Does this sound like being taken for granted?

[Yahoo13]

Would this bug you if in your relationship (early 30s) together for years and not living together currently. So my boyfriend and I dont go on dates out and spend time if I go usually make plans to come over and we will watch movies and get some food and sex and some chatting. ( try to catch up 3-4 times a week depending on my work he has been unemployed for nearly 2 years now.. another issue) he doesn't seem to see the issues with not really going out much and doesn't seem to want to come to events and things with me and says he hates movies because people are there and things. Anyways since he isn't working ( has some issues but also won't seek therapy or help himself) sleeps and plays video games all day. I dont mind him spending time with friends but feel like he is seeing them 6 days a week at least for hours playing video games and when I try and make plans with him he is usually like oh I already have plans with this person but can see you before or after and feel like im not a priority. Or we will be hanging out and he will get a message from a friend to hang out and will leave me there and go play games with his friend for hours. Is like why did I bother coming? 🙄 I've tried not to nag but feels like I'm a friends with benefits sometimes or like he would rather be with his friends. Sometimes I think its just me being silly. Would you be okay with this? Like I get upset trying to plan to see him but its like every time I ask he is always busy with this one friend but he can kind of 'fit me in then' kind of thing. For the guys is this normal for being in a longer term relationship?

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, that would really bug me if I was in your shoes. A few years together is a long time, you should still be making each other a priority, not feeling like you're constantly second to his friends.

It's one thing for a guy to want to chill with the boys sometimes, but it doesn't sound like he's putting any effort into your relationship at all. Like what's the point of having a girlfriend if you're never gunna do anything fun together outside the house and would rather ditch her to game all day? So not cool.

I get he's going through some stuff being unemployed but that's no excuse to just veg out every day either. He should be trying to better himself somehow while also not making you feel like garbage. Gotta meet a girl halfway, y'know?

If it was me, I'd tell him straight up how his actions are making you feel - that you feel taken for granted and like you don't matter. That he needs to step up and start making you a real priority again. If he won't even try to compromising or listen to your needs, might be time to think if this relationship is worth it anymore. Don't waste your time on someone who doesn't respect or appreciate you. You deserve someone who's gunna treat you right and be excited to spend time with you too. Talk to him but don't be afraid to put yourself first if he won't change. Good luck, girl!

[CallmeTheKnight]

He’s unemployed for two years basically and just sits on his behind and play video games and hang with friends. While you, spend time with him, have sex with him, and you’re worried about not going out with him?
He doesn’t have money to go out because be doesn’t have a job, but he has his own place, so does he pay rent or it’s paid off…. Income coming in from somewhere. Yet he doesn’t want to get a job….
Why would a sane person stay in this situation?

[laly520]

u need to move on
u aren't dating a responsible mature man u r dating a boy who is technically using u n wasting ur time

[Danny_dan92]

Yes.