Guys, What does it mean when a guy asks, "Are we gonna make it?"?

[Anonymous]

We've been having problems but we both agreed to try again. After he asked me, "are we gonna make it," he added that these are "new waters" for him. He's trying to change some things about himself. So why would he ask "are we gonna make it?" What might he mean by that?

[Gingerbread_GB]

I think he's basically asking you how much are you committed to this relationship. He has committed to make some changes, so he wants to know what are you doing to hopefully make it work.

I think the bottom line is if you really want to maintain this relationship, you should at least be more understanding as he try to change himself. People can't change on a dime, give him some space, give him some encouragement.

Of course, hold up your end of the bargain if you made any promises.

[Asker]

Thank you. I like your answer because it rings true with how he most likely is thinking and feeling right now. He already knows that I have put years of effort into being patient and understanding, and that he was the one uncommitted to change until fairly recently. Maybe he's checking to make sure that his working on it will end up earning my trust back. Thanks again.

[Gingerbread_GB]

Now on the other hand, hold him up to his words. If like you said, you've been waiting for years for him to change, then maybe he has a habit of breaking promises. Of course, I don't know the details of the issue at hand, but if you see him reverting back to his old habits and it's a deal breaker for you, don't tolerate it again.

[Asker]

Thank you.