How can I convince my family to let me see a doctor/GP?

Question

I have had possible mental health issues since the age of 10 (I'm almost 21 now) that I have only revealed to my mum and sister within the last week or so. They've noticed that I've been withdrawn and they asked and asked until I told them about what I've been experiencing. Some of the behaviours I explained to them are things that they remember from years ago, so they connected the dots and realised why I did those things. I'm home from university for the summer now, but while I was there I went for some counselling sessions. Two counsellors I saw, and my mum, all thought of the same mental illness when I told them. And one of the counsellors suggested I talk to a GP about it. 

But my mum doesn't want me to see a GP and she doesn't like the fact that I've had some counselling. She thinks that they might keep the information I've given on my record and that it can affect me getting a job, lead to me being seen as a danger etc. I want to see a GP/doctor because they may have a good understanding of all of this, which could help me understand it too. How can I convince them to let me? Or would it be a bad idea to see one?

Paris13 · Accepted Answer

Anxiety and Depression runs in my own family, along with some other things here, dear. And with seeing a doctor and getting on the right meds, they have come a long ways.
Thank God I am only on Vitamins. However, I have watched for years what can happen to them without the Proper meds and it Is a roller coaster ride, to say the least.
I would not worry about anything going on 'My Record.' Unless it is for the Criminally insane or a person who has has had jail time, tell them not to to even think of this Matter, you have more fish to fry and they have to let you have a Try in getting your life of strife back in good standing with some... professional understanding.
The older you get, the worse this will get with no help. Ask them would they like you to be in a straight jacket one day, Visiting you somewhere if it ever should happen?
It is Best from the Rest to Nip it right now, and they need to start looking into the problem at hand and Need to Really... Understand that you need a Helping Hand. The sooner you see someone, the Faster you can get your life in order in Order to Live a Normal life so you can Obtain... Any job. This could eventually even Affect your schooling.
You may have to take the Bull and the Bull by the horns and just go see s GP yourself. However, Support from Family always helps when trying to Conquer the demons but if you don't get any of this, Go it Alone on your Own.
Good luck. xx

Luminifera · Accepted Answer

It would be a REALLY GOOD idea to see one. Also... fuck, I'm going to hell for suggesting this, please think hard about other options before trying this... as a last resort, if you start self-harming, your mum might change her mind. THIS IS HORRIBLE ADVICE. I said LAST RESORT. seriously. I started self harming to see if it really "worked as advertised" (numbing emotional pain by inflicting physical pain on yourself), and ended up getting addicted to it. Now I have those stupid scars on my arms and thighs. Huge mistake. SSRIs literally saved my life. If you feel like you might need help with your mental health, GO SEE THE DOCTOR

Levin · Accepted Answer

A few things.

All that information, by law, unless you pose a risk to anybody else, must be kept confidential.

Brushing this stuff under a carpet is not going to help anybody.

It's none of your parents' business. If you're over 18 and live in the UK, you can visit the doctor and make appointments on your own. They need not know.

This stuff is pretty common these days. A lot of people suffer from problems, those that don't, or claim not to, are usually the most repressed, and the most 'riding for a fall'. Maybe it can, strictly speaking, tarnish your work projections, because you're dealing with societal prejudice. It depends on how you go about it, how it affects you, so many variables.

Your parents are misguided in my view. They feed into this societal nonsense of how one is perceived by society, 'status', the like, being hugely important in the grand scheme of things. Those who claim to be perfect, may have that public persona, but we all know what happens behind closed doors... And maybe it's even worse, with the element of dishonesty. To me, it's far more important to be honest and true to oneself.

Intraluminal · Accepted Answer

After reading your post it's clear the question is not so much how to get family to allow you to see a doctor, so much as whether it's a good idea to do so.

From reading your post, I doubt that you have a psychosis, your writing is to well structured.

Generally speaking mental health issues are not a barrier to employment except in politics, some criminal justice positions like the FBI, and some government work, like the state department. If you had a psychosis, it's possible that it might be a barrier to getting a gun license.

Oddly, I think you might get the best advice from speaking to a disability lawyer.

snowangle · Answer

Your mom knows about HIPAA right? It's against the law for your doctors to share your medical information with anyone without your explicit consent. And to my knowledge, employers don't generally seek out their candidates' medical records.

True, you are technically an adult and can make an appointment for yourself on your own, but if you're still on your parents' insurance then yeah, it's a good idea to get their permission. Just try to help her see that seeing a doctor and getting yourself help is infinitely better than leaving your condition untreated.

Shygal11489 · Answer

If you are 21, you are technically an adult and it doesn't matter what your mum thinks. I would go see one. Have a friend or someone take you. It's your life! Also I'm pretty sure its illegal for companies to ask about health issues so your mum being worried about that part is silly.

Red_Arrow · Answer

A doctor (perhaps a pyschiatrist) can help you a lot. It is better to see a doctor and work on fixing what is wrong with you than worrying about your record, whcih employers should never see. As an adult you can see a doctor without your parent's permission. If they see now that you have had these problems for a long time, then they are harming you by trying to keep you from seeing a doctor. please go.

Spiorad_Aisce · Answer

Without sounding harsh you are 20 beyond the age where parental consent is needed. Do what you feel you have to do feel better. Medical records are super private and have strict rules related to them. Employers cannot ask for medical records when deciding a job application. As to being seen as a danger, I think the situation has to be something like you saying directly to professional "I am going out to buy a gun and I am going to shoot people" before they are allowed reveal things about you,

JohnDoe3000 · Answer

Your mom's right that an official diagnosis can affect your chances of finding a job (sure, it's confidential but if your employer finds out somehow you can be sued if you lied about it on a job application) and change the way people view you. That said, you're 21, you can go see a doctor without your mom's approval.

goldfinch23 · Answer

You're an adult, so you don't need permission to see your GP.
All medical information are classified. It's similar like if you go to priest. So I can't see the way how it can affect your ability to get a job.
It's your health and you've got only one. I understand why your mum doesn't want you to visit GP, but she should realise that like this she can put your health in danger.

Tenseven · Answer

That info should be kept private. There are laws (in the US) that prohibit medical professionals from disclosing their patients' treatment. Not sure where you live if it's the same.

Kaylyne · Answer

You're 21 years of age, therefore you can do precisely as you wish. Your parents cannot rule in this situation. Period.

larosie · Answer

You don't need your mums permission to see a GP. Just go and if your mum doesn't like it, don't talk about it to her.

lazermazer · Answer

Is there slight possibility that you are thinking too much. Today, every goddamn thing is some -sia or this n that. Maybe it was your teen, we all so some stupid shit that doesn't mean we need doctor.
If you still insist, go with your best friend.

LeFrogDog · Answer

Your 21, you're over 18 and thus are able to see a GPS on your own.

Anonymous · Answer

What do you mean "let you" you don't need permission, you can just go. Even 13 year olds can go without permission, I'm sure you can too.

Anonymous · Answer

If I was you I wouldn't go. Your doctor will treat you like a fool and just give you medicine.

MoonlitSonata · Answer

Your 21 don't need your fam to make an appointment.

AustinMan · Answer

If you're over 18, just go.

DisastrousQu33n · Answer

You're an adult, you don't need their permission

Anonymous · Answer

Why do you need their permission. You're an adult.

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