Lied to girlfriend and she dumped me

[jt14621]

well I was dating this woman she is 30 and I'm 26 for about a year its has been good and times and rough at times. well the last night I was hanging out with my buddy's at my place and just drinking. we went out later and drove around looking for something to do but ended up just going back to my place. well my girlfriend called my cell and I asked if I was home and I said yes, she then asked if I was home all night I also said yes not thinkin I went out. well she said she stopped by and I wasnt there and said that I lied to her. she was upset and hung up the phone. well the next day she ignored all my calls and I finally talked to her and she stated we needed to talk so we met out. she told me she upset about the lie and that's a deal breaker in a relationship and she feels like she can't trust me. well I told her about me and my friend stopping out to the store and she didn't buy it she wanted the truth. but I swore it was then she said it was just bothering her. After we had a drink we went back to my place to talk but she didn't feel comfortable in staying she said she didn't feel right about the lie and she just wanted the truth so I just told her that me and my friend went to the strip club which I didn't really go but I thought that's what she wanted to here since my friend always goes to the strip club and she knows that. well stupid me dug a big freaking hole she said she was done and the relationship was done cause now I lied like 3x and she doesn't respect me and will not put up with this crap. I just don't know what to do I tried to stop her and talked but she said there was nothing to talk about she is done. any advice would be appreciated I don't want to lose her but I feel I have. she obviously won't trust me. plus she came back that night to get her spare house key from me which I gave her.

[NeedingtoMend]

Listen, I know what you're going through because I'm basically in the same boat just a different situation. Trust is the biggest thing in a relationship and without it, you can't go anywhere. I don't know if it is possible to be forgiven and for thins to be okay, but you should try. Show her that you can be trusted and confess the TRUTH whether or not she believes you. All you can do is be up front and honest. Let her know you care about her and that you didn't intentially mean to lie about something stupid. By lying 3xs, well, that's pretty tough but the answers you were giving felt like it wasn't enough. Stick with the truth. Always. Never let her be the last to know what you're feeling. She's hurt and right now, she might need space, definitely needs time to think, but if you want to try and get her back, don't let her think you've given up. If she cares about you enough to forgive you and give you a second chance again, then good for the both of you.

Good luck to you and I hope this helps.

[jt14621]

Thanks for the advice do you think it would be ok to send some flowers with a note expressing these thoughts or is that too much? thanks again

[NeedingtoMend]

Ultimately its you're decision. You don't want to make her feel like she doesn't have any breathing room (if you have seen Good Luck Chuck, don't do that (= ) But you want to know that you have told her where you stand. There are a lot of things you could do but the choice of what to do is up to you. You could send flowers, ask her to dinner, meet her for coffee, write a letter, call her, etc. You can start with something simple and she how she reacts. If she's still upset, don't expect for a

[Shlei3]

Lesson learned I hope. Never lie because now you have ruined any chance of ever getting back together with her again. She sounds as though she may have been jilted in the past by a guy that was a liar. You could always try to apologize some more but really I don't see her budging.

[jt14621]

Thx for the comment I believe she will always think that but I haven't lied to her up into this point and it was a mistake and I doubled the mistake by adding on to it but you would think she would know what kinda of person I am after going out with me for a year and know that I wouldn't really go to the strip club. I guess I just have to give her space and move on with my life if she comes back then it was meant to be if not I guess not.

[Shlei3]

Exactly. It's never easy but that's the best you can do.

[Anonymous]

If you have an android phone, you can show her your GPS location of that day.
There is the proof that your are not a liar.

google android find