What's the big deal with 'working out'?

[Dantemustdie]

I honest to god don't know why some guys are insecure because they don't have a bit of muscle, I mean I'm slim but I'm not skinny nor am I what anyone would consider muscular either. I'm just a hair under 6 foot and I weigh like 150lbs, I think especially Americans have this image where they think they need to be muscular in order to get girls, I think it's a bit silly

Updates

+1 y

I understand people saying it's healthy or whatever, but I have a great diet, and I exercise too but I don't 'workout' as such for gaining size. I don't know why the guys have an obsession that being big makes them more strong and more healthy lol, I can honestly say that I'm pretty damn strong... my friend is 6"4 and about 220lbs and I can hold my own against him in a wrestling match, and I've done boxing before and I know that I can hit harder with my left than someone twice my size.

[MrOracle]

I totally get that most people would ideally like to be with someone who is fit and healthy. That is completely understandable.

But it makes me laugh when girls are attracted to big, ripped guys who obviously spend hours every day at the gym, because my next thought is: when will he ever have time to spend with you?

I've seen it happen a bunch of times, with two outcomes:

- The guy continues to work out all the time to maintain those muscles, and the girl is always complaining that he never has time for her, or that he's too self-centered, or

- The guy stops going to the gym to spend time with the girl, and those big muscles rapidly turn to flab, and the girl is suddenly far less attracted to him.

I mean, if a girl is also a gym rat, then I guess it would be fine, but otherwise, it's kind of setting yourself up for failure.

It works the same with women; when they are always dressed and made up perfectly, and always up-to-date fashionwise, you have to realize it's because they are spending HOURS a day on their looks, and if they maintain that, when will she ever have time for a guy? And if she quits to spend time with the guy, he'll wonder why she doesn't look like she used to.

The key in both cases is MODERATION. Doing anything to excess is going to have nasty consquences eventually.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[AmericanHero]

I agree with you man, I mean I know I am strong and I am confident that I'm able to protect myself and/or my lady, I eat good, I exercise naturally everyday, I mean walking from one end of my campus to the other is a long walk, and I bike ride too. I think the guys on here who say they wanna get built to be able to protect a woman are seriously insecure, I mean I've seen a lot of fights and just because you are a musclehead doesn't mean you have the advantage, they usually lack speed and finess, and end up getting put on the ground by someone like me or you, who can hit fast and with force. I understand people like to keep fit, but I always laugh when I see someone's profile, and they are standing in front of a mirror half naked and flexing, and then they list all their stats down in the description. I mean put a f***ing shirt on and be a real man about it, they're the guys who I think are seriously insecure, and if you look at their status they're always single, yeah all that working out has made you better... or not

[ZenQueen]

Your totally right, I like a slim guy, not sure why, the guy I've fallen for is skinny so I guess that's why I like it, he does work out but it's not so much for looks, just to keep fit, huge muscles is really not healthy anyways, it's a lot if stress on the heart. I actually have more muscle than my boyfriend, at times I don't like it but, it is who I am, my muscles allow me to do things I love, like bike long distances, surf, and I can out run most people too.. I think the American culture is just look obsessed in general, my cure to that? Turn off the TV and live your life the way you want, of some girl won't date you because your muscles aren't big enough, she's

's not the one for you.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[ZenQueen]

Can you not spam answers? Thanks

[sarahh_12]

I'm into the guy with muscles... It's one of those immediate attractions, lust for lack of a better word. For me though, I like it because it shows their active, and an active man is attractive to me. I'm a very active person, hiking, going outdoors, working out six days a week, all of that, I go crazy without it, so if a guy appears active to me, that just adds to the attraaction adn potential. There is a difference between healthy muscle, and unhealthy muscle; if he's doing steroids and whatnot, I won't find it attractive, natural is always better in my book.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[SomeOtherGuy]

It's very difficult for me to increase my girth. Even when I was very fit and buff, I was mistaken as scrawny and weak. Most people who pushed their luck with that found out how wrong they were.

Girls who dismiss guys for their body shape are the ones missing out, and I consider them shallow. I will date petite or curvaceous, as long as they maintain their health. I don't think I'd date someone who refused to at least exercise a few months out of the year and try to maintain healthy eating. But all things in moderation. I'm no hypocrite either, I follow the same rules.

And the same goes for guys. A healthy guy should be desirable. That has nothing to do with body size or anything. I hope all people try to take care of their health.

I'm 10 pounds lighter than you, and the same height. When I exercise, I don't mind my body size. Plenty of women are willing to date me, and I'm willing to wear medium clothing, not baggy or large. I don't go to the gym, I exercise at home with no weights.

Won't lie, I believe if I had a thicker physique I'd attract more women, but it barely affects my confidence. It really is minor. Put emphasis on your health, not your looks.

[MikeK]

Best answer

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[Anonymous]

Well.. I'm VEERY picky and judgmental about girls' appearance so I would be a hypocrite if I wouldn't set equal standards for me.

The thing is it's extremely obvious what makes a woman sexy.

Big boobs, thin waist, wide hips, nice ass!

But what makes a man "hot" to me is a complete mystery. I don't find men even good-looking at all.

Though I'm aware that girls pay attention to the looks of their partner almost the same way as guys to girls, they just ain't always open and honest about it.

The common things girls describe what makes a man good-looking are "well-defined jawline, height over 6ft, broad shoulders" - luckily for all of them that's a check for me and it's completely genetic and un-alterable.

But there comes another thing. Women say they like men with big muscles.

Though nobody is born with them. It requires intense bodybuilding to achieve it.

But that's not the main reason I work out. I can get girls without being ripped.

I work out to be stronger. It makes me feel more self-assured being aware I'm able to shred in parts most of people around me if there ever may come such necessity.

Though when the talk is about steroids or supplements - then it's not about strength.

Because strength equals good health, but poisonous supplements are not connectable to it.

Not to mention the effects rapidly diminish in the case of not taking them anymore.

It's all about willing to appear "hot" to women.

And no doubt it works...

But in my opinion it's not a trump card.

Looks are the trump card for women to get men, and their personality as secondary.

But for men to get women the trump card is awesome character and looks only as the secondary thing.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[BobBobinson]

Well, lets break this down.

From an evolutionary perspective, girls are attracted to guys with muscles. Why? Because good, healthy muscles are an indication of strength and good genes. Having a strong male around is good for child bearing, understand? It's not their fault they like it, it's how they are programmed.

And plus, why do you want to be weak and small? Being well built (not huge, but well toned), is useful for many things. Moving objects, fighting*, and it just adds to your confidence.

*While having muscles alone doesn't mean you can fight, if you ALREADY have fighting skills, adding some weight behind those punches sure as hell adds to their effectiveness.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[kheserthorpe]

Being slim has been more traditionally part of European culture vs. American. This has been true for a _long_ time. If you look at men's suit patterns from the u.s. vs. Europe over the last century, you'll see this isn't some recent thing. I believe it probably comes from the fact that traditionally, rich Europeans were slim (they didn't work doing manual labour, etc). The U.S. had more of a model of good looking guys who worked with their hands, or 'the big boss' who was just a big, heavyset guy.

Anyway, as someone tall and slim, it can be harder to find American clothes that fit. It seems like guys in the u.s. are either fat, or muscled up. The girls are also more often heavy, and heavy girls find guys who are slimmer then them offputting (it reminds them they're fat).

I've spoken elsewhere that I don't think guys have to bulk up - plenty of (slim) girls like thin guys. But there is some European vs. American difference.

[MikeK]

"It reminds them they're fat"... lol I love it! - So true

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[xzinax2]

well,working out keeps you healthy :P but I agree with what you're trying to say,guys seem to think that if they don't look like stallone they won't be able to get girls. so many guys in my town are obsessed with getting bigger muscles,hitting on girls,losing their virginity from age 13 that it's ridiculous,people are always on about how girls try to look/act older,but really,guys are worse. not all of them,some of them let nature take it's course and live their life without trying too hard,but damn,when I see a 15 year old guy ''going to the gym so he can get laid'',seriously,world? seriously?

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[ryanfromhere]

I work out because I like to be in shape and don't want to get fat. Also because I like playing sports and don't want to be tossed around... I'd rather do the tossing. And it's not that I don't feel good about myself, but after working out I feel even better about myself... it can be a challenge if you work out hard and you feel like you've accomplished something when you're done.

For girls, I don't really care if they're attracted to me because I'm in shape, I'm not doing it for their sake. But at the same time I would prefer my girlfriend to be in shape too so I don't think it would be fair if I sat around and drank beer all day and got fat.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[FierceMegan2]

In American culture we are constantly told what we are "suppose" to look like. It's a form of brainwashing. Everywhere we go we see magazines that project to us what we're suppose to look like. In movies and in television also. You rarely see "normal" sized people.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[Anonymous]

While you can get a girl's attention without being muscular, you tend not to pass the level of friendship. It sucks, but it's true. Girls tend to be physically attracted to those with muscle. Not extremely muscular, but not weak. Guys are built to be bigger and stronger than girls. If you're the size of the girl, she'll only like you as a fiend (usually). If she can bench more than you, odds are she won't be as impressed. Aside from attracting a partner, working out keeps you healthy and fit. It adds to your life expectancy and helps you academically. Just by working out a little will keep you balanced. I'm not saying go bench 220 or anything. Go for a three mile run every day and do some crunches in the morning. It's just healthy. That's all.

[cgrizzlybarron]

Hey I bench 290 and its nbd imo... LOL jk

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[Lights]

What's the big deal with working out.. is being healthy not a big deal to you?

A man that's healthy and takes care of himself is always attractive.. you don't need to look like a body builder to get girls, that's silly. In my opinion I find a guy that's obsessed with working out or has crazy muscles to be unattractive.. but your right a lot of men have that image of - being huge and muscular will get you girls when really it can make you look like a huge tool.

personality is always better. (:

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[DeanWillis]

you are sorely misinformed. although most guys are idiots and work out to get girls, real men work out for their own personal development. I don't work out to get girls. I work out because I want to be strong and confident. girls have nothing to do with it.

like others have said, muscles =/= getting girls.

[DeanWillis]

after reading other answers, I feel better about mine. good thing people aren't as misinformed as you are man.

[DrPain]

Wow the guy who made this question is an idiot. Guys who work out just to get girls are kind of pathetic. Honestly workout for yourself like^^^. This is why I workout to in addition to be healthier and stronger. The looks you get from girls are just an added bonus really.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[sammyangel9991]

Honestly, a guy who is in shape and muscular will get my attention 10 times faster than a guy who isn't. It's attractive and it's a sign that he takes pride in his appearance and cares about his health. You have no idea how much work goes into building a great physique. Those guys are in the gym 4-6 days a week working hard.

[Dantemustdie]

I just don't see the point in it, people are building relationships based off of how they initially look, I mean I know being attractive is good but wtf ever happened to being able to make a lady like you with charm, and not how hard your abs are lol

[sammyangel9991]

People are always going to be attracted to looks first. It's just the way the world works. You can choose to accept it or not accept it, but it's just how it is. When I walk down the street and see guys I'm not thinking about how charming they might be, I'm looking at them because I don't know them. I mean you can get girls without being physically attractive, but you have to get to know the girls before they become attracted to you and realize how great you are.

[sammyangel9991]

I'm not saying you're ugly. I'm just stating facts about how girls are when it comes to guys in general.

[Dantemustdie]

lmfao I know I'm not ugly, and my point is that relationships that are built off of pure attraction tend to fail miserably

[sammyangel9991]

no, not saying that they should be built off of pure attraction, but attraction is what gets you hooked in the first place. If you aren't attracted to them, why would you want to date them?

[Dantemustdie]

maybe because I like the way they make me feel?

[sammyangel9991]

and the way they make you feel makes you attracted to them...attraction is not always look-based, but it does have to be there

[Dantemustdie]

yeah attracted to them from their personality, not because they spend 4 nights a week in a gym

[sammyangel9991]

*facepalm* lol. All I'm saying is that if you are fit and attractive you have an advantage because even before you know the person, they already are drawn in by your looks. Of course if you get to know someone really well no matter how they look, you can be attracted to them for other reasons.

[Dantemustdie]

I understood what you were saying from the beginning, but I just don't agree with it

[xBurningSilence]

All she is saying is that being attractive gets your foot in the door, then the focus is on personality. This is how most relationships start. You could have the best personality in the world but if you aren't attractive people aren't going to know about your great personality unless you try extremely hard to get out there and show people that personality. Having a good body is all around more attractive. I'm sure you look at girls and focus more on the prettier girls.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[MrNameless]

Guys work out because

1. To be and feel healthier/have more energy

2. to attract women --because working out (burning fat, gaining muscle mass) makes you look better

3. give themselves confidence

4. it increases functional strength (you can lift more for everyday situations, and it helps if you're in a sport, and even self defense)

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[rachel05]

well I like to because it's a major health benefit in the long run and I feel good about myself.. self confidence is key to a happy life.. I might do it a little bit for the guy but I like the feeling of being young and strong.. my body just feels better afterward (not immediately obvi unless you're in shape then it won't hurt)

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[janelle615]

Mark, you a hater! Guys just want a good physique for confidence and live a healthy lifestyle. Getting Girls, it is a plus yo. Yum yum, I like dem abs and that V line. Meow.

Haha, I still love you.. ;)

[Dantemustdie]

I am not a hater, and I live a healthy lifestyle, I'm just wondering what all the fuss is about, just goes to show how different sh*t is in America, nobody over here is what anybody would call 'ripped'... I hate you too ;)

[Prof_Don]

I like this girl! ;-)

[sammy_31]

There is nothing wrong with a slimmer guy, I'm personally more into guys with muscle you don't have to be 'muscle man' like super huge just enough to show you work out. To me it shows that he cares for his body and likes to define his muscles and be strong as well. I like that look more than slim guys. Just my choice.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[Brando]

I don't think I need to get buff to get girls. I want to tone and get a little more cut up because I want to. It's something that not only I want to do, but it feels great doing it. Working out and getting all worn out from it is such a great feeling for some reason. It has it's obvious health benefits on top of the psychological boost.

Maybe it's just a culture difference but this question seems to be a bit ignorant (not said with an attacking connotation).

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[G-Daz]

What's wrong with being in shape? I don't work out for a girls sake, I do it because I enjoy it and its a way to expel stress and overall improves you're bodies natural immunity. Just because you gain muscle doesn't make you insecure, being physically strong and in shape is actually better for your health and I'm into a really physically demanding sport where I need to be in shape to do well. Nothing wrong with caring how you look

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[Anonymous]

I don't understand it either. Obviously exercise is a huge benefit to our health, but I don't know why some people take it to the extreme. Personally, I would rather have the slim guy... I don't think big muscles are attractive. It's great if they want to do it for themselves, but don't do it just because you think that's what women are attracted to.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[Frostie]

Its not about being "buff" or "insecure" its keeping yourself healthy. The dudes who work out 24/7/12 are the dudes who are to in love with themselves.

[Prof_Don]

Here is a question related to this one:

link

Thanks for answering. :)

[SkinnyG]

I like a guy to be toned, but not built like a body builder. As long as they don't have loose skin hanging off their arms or their gut is hanging over their belt then it's usually fine.

[Prof_Don]

Well said. You have earned thumb-up #2. :)