Why would my guy friend block me on Messenger only after telling me everything was good between us?

[Anonymous]

My guy friend that I've known for years has now blocked me, but only on Messenger. We're still Facebook friends, which is confusing and hurtful. We've had bumps in our friendship on and off, but always talked it out. He learned about my past trauma/abuse and about my anxiety and was initially super understanding. Last fall we hung out together and had some drinks and just had a fun time. We decided to hangout again and we're making plans, and then he snapped at me. He's been cold and dry ever since and I don't understand what happened. He won't have a conversation about it, and just gets harsh. This makes me really anxious, and I worry if we're okay. He had just told me it's all good between us, then asked me to stop messaging so much. I asked for clarification as to whether I should give temporary space or never talk again, and he said he didn't see me making progress with my anxiety and blocked me on Messenger. It's been a month, and I'm still really hurting. I sent him a handwritten letter to thank him for the friendship and things he's taught me, even if it was only temporarily. Why would he only partially block, and are we not friends now? My heart hurts.

[Anonymous]

If letting go of the friendship is that easy for him then you need to have the same energy, even if you’re hurting. I don't know if you were starting to like him as more than a friend or what but dwelling on the situation won’t help you. We can’t tell with certainty why he blocked you or give you closure, only to can make peace with the situation.

[Asker]

He flirted with me quite often, but I never reciprocated. We had a fun friendship and shared a lot of laughs. I panicked when he was so excited to hangout because I knew that it could result in more flirtation and I'd have to shut it down. He's an alcoholic and I can't take that on. I had to be honest with him about all of it, my mixed feelings and his drinking. He said he understood my feelings, but he was never the same after that. He also said I talk too much.

[Opinion Owner]

And after all that, you still wrote him a letter thanking him for an amazing friendship? As if his presence in your life was so much more valuable than the other way around? You give yourself way too little credit and need to keep things in perspective. He’s not a good person to have in your life, and I think the biggest mistake was not only putting him on a pedestal but treating this like such a loss. He’s a flawed man, he has work to do on himself, and you’re better off without him. Keep that in mind, reconnect with old friends or try making new ones and let him go. Since he has no problem doing it.

[Opinion Owner]

I recently ended a 15 year friendship. It’s hard to let people go but you’ve got to remember you’re worth being sad over losing as well.