He is interested but won't approach me?

[Anonymous]

This guy is someone I noticed in the library a while back. Eventually I started showing interest by making eye-contact but he wasn't always returning it, but I would hear from my friend that he was looking secretly. Then after 2 weeks he once passed by me and smiled at me so recently, this week we have been smiling towards each other every time we see each other.

I also made myself approachable, not being with friends etc but he still won't just approach me and I have never had to approach a guy before and I'm too shy, also I believe the guy should approach the girl...especially if she declares obvious interest! So why isn't he approaching me? I mean its obvious he's attracted and interested but he won't make the effort and that confuses me so I wonder if I should just give up?

I did consider he might be shy (although he's one of those hot guys who is confident so that took a while to decipher) but by now, we both are obvious about our interest so I don't understand and wonder if it hasn't happened now then it never will right? Even my friends notice it so does he even want to pursue?

[DinaColada]

There are a few different things going on. He could be dating someone. He might also feel shy approaching an awesome girl! Or he might not feel like he has anything to offer you. It's OK to sit back and keep smiling. Make sure if you see him, Smile, look away. Smile again hold his gave for a couple seconds and look away, then, smile, and hold his gaze again! 3 times is a charm. That will let him know that you are very approachable. If he is still too shy, you can approach him and say 'Hi." It's not 1950 anymore, and it's OK if a woman approaches a guy. You can say "If you wanted to call me, I wouldn't mind giving you my number." If you've never done this before, you've just gotta practice. It will get easier and easier. You can practice talking to other guys first if it makes you uncomfortable.

Good Luck!

Dina Z Colada

[Anonymous]

"also I believe the guy should approach the girl" this is just a societal norm that has been enforced since way back when women essentially had zero rights, there is no basis or reasonable explanation for thinking this way now. maybe he's saying all this exact same sh*t about you...

[yopyopyop]

Maybe he's really afraid of rejection. Deal with it, either by moving on, or by approaching him.

I mean, if you like him, you should be able to do some kind of effort for him, right ?