Why do guys get upset when girls decide to have sex with others, even if they have no plans of dating the girl?

[Anonymous]

The guy used to have something for me but was very sure he didn't want to commit. We agreed and split ways apart. But he got immensely upset when he came to know I was hooking up.

He started throwing tantrums like yelling, shouting and throwing stuff.

He was clear of having no interest in me. Moreover he is upset, even after a considerable time has passed.

Updates

+1 y

Well the guy in the question was one of my admirer, who I rejected.

[boecker-propagator]

Consider the following model:
Men want sexual intimacy from women and will take it if they get it for free.
They get what they want by offering commitment (resources, attention, support).

Women on the other hand, they want commitment and will take it if they get it for free.
They get what they want by offering sexual intimacy.

Both men and women take care not to spend what they have to offer and the other sex craves on bad investments (cheap/bad people) and protect their value (men take care not to waste money and attention, women take care not to spend youth and health).

Before the background of this model, the guy basically wanted to get what you have to offer, but he didn't want to pay for it (metaphorically). When you asked him to commit, he said that he didn't want to do that.
When he heard later, that other guys got what they wanted and what he wanted, he felt defeated, because he wanted to seduce you without paying, and he failed at it. Others succeeded where he failed.
Maybe he thought that you were one of the "good girls" who is not into sexual hookups when you asked for commitment.
Then he hears of you hooking up (which means this was about sex, not about commitment, right?)
which basically makes him feel like "damn. So it IS possible to just f*** this chick without commiting and other guys were able to seduce her into that, but I wasn't."
Before you slept with other guys, it was okay for him to be rejected. He didn't want to "pay" after all.
Now that other guys get you without paying, because sleeping with them is payment enough aka attractive enough, the guy understands that he just wasn't attractive and seductive enough.
Also, since he doesn't really value you that much, being unwilling to commit to you, it hurts even more, because he felt like you are under him in the hierarchy and he could just play with you. I bet he doesn't dare try to seduce women he is strongly attracted to and would be willing to commit to and basically tried to have kind of a practice run on you, since you are not that attractive to him, he thought the emotional investment would be lower and the risk of getting hurt would also be lower. I bet he wanted to practice on you and now he's really butthurt about being rejected by the girl who was supposed to be his mediocre practice toy.

If I was you, I would try to distance myself from this man. He doesn't value or respect you.

[Asker]

he was once willing to commit with me but I rejected him for my ex.

[AviatorTom]

Sounds like the "big brother" syndrome. Though he doesn't want to commit to you, he likes you and wants to make sure you are safe... like a big brother would. He thinks you hooking up is not a good idea and let's you know that.

Rather than getting upset about that, just take it in and let him have his tantrums. You're a big girl and can make your own decisions.

[BasedBaeBecca]

The guy in question sounds overly sensitive and like a total loser. It is clear that he lacks self-esteem and is unable to move on with his life. It is not a healthy way to carry yourself. It is time he stops behaving like a teenager and starts growing up.

It seems that he has some unresolved issues revolving around self-esteem and feelings of entitlement. He should move on with his life and make an effort to improve himself emotionally instead of making his personal shortcomings your issue.

[Billlewis]

Probably because they're jealous.

[Anonymous]

i don't know any guys who get upset by that

[Wise4myage]

He's just a jealous and immature fool.

[In_Trance]

I don't know any guy that does this

[Anonymous]

Because you're a whore.