Have any of you guys been scared to commit?

[Anonymous]

I've been seeing this guy for 3 months. I recently asked if things were exclusive between us he said he's not wanting a relationship but he isn't seeing anyone else. I cut it off as I've already wasted 3 months with him. Anyway he messaged me yesterday saying he legit does like me but he doesn't want a relationship then he messaged me again saying that maybe he just needs to get over himself and realise not every girl wants to hurt him. He knows I'm scared of getting hurt by him. Any advice or similar experiences?

[Poison_NT]

There are a lot of possibilities
He could have been hurt himself on his past relationship, and not because he doesn't want to hurt you, but because he is scared for his own health. in that case you need to prove to him that you really care, and are loyal (this is important if his ex had cheated on him) look above him, and show him that you respect him, and value his time. There is also a small chance that he is just testing your patience.

The fact that he makes it clear that he is not seeing anyone else, is a good sign. so hold onto that for a while.

In worst case scenario, he is not mature enough to commit and he is scared.

Maybe he wants to invest, and take care of himself more at this stage or year, but he doesn't want to lose you, and maybe he is thinking to himself, okay i will be done with this and that, some self development and in summer i will commit to this girl if she stays loyal to me, guys won't say it to you when the time is right, but they know when.

[Asker]

He was in a relationship for 3 years and they just ended a few months before we met. I get the impression he was really hurt after the break up as I've seen status on his Facebook from that time. I told him I'd wait but he said he didn't think it would be fair on me as he doesn't want to hurt me as he doesn't know when or if he'll ever be ready. That's when I called it quits then he messaged me saying he maybe just needs to get over himself.

[Medhat-M]

Even if he's legit about that.. Not cool he didn't say that from the start or give any big hints along the way... Dude is just enjoying all the attention...

[Asker]

Yeah I agree and I said that to him, he apologised but still unfair.

[Medhat-M]

This might sound harsh.. But you don't seem like a first choice for him...

[spartan55]

He isn't scared of getting hurt. He's scared of not being able to fuck around.

[jahaims]

Nope