Do I have the right to be angry and hurt in this situation? Or am I just being naive? Did she actually reject me because of school?

[alvib]

I liked this girl in school for a while but never actually intended to start a relationship with her. We weren’t friends either I just thought she was attractive. One day, she randomly texted me something about a class we have together, and I was ecstatic. We began texting for numerous days (more than a week) and FaceTimed until late at night. It was obvious that we liked each other. At this point I’m feeling confident that we will be able to start a relationship due to how quickly we had become close. Then, she began acting distant and texting me weirdly. This occurred for a few days before I blatantly asked her if something was wrong. She said she felt like it wouldn’t be fair to me if we got close and she just disappeared sometimes because of school. She said she was interested in me at first but didn’t realize how fast we got close and also didn’t consider how her year would go academically. She also said, “I also didn’t think u would be interested in me lmao I don't know why I did this in the first place.” She also apologized for any confusion or stress she caused me. Then minutes after we have that conversation, she completely changes the subject to something about school. For some reason I texted her like I wasn’t extremely confused and hurt. Then a few days later I just tell her that I think we should stop talking for some time because I needed to lose feelings before we could be friends. She understands and says, “ Ik this is selfish of me to say but I guess i still wanted to talk to you so I didn’t want to suggest us not talking lol.” So then we stop talking and on new years she sends a message with a bunch of kind words and also says, “I hope that you have an amazing year, no matter what happens between us! (don’t feel obliged to reply I just wanted to tell u this :))” I responded nicely and then she said “stay safe and take care”. I thought that was odd considering everything she said prior. We haven’t talked since. Now Im unsure how to act around her.

[bobalife]

You have every right to how you feel no matter what situation because it’s your feelings. What matter is what we do with those feelings. I’m sorry this happened, it’s confusing and not cool of her… sounds like she don’t know what she wants perhaps… but I would suggest just keeping your distance unless she wants to put in more effort and can tell you what she really wants. But if you wanna be honest you’re upset about the situation, you have every right since she was being hot and cold… but just be prepare and respectful on the outcome if she don’t wanna continue…

[bobalife]

Or maybe she has commitment problems… or scare? There’s a lot of theories but you can ask her if you wanna know.

[ColHathi]

That sounds to me like she wants... something. At least a friendship, I figure, with how she worded all of that in the second to last message. I don't know what you said following that, but either she thinks you still don't want to go back to chatting and being friends, or she's letting you say when you're ready to go back to being friends. Either way she very clearly likes you.

Anyway, a friendship should be the priority anyway. I would argue that you can't have a great romantic relationship without you also being able to be great friends. Then you can see where the relationship develops from there. If you rush it, there's a big risk of you ending up getting hurt when you find out that you weren't really all that compatible after all.

[ColHathi]

As for getting angry and hurt... I would be angry that she got cold with you immediately after your long chat, but not because she rejected you (not that that isn't hurtful). That's her prerogative, and I'm sure she has her reasons. Getting cold with you is harsh of her, but she probably didn't mean to hurt you, so I hope you'll keep that in mind.

[OddBeMe]

I mean…you’re allowing yourself to be walked all over. All she doin is texting if you think of it. She’s leading you on perhaps and keeping you as her bitch. But wouldn’t most people if given the chance?

[jennifer_bloom]

It looks like she wanted to play the field and explore her options and when you gave in too soon, she decided she wasn’t totally invested in you as an option. A guy from church said you don’t know who somebody is until you are married to them. She did not know you as a partner, only as an idea in her head. It’s why I recommend getting to know people before drawing conclusions about who you want and don’t want.

[Avicenna]

Youn should act businesslike with her and talk to other women.

[Crankor]

She prob doesn't really know what she wants. Def not a relationship.. just keep doing what your doing. Lose feelings and see if you even want to be friends.

[HighSky]

She's not attracted to you.

What's your height? Under 6 foot? There's your answer

[bobalife]

Please ignore this asker as this is very discouraging and unfair. This height obsession guys have issues on here is not always the main problem why things don’t work out.