Hello all. I am in so big depression and I have been in it for the last 5 years.
Five years ago my ex fiance left me for another man. I loved her so much and I still do and I miss her, I wanted to spend my whole life with her, but I guess she didn't love me the same way.
Since then I started drinking so much, even at work. I started gambling, I started questioning my sexuality also. I was and still am broken, damaged, lost and sad. I was all alone, because my family and close people were far away from me and I guess I fall into the hole.
Now I am 30 years old, without any hope for the future, all alone in all terms. I was also a semi pro football player, but an injury in my knee ruined that and it was a little earlier from my ex fiance leaving me. Now I become a little fat, I am also balding really fast and looking in the future I can't see any hope.
My only distraction is watching football and Liverpool. But I am not in my country, I don't have any friends right now or anything. I guess sport would do me amazing job in becoming better, but I can't do that now.
I feel really lost, broken, weak, unsure in myself..
So if any of you can think of something that can help, thank you.
All the best for everyone!
