Why do some men not take a woman's "no" seriously?

Question

he keeps asking me for sex. i say no. A few weeks later, he asks me to reconsider and I said "no". Then 1 month later, he casually brings up sex again and I said "why the fuck are you constantly pressuring me for sex? " he says "im not pressuring you. im just asking". I glared at him and ignored him. Then later on, a few months later, he asked again I lost my temper and just screamed at him with rage.

why do some guys not take a woman's no seriously? what is their mentality behind it?

when someone says no to me , I just respect it and move on. I don't try to disturb other people like this.

DeezGutz · Accepted Answer

The reason you are saying no is because you know something is disturbing, just be aware & prepared not to recieve his attention and someone deserving will inevitably come along with much better quality attention.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Because they are mentally rapists It's just the fear of prison/justice stopping them enacting it  Cut off and feed him his own bracole, that'll learn him good

SeekingSubmission · Answer

IT'S NOT THAT WE DON'T FUCKIN TAKE YOUR NO'S SERIOUSLY!
WE DO AND WE TRY TO DO OUR BEST AS MEN TO RESPECT THE ANSWER N TRY NOT TO BRING IT UP AGAIN TIL WE THINK YOU HAVE ACTUALLY HAD ENOUGH TIME TO ACTUALLY BE INTERESTED IN THE SEXUAL SIDE OF THE RELATIONSHIP AND WANNA TRY AND MAKE OUT WITH US AND SEE WHAT YOU END UP FEELING!

AS GUY'S WE ARE ALWAYS GOING TO FUCKIN BE EXCITED ABOUT THE SEXUAL SIDE OF A RELATIONSHIP AND EXCITED TO GET TO ACTUALLY BEGIN THAT ADVENTURE WITH YOU! SO WHEN YOU FUCKIN TELL US NO AND EXPECT US TO FUCKIN RESPECT YOUR DECISION ON THE SUBJECT JUST TRY TO REMEMBER THAT THE ANSWER YOU JUST GAVE US WAS A (NO I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX I'M NOT READY YET!)
SO WE HEAR IT AS YOU NEED MORE TIME TO GET YOUR MIND READY FOR THAT SHIT! N WE ASSUME THAT THE MORE TIME WE ARE PUTTING INTO THE RELATIONSHIP THE MORE COMFORTABLE YOU ARE GETTING WITH US SO YOU CAN BE COMFORTABLE WITH US FOR THE MOMENT THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS! SO WHEN WE CUDDLE UP ALL CLOSE TO YOU TWO WEEKS LATER...
AND ASK YOU ABOUT ANYTHING WE POSSIBLY CAN TO GET US ON THE SEX SUBJECT AGAIN SO WE CAN ASK YOU IF YOU ARE READY TO BEGIN TRYING ANY OF THE SEXUAL STUFF AS WE SENSITIVELY TRY TO BRING YOU SLOWLY INTO THE ALREADY ANNOYED SUBJECT!

BECAUSE WE'VE SPENT THE LAST TWO WEEKS THINKING ABOUT WHAT IT WAS GOING TO BE LIKE WHEN YOU GIVE US THE OK N WE FINALLY GET ON TOP OF YOU AND START SLOWLY GETTING EACH OTHER EXCITED...
BECAUSE WE ARE ACTUALLY VERY CARING AND SWEET FUCKIN INDIVIDUALS! AS FAR AS GUYS GO WE ARE ALWAYS GOING TO TRY TO PUT YOUR HAPPINESS AHEAD OF OURS! BUT YEAH WE ARE GOING TO ASSUME THAT YOU ARE INTERESTED IN DOING THE SAME THING FOR US!
SO WHEN WE WAIT THOSE TWO WEEKS AND WE SPEND THAT WHOLE TIME THINKING ABOUT IT WE'RE ASSUMING THAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOIN THE SAME FUCKIN THING TO GET YOURSELVES READY AND IN THE RIGHT MINDSET!

WE ACTUALLY ARE TRYING TO BE CARING AND LOVING AND ROMANTIC ABOUT THE WHOLE THING, WE WANT YOU TO FUCKIN HAVE THE BEST TIME OF YOUR WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE WHEN THIS MOMENT COMES AND WE ALWAYS GET EXACTLY THE SAME BULLSHIT! IN RESPONSE!
ALWAYS ACTING LIKE WE ARE ONLY INTERESTED IN GETTING IN YOUR PANTIES AND GETTING TO FEEL THE PHYSICAL SIDE OF THINGS BUT THE WHOLE TRUTH IS THAT WE ARE JUST AS INTERESTED IN FEELING THE WARM EMBRACE OF US HOLDING EACH OTHER IN OUR ARMS DURING THE WHOLE THING! AND TRULY WANT YOU TO FEEL COMPLETELY HAPPY ABOUT THE WHOLE THING!

WE ARE ONLY HUMAN AND WE ARE ALSO ONLY MALES TOO AND THAT MAKES IT A LITTLE DIFFICULT FOR US TO BE ANYMORE SENSITIVE ABOUT THE WHOLE THING!

WHEN YOU GET ANGRY N PISSED OFF AT US ABOUT THE WHOLE SITUATION AND SUBJECT WE ARE JUST GOING TO END UP GETTING HURT OR UPSET AND FEEL RESENTMENT TOWARDS THE FACT THAT YOU DON'T HAVE THE SAME EXCITEMENT AS WE DO ABOUT THE WHOLE THING N FEEL LIKE THE FEELINGS YOU HAVE FOR US AREN'T AS REAL OR AS STRONG AS THE ONE'S WE ARE FEELING FOR YOU!

provokeesmokee · Answer

They're just assholes. And/or they are collecting restraining orders like Pokemon cards.

Report him for harrassment and make sure any establishment you two frequent have him on a watch - and stop interacting.

Men like him just aren't capable of being reasoned with. Block, ignore, and defend yourself against him.

Escalate to calling the police on him if he won't leave you alone. For some really stupide men, this is literally what they need to happen (and chances are good he still won't understand, but keep calling the cops).

MrOracle · Answer

1. Persistence WORKS surprisingly often.

2. Some girls WANT the man to pursue her and "convince" her. Don't believe me? Ask them, right here on GaG. You'll get many women who agree with how you feel, sure, but you'll also get quite a few who think that "real men go after what they want, and I want a man who doesn't take 'no' for an answer!"

3. Some guys are entitled assholes, or are simply players (there IS a difference, even though these two groups have plenty of overlap), and they'll keep pursuing something or someone they want until they either get it or until they're convinced that they never will. As long as it doesn't cost them much, they'll keep asking if they think they can get away with it.

A_Bell · Answer

Ever go test drive a vehicle? Get an insurance quote. Look up a tennis bracelet online?

Ever notice that you the get flooded with sales pitches over and over again even if you were "just looking?"

Men are supposed to pursue both biologically and socially. It's how evolution worked and now it manifests in different ways in our modern society.

Stop being so critical about men's biological differences if you expect us to get a pass on periods, pms and acting like every man is a violent rapist because he's physically larger.

CurrentJohn · Answer

That has nothing to do with being man or woman but is more about the personality of this individual. Maybe he is very arrogant and conceited and thinks that it is impossible that a woman like you wouldn`t want to sleep with a super attractive guy like him or someting like that.

I am a man and if you tell me no, then like you I too would respect that and move on, but not every person is like that. There are also women who stalk men and don`t understand a no. I think it is really more about an individuals personality and their upbringing rather than gender playing a role in that regard.

scentoflavender · Answer

While he should respect your boundaries, and I'm happy that you stand up for yourself, if this is is a problem why continue to engage with him? I'm not judging your relationship dynamics or insinuating you should do anything you feel uncomfortable about. But clearly sex is a priority for the guy. And understandably so. Again, I don't have all the information, but if he's just asking, I don't see the need to get quite that mad at him. Maybe you should explain why you're preferring to not engage sexually? Make an effort at connecting with him so he understands your side? Otherwise just a blanket no... well it could be viewed as no for now. Not saying he's right, or you're wrong, and I certainly don't have enough information. Just maybe a different perspective. I hope you find a happy ending to this though.

Anonymous · Answer

I think in your situation if you've made it clear that you will let him know when you're ready, and that he shouldn't ask anymore and he keeps asking, it's time to be worried that this is not someone who is ever going to respect your wishes.

If you're the guy in the situation and you keep hearing no and all you want is a yes, walk away, because I hear some guys saying, well, it's all part of the game, but if that is true then she will follow you if you walk away, but if you keep pressuring someone who is NOT actually playing games, you are the problem and she will leave because you have no respect for her wishes and/or to respect that she knows exactly what she wants.

molonski2 · Answer

Because NO , very rarely actually means NO , its part of the chase , I love being told NO , but I would never take it as a given , you've got to keep going , I have one girlfriend that this is what I adore about her , she always says " No No No " , but it always happens , its great !

Anonymous · Answer

For answering your specific question,

There are tons of women who play these hard-to-get games, even if they say no, they just want the guy to try harder. This is very real and after some no, when the girl agrees to a relationship, eventually the guy thinks that's a pattern. It's actually very common.

Movies and TV shows also promote this narrative.

This even happened to me. The girl said no, but I stopped contact. She watched me talking with another girl after some time and get jealous and tried to sabotage that talking. When I rejected her, she even got mad.

Siri137 · Answer

That's what I would like to know. What, exactly, is their problem? "No" means NO. It's such a simple word, so easy to understand, and yet some people apparently have a great deal of trouble accepting it as an answer to a query. So bizarre.

AndLikeThatHesGone · Answer

How do you know this guy that's constantly asking you for sex?

Why does he even think sex is a possibility?

I'm not accusing you, but it seems like a piece of this story is missing.

Does this guy have emotional difficulties or something?

Fireguy17 · Answer

He isn't listening to you.
He hears you, but really doesn't care.
He might in his mind figure he will wear you down and you will say yes, but I'm thinking from your demeanor I have a better chance of being struck by lightning while pregnant the day after I win the lottery than he does being with you.

Anonymous · Answer

It'd psychology. At some point in their life they figured out that if they were persistent they could get what they wanted. Maybe they asked their mom for something. She said no. They cried. She said no again. They cried more. Until eventually she gave him what he wanted. And now he has taken that mentality with him into adulthood. It also indicates that he doesn't have a lot of experience. Someone with experience knows how to get what they want and won't over rely on one tactic, like being persistent.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Because they're retarded.

I could list all the little aspects of how and why etc, but they all boil down to just being a moron.

Smart people need to feel loved by someone to want to have sex with them. Getting rejected is the opposite of that, as is asking without first getting any sort of love/affection/commitment first.

Anonymous · Answer

You won't like this, but you have to lay a lot of the blame at other women, who say no when they mean yes but want to provide token resistance so they can keep believing they are good girls and not sluts.

It's backward, it's stupid, it teaches some guys the wrong lesson and some women pay the price.

Anonymous · Answer

Huh... ironic. White&Black American females where I am (now a middle America state, but I was raised around immigrants on the Coast), all think I have an attitude problem and am rude because IM NOT trying to "get with them" and ignore them. I don't want anything to do with their self destructive culture... sorry, can't, and won't, feed their massive egos.😒

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

Since it clearly bothers you why do you keep hanging out with him?

serious · Answer

Well that is right, unfortunately. I think there is a flaw in a man's thought process and then the male ego plays a role here as well.

Wonderingguyy · Answer

Because some people are selfish and have no respect for others. He just wants to get some, and will continue to put his needs before your feelings, because that’s what selfish people do.

Pegases · Answer

Same reason some women don't take men's "No" seriously. Lack of character, has nothing to do with gender.

Why do some men not take a woman's "no" seriously?

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