What's the reason for men lying about being attracted to a woman?

[Candykanelove]

I just left from seeing my friends with benefits and again he lied to my face. He told me I couldn't just visit him without saying anything. So I asked him if he was saying he didn't want to see me anymore. And he said that's not what he's saying. I told him I thought he enjoyed having sex with me. He said he does (again lying). I told him I knew what type of women he likes and he started laughing. I kept asking him if he just didn't want to see me again and if he wasn't attracted to me anymore. And he said he's just saying that I can't show up without telling him. I don't get it I don't understand why he just doesn't admit that he's not sexually attracted to me anymore. I'm just not understanding why he lies about something like this? I've honestly never been in a situation before where a man constantly lied to my face. I know what type of women he really likes (All he ever follows is skinny chicks on social media).

I even told him that it's ok if he's not attracted to me and doesn't want to see me anymore. Yet he lies I guess I'm just trying to understand the logic behind this. Anyway, I'm done with him and I am going to see someone else now. But I'm just curious about why men like this? I'd never do this to a guy.

He wants me to tell him if I decide to sleep with another guy. And that he and I would just be friends without having sex. Then he commented how he knew he could get me to have sex with him again (if we stopped having sex because I decided to be with another guy). I'm not telling him sh*t screw him he thinks he can lie to my face. So he doesn't need to know anything about me. Why does a person who constantly lies to my face need to know if I'm f (cking someone else? He doesn't if he can't have to common respect to stop lying to my face. Then I am not telling him anything about what I do with someone else.

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

That’s not what he’s saying at all. You really shouldn’t be showing up to people’s places unannounced not only is it rude it’s inconsiderate. Maybe he had some other company over whether another romper or maybe his mom. He probably didn’t feel like having sex, contrary to belief men don’t always always feel like sex. He could still have sex but if he’s not really there mentally it’s a potentially unsatisfying experience.
If you felt like he wasn’t attracted to you anymore then why go over there and start an argument, where there didn’t need to be one? You just overstepped an friends with benefits rule. Did you establish making this an exclusive sexual relationship between you two? I think the problem is that you might be more emotionally invested than you might be aware of right now. Do you want it to be a relationship? I can’t say you’re going to get one, chances’ll be pretty slim.

Just generally speaking from experiences. I’d want to know if my sex partner is banging other people so I can make the choice to remove myself because sexual diseases are very real things. Not everyone gets check ups regularly and I only get one, in my case vagina, some people don’t like literally F&king around to find out.

[Candykanelove]

You're right I shouldn't be showing up unannounced. Just like he shouldn't be lying to my face for over a year. He knew what I looked like on the dating app when he matched with me. He knew I wasn't his type then. I've asked him many times to be upfront and honest with me. And he constantly lies to my face. So now I'm going to tell him that I need a break. And I am going to date the other guy.

He doesn't want to have sex with me if I'm having sex with another guy and wants me to let him know. So what does that mean? I don't want to be in a relationship with him because he's a liar.

[Candykanelove]

Yeah didn't feel like having sex with me because I'm not really his type right...

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

What? You’re really just reaching with a whole lot of assumptions. It sounds like you’re a little hurt and there’s nothing wrong with that. You can definitely feel that. I see this is transitioning to a self-esteem issue. If he wasn’t attracted to you in some capacity he wouldn’t have continued having sex or interacting with you. If you don’t feel good about yourself that really has nothing to do with him, he’s not going to automatically see that you possibly want something more just by having sex with him. You’re not being clear and projecting that he’s lying because you’re having a deeper issue of thinking you’ll be rejected because of your physicality. From what you’ve written I’d say he’s not lying on this particular issue. Wanting a dating relationship vs. a friends with benefits are not the same things.

[Candykanelove]

I'm not saying I wan something more. I'm saying I don't like that he lies to me and says he's attracted to me knowing he's not. This is what I'm saying having sex is a physical act. And seeing each other naked I want the guy to actually think I'm attractive. Are you saying you wouldn't want the person you are having sex with to find you physically attractive?

[Candykanelove]

*want*

[Candykanelove]

I'm not talking about being in a relationship I'm talking about the fact that he's a liar. I wouldn't do that to anyone having sex with them knowing I'm not attracted to that person.

[Candykanelove]

I'm telling him that I want to take a break (and then I'm going to date the new guy)

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

-_- you just accused the man of saying he wasn’t attracted to you, but he has already said he is physically. I know a lot of men and women like to waste each others time. However men are more visually stimulated and if he doesn’t like an ounce of what he sees he’s not going to bother or you would’ve just been a one night stand. To answer the question, I would but that would suggest we want something longer term than just one sexual encounter. If it’s a one night stand and both people just feel like having sex it doesn’t really matter if anyone was physically attractive. That’s what I’m saying most people in todays world at our ages are going to keep smashing people they don’t find physically attractive.

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

We’re telling you, as I read three other peoples answers. Logically, realistically people aren’t going to continue a sexual relationship with someone they’re not in some way shape or form not attracted too. Especially not physically because that’s really juvenile. Like I said in a different reply in the world today at our ages and plenty of options of other people he would’ve either left you alone or you two would’ve just been a one-night stand. Take a break no one would say otherwise. A lot of us are just saying it’s a stretch bordering unfair to call this man you’re talking about, a liar.

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

Aren’t going to keep smashing people they don’t find physically attractive*

[Altheavas]

I think you’re reading too much into this. You guys are friends with benefits, no emotions, no entitlement involve you guys are not exclusive either. That mean anywho could see anyone outside the window ya both agree to meet and smash.
So yeah, why would you show up at his place without prior notification? you’re not in an exclusive relationship.
You shouldn’t just show up on a short notice either. It goes both way. No commitment strictly business to relieve casual body needs. Y’all could just act as a regular acquaintances/don’t know each other at all, at any events if either of ya see one out in a date.


Ya both need to sit down and set the rules straight again, and find another friends with benefits.

[Candykanelove]

Being friends with benefits requires you to see each other naked. So I'm not sure why I shouldn't be upset about him pretending to be physically attracted to me. Are you saying you don't want the person you are having sex with to be physically attracted to you?

He wants me to tell him if I'm having sex with another guy because he doesn't want to sleep with me if I am. But I'm not telling him anything it's not his business. Especially when he's not even attracted to me that's not his business period.

[Altheavas]

You guys wouldn’t be friends with benefits if y’all weren’t attracted to ya both physically.
It doesn’t seem like that’s what he was seeing either, I think you have misinterpreted that part.
Yeah “it’s none his business who you seeing” however like I mentioned,
The roles about the friends with benefits gotta be reset, to me both y’all crossed that boundaries!

[noohair]

Men used to have to make a commitment to a woman for sex.
That was love and marriage.
Women wanted freedom and equality.
This is what freedom and equality looks like.

[Jerre]

I don’t think his lying is common to all men. Your bonehead guy friend is close to being alone in that category. Drop the idiot and find a man who is truthful.

[Candykanelove]

I mean I've asked him many times and he's lied to me every single time.

[Jerre]

@Candykanelove Time for you to find another guy. Most men won’t lie to you. Find one or two friends with benefits who will have sex with you when you want and how you want it.

[Jerre]

@Candykanelove Thank you for the MHO.

[Staximus]

Going by the way that you described it, it doesn't sound like he's the big liar you say he is. It just sounds like you're crazy.

[Candykanelove]

How does it sound like I'm crazy? I've asked him many times and he's lied to my face on each occasion. So I've given him plenty of chances, to be honest. I even told me it's ok if he's honest and that he won't hurt my feelings and he still didn't say anything.
I don't understand it because I've never lied to a man about being physically attracted to them.
But it's ok because I'm going to text him and tell him that I think we should stop seeing each other. Because it's obvious that I'm not his type and leave it at that.

[NathanDavis]

I've never lied about that...

[Candykanelove]

Yeah, this is the first time I've ever experienced this.

[WhitneySnow]

Why are you so convinced he’s lying?

[Candykanelove]

Because he ONLY follows skinny chicks on social media.

[WhitneySnow]

Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you too

[Candykanelove]

I'm saying he doesn't like my type that's what I mean.

[WhitneySnow]

Maybe. But he might still be attracted to you personally. Sometimes people are attracted to a person even though they’re not their usual type.

[Candykanelove]

I wish I knew why he'd like to me every time I've asked him about it. But I guess he just doesn't have it in him to be honest with me.

[WhitneySnow]

I don’t think he’s lying. He likes you even though you’re not skinny.

[Candykanelove]

I'm ending this friends with benefits and telling him I think we should end the friendship. As I know I'm not his type physically and leave it at that.

[WhitneySnow]

Okay

[Billlewis]

You deserve better than this guy is doing for you.

[Candykanelove]

Have you ever experienced this before? Having a man lie and act as if he was into you physically?

[WhitneySnow]

I’m sorry. I haven’t. I always assumed if you mess around with a guy it at least means he likes you sexually.

[Candykanelove]

Yeah, this is what I thought too until now...