women getting jobs and wanting the same yearly wages as men, but these name-calling could've been used before women needing jobs to help pay for rent and put food on the table. Yet again, this may not be the case. I'm guessing "this is a man's world" phrase really put us women below their (men) feet. Then again, this probably has nothing to do with history. I'm guessing to avoid being called "whore", "slut", "thot", etc, you have to really do something to avoid those titles. I don't want to think about others calling Lesbians "sluts". But anybody, any gender can be a slut and why just women? There are some same sex couples and some opposite sex couples who act like sluts in bed and they'll admit it to each other but won't cheat or engage in group sex and threesomes, I envy those who don't do that. Having a couple who loves sex wouldn't mind being called "sluts" in bed, now would they? As long as they are each other's sluts, then it's fine. But speaking assumptions, why call a woman one of those names without any evidence of her actually doing what those names define instead of assuming from her actions? Those are two different things, acting like a "whore", "slut", "thot", etc and doing what defines those words. Acting and doing are both different, though they are verbs. Acting gives hypocrites the audacity to assume. Doing is evidence of the activity.
I don't understand either. Sure a man does require a bit more effort than a woman to get laid to begin with, however, I don't think that it is all that impressive if he can't keep a woman in a long-term relationship no matter how macho and charming and whatever he is.
I had a boyfriend who could impress women and many liked him when I was in a relationship with him. I had a chance to see his texts with another woman and every word he tells others is like honey spilling out but he was rather harsh with me! When he said that it's because he takes me seriously and would never give me fake compliments I accepted that especially because I truly hate false complements. But even in times when I needed him to be gentle and compassionate towards me he would still believe that harsh way and it made things worse for me.
What the fuck is the use of gratifying women's temporary giddy feelings if you can't retain your significant other's long-term happiness? What the fuck if the use of being charming with women who probably don't care all that much about you when the woman who actually cares for you is not happy?
A guy having a lot of girls is NOT what makes an Alpha Male. His ability to get women has nothing to do with that. Guys who are Alpha Males are men with confidence, self-assurance, leadership qualities, bravery, respect for themselves and others, and a clear path in life.
But to answer your question, men get respect for getting a lot of women and women don't get respect for getting a lot of men is because it's extremely EASY for women to do it and extremely DIFFICULT for men to do it. It's kind of like asking why you don't get respect for gaining a lot of weight in a short amount of time, but do get respect for losing a lot of weight in a short amount of time.
It's not fair that women can be a 4/10 or less in looks and still be entitled enough to not only expect nothing but 9/10 men and higher, but also for those men to do the heavy lifting and approach the woman all the time. Yet no one ever complains about Hypergamy. It's not fair unattractive/short/overweight men are automatically assumed to be "creeps/incels" whenever they must their courage to talk to women despite already likely being insecure/nervous, but hot/tall/athletic men can act like assholes and treat women like total sh*t and still get them fawning at their feet. But no one ever complains about that.
If you want to compare the "disadvantages" between men and women in the dating world, then I don't think that's a game you're going to like the outcome of, very much.
@mcheetah plus the fitness image is on point, when i used to go to the gym back when i was in highschool, you could rarely see women there, and even when they were, they only do cardio, which is like our warm up xD
Thats not what alpha male means tho it is one of their traits. there's two types one is kinda a narcassist and theb other doesntn have to say much and he doesn't haveb to compare himself to others. people will gravitate to him or go to him to solve a problem, guys that get a lot of girls ussauly called players, womanizers. since the begining of time society has jused women to blame for many of our downfalls. look at thev adam and eve story, that story got twisted around. she actually solved the rittle eve means new morning giver of life not what know her as today the reason for pain the patron of death. that story and many other legends are jsed to control even today women rights, the people who voted women rights rto taking seriouse did not do it for women but they allowed it because there was something to gain ffrom that, for example double income meankimng now both parents go to work both parents pay taxes more money kids will stay longer in day care spending less time with the family somehowv that ties in with private prisons
Because society has some hopelessly backwards attitudes when it comes to sex, and very few people are willing to openly challenge them. Sex is often seen as something women GIVE to men, rather than something that two people DO together. Consequently, a man who persuades many women to GIVE him what he wants is successful, and keeping what you might call the "sexual economy" going, while a woman who GIVES it out too freely is undercutting the market; she's seen as being indiscriminate.
It's a horribly dehumanizing view of things, but pretty much every alternative just take its off in another awful direction. I think that much of humanity would genuinely be happier as some other variety of ape.
Others disagree with you on the meaning of alpha but regardless, to answer your Q: Because men & women think differently. Feminists thought they could change the way men think and force men to agree with them on everything but they were wrong. Most men believe that if a woman sleeps around a lot she's not high quality or serious relationship material. You might as well ask why don't men want a 450 pound mustachioed woman? After all according to feminists, "all women are beautiful". Because male preferences actually do matter and can't be hand waived away.
I agree with this. I have seen some many toxic traits pushed by both sexes but I have noticed that a lot more of it does happen to come from feminazi women. Not the real feminists, who believe in mens rights as well. But the feminists who claim they want equality when deeming men as the weaker sex in need of domination.
An "alpha male" is actually a strong personality type. It's little to do with women, though most tend to be misogynist, just like the "alpha female" will be misandrist.
A guy that has lots of girls is called a "philanderer". Whereas a girl that has lots of guys is called a "slut".
A "whore" is someone who sells their sexual favours (male or female).
Stay in school, kiddo. Learn the meanings of words and phrases.
Because those people who judge are pussies. They're scared that women are already powerful (they have the capability to give birth). For them a woman is supposed to nurture the family. They're threatened and worried about themselves, they think that - 1. Who will be their door mat? 2. Who will be their maid? 3. Who will be helpless and dependent on them? 4. Who will they insult or threaten to leave? 5. Who will keep on feeding their ego by constantly fighting for them? So you see this is too scary for the manwhores because they will have NO ideal pushover to settle down with when a woman keeps her options open.
This is true it’s not fair both should be called whores.
that being said it comes from a point in history where men were encouraged to go out and have sex with as many girls as possible, this of course started in the 1960 during the sexual Revolution (now everyone knew when a boy and girl snuck into the bushes what was happening it’s just wasn’t talked about. But the only mind set and the new mind set conflicts since we started discouraging waiting for marriage to have sex. But still expecting women to stay virgins until marriage and you can’t have it both ways. Either we should all wait until marriage to have she’s or we should all just fuck who we want no matter the consequences. It’s part of the culture war we are currently in, What do we want as a society. Personally I want one where people do there own thing the government doesn’t crack down on people smoking weed having sex with whom they like and the government is in peoples live as little as possible.
When a man sleeps with a lot of women= value goes up
women sleeps with a lot of men= value goes down
Women who are 7s (or any other number ) will always have more options than a man who is a rated a 7 (or any other number). Women will always have more options than men.
I bet you any money if a women when to a bar, and said that she will have sex with anyone in the bar 80% of the men would line up depending on how attractive she is.
if a man did the same thing he would probably end up in a jail cell.
Women are called sluts because they give up their pussy too easily, whilst a man is called an alpha Male because he gets pussy easily.
Most people say it’s society that is responsible for that phenomenon. I highly disagree. It has evolutionary reasons! But it would need me a long time to type it in since my English is not good. I am not saying it is fair tough.
But on the other hand, what most people forget when they talk about slut-shaming is, the opposite. Virgin-bashing is the a problem for many virgin guys. If a guy is a virgin although he is in his twenties, he is considered a loser, incel, beta male and so on. If a girl is a virgin in her twenties she is considered innocent and special. But that also has evolutionary reasons
Because women allow it and they care too much. You think men would give a damn if they were called whores? No. They wouldn’t give one gram of fuck. They might agree with the label and move on, keeping their whoredom up and everything. Women have to just stop giving a fuck.
Women praise a want a man that has a lot of women, she feels more powerful when a men that is desired by many is with her, on the other hand, men are hunters, we have our eyes on the bigger prize, a girl that can cherish herself and is unobtainable. If you dont like this, is simple, stop going after male sluts, because if you think this is unfair, is your problem, not ours, just because your favourite ice cream flavour is strawberry, and mine is chocolate, i shouldn't change my tastes just because you think im wrong.
Weeb, women want a good looking man with his shit together that other women might also want. They do *not* want a man who all other women have already had. In other words, they want a man who women want but can’t have because he wants her and only her. Male “sluts” are not attractive to women looking for long term relationships.
It's a psychology thing, but it mostly comes from this weird idea women have that men will want in women what women want in men. Men and women play different roles biologically and in society. Women benefit from being as selective as possible with their partners and demonstrating that it takes a lot to get her attention. Men prove their worth to women by being as eligible as possible. A guy who demonstrates his reproductive worth to a lot of women will have a high number of women be willing to give him their time and attention. A woman who sleeps with a lot of men shows that she's not very exclusive.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Because men are truly convinced that the more a woman sleeps with, the looser she gets. Even when that has literally been scientifically dis-proven.
It also comes down to a sexism thing. Even though its 2020 men still feel like their women should be at home catering to all of their needs 24/7, whereas a man can cheat and be praised for it by all his buddies because he isn't "whipped" by pussy but has his bitch at home on lockdown.
It's incredibly disgusting no matter which way you look at it. I have never judged people based off their sexual partners. I have judged people for their outlook on it though.
One it's extremely difficult for a man to get one women let alone a few that like him sexually and romantically however some pussy can get a girl a long way, prime example Cardi B who was singing about pussy. Girls if you ever been on a date more then likely you been on more then 5 at least with a few different guys. However unless your rich or good looking most guys aren't gonna get that same amount of attention. Do i think it's right that this happens? No but it happens because you let it and therefore it is what it is. Do i have a problem with a girl being a slut nope and do i have a problem when a man is being a slut nope as long as it's not family related or friend related then by all means do what you feel is right. Your gonna get karma for everything you do and rather its good or bad is on you
Women praise a want a man that has a lot of women, she feels more powerful when a men that is desired by many is with her, on the other hand, men are hunters, we have our eyes on the bigger prize, a girl that can cherish herself and is unobtainable. If you dont like this, is simple, stop going after male sluts, because if you think this is unfair, is your problem, not ours, just because your favourite ice cream flavour is strawberry, and mine is chocolate, i shouldn't change my tastes just because you think im wrong.
It comes from the old tradition where only virgins were allowed to marry. If they divorced (this is after it was made legal) they weren’t allowed to remarry, and all they could to do to get some action was to become a prostitute, hence the name ‘whore’.
From what I've heard it goes a bit like this: If a guy offers to a woman, he may or may not get a yes. If a woman offers to a guy, he will most likely say yes to her. So basically, it's because there's a struggle for a guy to get an agreement than it is for a woman. While both sexes do get anxious, hesitant, and even worried they'll back out if they ask for sex, men only have one more thing to worry about.
Cry, all you want, that it "ISN'T FAIR!!" It's YOUR FAULT!! Because Women are the ones that surrender their personal integrity, and just ADORE these bullshit USER, D-BAG guys, because they are 'hot'! THEN, those women, that WILLINGLING let this D-bag take advantage of them, BITCH, and COMPLAIN, after, when they realize they were used!!! YOU Chose that guy, and got fcked over, and then HE is the problem? Ladies!! Have some sense!! Don't let d-bags just use you!!
Probably because usually the masculine tend to be more physical while feminine more emotional in a relationship. Men are simple beings and women are more complex. But of course I wouldn't discriminate anyone based on who or how many people they have been with. I like a partner who challenges my choices and in turn make me stronger. What matters is that there's the yin yang harmony
Because women don’t work for dick. We work for pussy. A mediocrely attractive woman can walk outside and ask “who wants to fuck “ someone’s gonna say me 🤷🏾♂️😂😂 . But men actually have to have something to have a lot of partners. Dick holds no value, women work for our hearts and attention.
She's only a 'whore' if you're not lucky enough to be among her men; elsewise she's a 'man eater'.
As to 'why'... the prevailing paradigm is promulgated in order to be 'the cultural ideal' is to become heterosexually monogamous , 'promiscuity' is forbidden except to make babies and raise a family to perpetuate hypocritical 'society' .
Because it's nothin for a girl to get with a lot of guys.. It doesn't take work most times.. Whereas if guys have a lot of girls it shows that he has confidence, and swagger enough to have those women gravitate toward him.. I don't agree with either, but it's not the same because men and women are not the same.
Eew that's not an alpha male🤢🤢 I call them man whores. I don't encourage sleeping around for anyone regardless of the gender. But that doesn't mean i force my views on someone else But that's a player and a man slut
The answer is because you care. As long as you give meaning to what everyone else says and thinks, they’re in control. I had plenty people call me a whore when I was a single young man dating around. The this is, it never bothered me one bit. lol Therefore it never mattered. Women should be able to date/smash as many people as they choose if they single. And nobody can put any title on them for it.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I call them fuckboys and douchebags if they're spend too much time and energy trying to get laid.
If he's successful enough to have women throwing themselves at him with little to no effort on his end, then yeah I guess "alpha male" is an appropriate description.
Because a quality woman is supposed to be selective. If a guy lays a lot of selective women, there has to be something attractive about him to get all those women to spread their legs for him. Conversely, if a woman is spreading her legs for a lot of guys, then she's not selective and therefore not a quality woman.
Lol no matter what if he is called alpha male or something else but nobody wants to love or settle with guys like that it's just sexual nothing more than that end results are the same both will be left feeling empty after the one night stands or nobody in real cares for them once the deed is done it's over
It likely has to do with the idea of the white wedding dress. White wedding dress is supposed to represent that she's a virgin, untouched, pure which is what white represents in general (pure).. Of course it's no longer really a thing. You see non virgin women getting married in white all the time. This would only be my guess though
Men don't wear white, yes, they have a white shirt on under their suit but, that's basically covered up by the suit jacket
Because its harder for a guy to get sex than a woman.
IF a girl goes to a bar and is semi attractive every single guy in that room would be willing to bang her and she could leave with a guy no problem that night if she wanted too. If a semi attractive guy goes to a bar, it is extremely rare for guys to be approached by a woman for sex.
Because of 1000s of years of male supremacist social conditioning. There's no other valid categorical answer as to why men and women practicing the same behavior,"in this context, is bad for one and good for the other without delving into chauvinist territory. Only in specific cases, like if a woman tried to pin a pregnancy on a dude when she knows she has been sleeping with other man does it become bad behavior.
It isn't fair nor right. One is a whore and the other is a whoremonger. However, based on society, specific to Western culture, is because alpha men attract lots women and has the personality to get them to sleep with him, while a whorish women just has to show up and look borderline decent and some weirdo at the bar will still have sex with her.
i guess, in a world where woman is considered as an achievemnt
usually one player gets one acievmnt every achievemnt have its own unique value one having many will be considered as special talented
achievemnt which many people can win are no more an achievmnt they r not a matter of pride they doesn't promote any talent.. fighting and winning them is an insult their value is very less
It's called that for only a moment your seeing it in real time in to give to ten years the girl will have what she wants in ten years the guy will be alone because he has burned every bridge and he was found out not to be the stud he thought hevwas
Alpha is an ego term used to explain a man who has a leader, dominant type of persona. Not a man who sleeps around, that's just as much of a slut as a women would be if sleeps around but what would you wanna call a woman who sleeps around if the term whore offends you? Lol a nan? An angel? 😂
In a the real world we have lables, and we judge. In a teen age mind we dispute and deny but never take responsibility. Lets just call her McDonald's drive through lol is that better metaphor? Or public puss service 😉
Any concept can be, I'm talking about a negative attitude in society. Although there is nothing wrong with this lifestyle. It's just that girls need to be treated the same way as guys.
So in the eye of your dad you should be the pride of the family sleeping around same way your brother sleeps around... Does it matter to you that one fucks and one gets fucked? Lol
I believe the term is 'Player' not alpha male and if youve had lots of partners you're successful, if you've cheated then you're a whore/player. I dont see why people say this so much, I've never seen a man get complimented for cheating, I've seen them get their ass kicked though. On the same note I've never seen a girl get called a whore for just trying with many guys as long as she didn't cheat. I usualy hear them get told 'YOU GO GIRL DAMN'
I wouldn't call a guy like that and Alpha Male, I'd call them a low-life player. As for women, it's best to keep your body count to yourself. It's no one's business but your own. If someone asks it's a red flag.
Because patriarchy, basically. Men took over the most powerful positions in most societies that survived and grew to dominate the world and they never allowed women enough rights to live equally and we're not moving away from that fast enough.
I think its because we can get pregnant where as a guy has no consequences he can choose to not be in a kids life where as we're usually stuck with having a kid.
Biologically speaking a man is to spread his seed as much as possible while a woman is to select the proper partner to get impregnated by. Not that any of this matters in current society, but that's why.
Is just a societal double standard. Sort of like women claim they are independent and 2ant 3quall treatment but get pissed when they get it because the want men to get the door or do the heavy lifting. Shit don't work both ways.
I don't know why, group think is stupid. Guys who think it's ok are fuckin idiots. It's ok to have a few here n there but these people make a sport out of it.
I think it's due to the fact that guys are expected to approach women and makes moves.
It is a double standard though, so I agree with you on that.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Men and women look for different things in a partner. One of the things a guy looks for is that she is not a cum bucket. Women look for things like height and money.
That is the whole basis for the difference. I think its unfair that women don't date short guys but guys date short girls. I think its unfair that men will date a girl who makes less money than he does but most girls won't date a guy who makes less then her.
Things are different between men and women. Women likes experienced men, and men likes women who has not been used by other men. And for those who denies the difference between men and women, give men a equal say in abortion cases, transmen could get pregnant before they transitioned so saying men can't get pregnant is transphobic.
It's better to just not listen to outsiders, no one really understands what really happens in your life, so just block out the people who will try to hold you back
Yes, you say everything correctly. It's just that people close to you sometimes condemn. For example, parents. They don't like this way of life. It is difficult for them to prove something :(
I heard from a meme, "if a key can open lots of doors, then its a master key. If a door can be opened by lots of keys, then its a crappy door". I dont think its fair either but it was just something funny that made me laugh
Women praise a want a man that has a lot of women, she feels more powerful when a men that is desired by many is with her, on the other hand, men are hunters, we have our eyes on the bigger prize, a girl that can cherish herself and is unobtainable. If you dont like this, is simple, stop going after male sluts, because if you think this is unfair, is your problem, not ours, just because your favourite ice cream flavour is strawberry, and mine is chocolate, i shouldn't change my tastes just because you think im wrong.
It is fair. Men have to work and put in effort to get girls. Girls just have to exist. So it equals out. Men who excel at something difficult are looked up to. Girls who roll around in the mud are looked down on.
Just exist? I do not agree. This is work on the appearance. The guys don't notice this. Many girls go on a diet almost all the time. In addition, you still need to monitor your hair, facial skin, constantly do depilation, masks, peels, all kinds of wraps, and so on and so forth. Do not forget to mention the "magic" cosmetics, thanks to which a woman can look as natural as possible or turn into a burning seductive beauty for the evening. Do you think it's easy? This is also work. And in the evening, all the beauty is "written" on the face, it is vitally necessary to wash it off so that the eyes rest, and the skin does not acquire a couple of extra wrinkles overnight. Oh yeah! More nails! And not only on the hands, but also on the legs, especially in summer. Yes, a girl can "just exist", haha :)
Wtf is wrong with you? Thats crazy! My girlfriend doesn't even wear makeup except for special occasions and it only takes her like 10 minutes. Yet she got dick (me). I think you're living in dream land.
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