I’d probably combine last names, because I like the sound of my name since it’s French so it sounds all fancy if you pronounce it correctly but if whoever I marry has an ugly sounding last name I wouldn’t take it.
My old social studies teacher married a guy named Borger, so now whenever I think of her I’d think of a literal burger? I’d never want that to be me ☹️
Use your husband/wife’s last name
Keep your last name and let your wife/husband use your last name
Combine both you and your wife/husbands last name
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What would you do with your last name if you got married?
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Personally for me it would depend on the consequences of my situation at the time.
I may not change my last name for legal reason (professions, degree, etc). But I may change it if my parents divorced and I don't want to associate myself from either parents (if my relationship with them become disconnected etc).
If I change my surname to my partner but want to keep my previous surname. I'll likely move my surname to my middle name and my partner as mine.
But if I don't want to change it all the way... If my partner don't mind. I may have their surname as my middle name instead.
Truth be told my middle name is only a little. So changing it doesn't really bother me 😅
Now if my partner want to change their surname to mine... Then they may. What matter the most is that we are both happily married and to not cause confusions for the children (if we have any).
But if my partner try to force me to change my surname (depending on the situation) when I can't. I would likely break the engagement... For the most part I believe you should communicate with your partner about this frist before getting married. 😅 If this portion is a deal breaker ofcourse...
My partner and I both hyphenated our names. I'm Armenian and my last name is my heritage and I didn't want to lose that. His last name is his heritage and he didn't want to lose it either, so we both hyphenated. We're a new family, and that's our name together, it's who we are. I have many friends who've done that, I have tons who just never changed at all. I know more people who don't take their husband's name after marriage than I know people who do.
I'm not real keen on my last name but my ex wife wanted to take my name so that was fine. I don't like it when people add there last names together and hyphenate them, only because the people I've known do it are very pretentious people and somehow they think it makes them sound more posh, twats 😂. If I were to ever marry again, doubtful, if she had a good last name I might be tempted to take hers. I have no wish to keep my family name going but that's a reflection on how I feel about my family. I have even considered changing my name by deed poll after my parents die.
My spouse prefers to keep using her familial maiden name in business matters although we periodically hyphenate the combined Surnames.
I personally have dropped a letter from the ethnic spelling of my own surname as I was born HERE not Eastern Europe, and American custom is to TRY to phonetically pronounce EVERY consonant and people 'trip over' that 'j' in the middle! Oddly, only my college Japanese Judo Master was the ONLY non-European to EVER pronounce it ethnically correctly on his first try! I was stunned~
My view on marriage and love has changed in the past year, so I'm pretty agnostic to the subject. But if I were to get married I would consider it a massive disrespect for my wife not to take my name.
Like I wouldn't marry her without her taking my name on. It's that important. And she really can't argue against that because what can she say? "Does it really matter that much?"
Because if she's saying it doesn't matter that much then why not just take his name, because he cares and she doesn't think it's that important anyways.
The Truth behind why she cares will come out eventually. Majority of the time is not liking his last name or some feminist bullshit. Pretty much no woman genuinely cares about it outsidethose two reasons
My mom did not take my dad's last name. I don't want to reveal my last name on here, but my parents gave me my mother's last name. My dad's last name is kind of awkward and does not go well with my first name. (yes, some Indians do have middle and last names)
Adopting the males last name is a tradition that has more meaning than the name itself. It enables a new identity, the identity of you as his wife and his woman. Carrying your husband's name identifies you in Society. I've seen some women hyphenate their names with their maiden names but I think it's just more complicated that way. I also like my last name and identify myself with that someone I get married I'm not sure what I would want to do but it's more important that you love the person and being their wife than the name that you have!
Most Spanish-speaking married couples combine their last names with a hyphen as a tradition to preserve both family's names. For example, if the man's last name is Perez and the woman's last name is Mendoza, when they get married both of their last names become Perez-Mendoza. I like that idea. Also, OP, just note that not taking a man's last name at all in marriage is a bad idea because it brings huge shame on the man, which is something you really need to consider if you love your man. Society's thinking has not caught up to modern thinking so it is still seen as weird. Using both last names, like I mentioned before, is the best way to go and is socially acceptable.
I'm not changing my last name for anyone or anything but Ben if that means monster can track me down through witness protection because I come from an actual line of nobles and counts and also because my grandfather was badass who woj a lot of awards and decorations during operation Barbarossa. Love my last name, glad to die with it.
I wouldn’t ask my wife to do anything with her last name but I would ask her if it’s okay if I add her last name after my last name.
In fact, I would like the wedding to involve two walking paths to the center from opposite directions on the outside, and on one of them, my parents walking me to the center, and on the other one, my fiancée’s parents walking her to the center in the other pathway. That just sounds a lot more special to me. That is of course when I am engaged and the wedding is on.
Depending on what she would like to do, I would either 1. Like her to take mine 2. Keep our own 3. Take hers The thing is, I don't like hyphenated names much. It would be kinda funny if I were to marry someone from a completely different ethnic background. I'm of mixed ethnicity heritage and my last name is the French Canadian spelling, not the French mainland spelling. So, imagine me taking my last name and hyphenating it with Tanaka for instance. It would be silly.
I like my surname but my dads side of the family have ruined the name for me that I’d be more than happy to take my some day husbands surname. Even before that I’d have taken my husbands surname. I pray to God that it’s not some awful surname though.
If my wife had a very amazing name I might throw out the crazy idea of just adopting one anothers last name and instead of name washing out one or the others name why not just tack the others family name along with if both are that unique and cool or just last name swap :) Modern like marriage ideologies are so boring now a days XD.
I'm Icelandic and here our surnames has an added suffix of either -sson or -dóttir for males and females respectively. So if I marry another Icelander then my last name will remain the same because it won't make sense for me to take his (sson means son of someone, for example my brother's name is Sigurður Rúnarsson and mine is Jóhanna Rúnarsdóttir) but if I maary a non Icelander I dont mind taking his last name.
I've thought about this and I'd change depending on his last name, if I think it's ugly, I'll keep mine. But I'd most likely take his I already have a long ass name so combining it would be too much.
I like my last name, it's very uncommon and there's even a building in Canada with it on it. Even though most people can't pronounce it, I still love it. In case you were wondering, my last name is Steadward. So, I'd probably keep my name or hyphenate it if my husband has a short last name.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
I would keep my last name and I would want my wife and children to share the same name. There are many practical reasons why a family should all have the same last name and I think hyphenating just creates many issues that can easily be avoided.
I would not marry a woman who would not willingly take my name.
I'm completely flexible on this issue. I would actually be totally cool with being like The Second Gentleman and the VP and having us both just keep our own names. But if she wants mine, I will gladly share it with her. The only thing I won't do is give up my own last name. I like my name!!
@bubblespopcorn Well, there's nothing wrong with it, in my opinion. I have nothing against her name (well, assuming the hypothetical "her" doesn't have a really weird name); it's just that I really like my own and I'm proud of it.
But what do you think about couples hyphenating and basically doing a "merger"? Lol
Hmm, I don't particularly care, but it would be odd to switch last name. It's also frenchish, so I wouldn't mind something cooler. If my wife has a last name like "Dragonslayer" or something, I'll take it, lol. "Bush" on the other hand, no thanks.
My mother refused to change her last name. I was born with a middle name and by the time I turned 18 I officaly removed it in the name registry. My brother did the same around this time.
Now I am scared to tell her and her parents about it, because they will get offended. It makes me frustrated because thet have no right to be mad about that non of them have a middle name so its unfair to impose that on me. Ladies please don't give your children a middle name
@doopayo it makes my name long and complicated so If I say my name or have someone say it they will have a difficult time rembember and pronounce it. If I have children they will not inherit the name so its kind of pointless. In a militarry or profetioal setting I will want to represnt my family by using my last name. The middle name just gets in the way. Its also a vilation of my cultre and our tradition. When I say my middle name people will assume I was born a out of wedlock which is embarrasing. I also think people should jsut simply have one indevidual name and one family name thats it.
If it ever happens id take his name no desire to hold on to mine. Dont want to combine them it would be too long.. get rid of the old (me) on to bigger and better things (us as a couple)!
I’m keeping my last name sis, especially if his last name is ugly😂😂😭😭✋🏾✋🏾
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
whether your last name and your husband's last name are good or bad. If you are married, you will carry the surname of the man you married. it's that clear. There's no point in getting married if you don't carry the man's last name. Then sit at home and carry your father's surname.
I would keep my last name and my woman is free to have my name if she wishes. I would prefer yes. And luckily, she wants it aswel. Well, when the time comes that is lol.
I wasn't given my father surname at birth. So since he passed I've been contemplated changing my name by deed pole... It would be a nice way to honour him
I'd take his last name and use it. But in my culture it's not uncommon to keep your maiden name as well as take on your husband's. But the husband's name does come first.
I could care less if a woman changes her name or not. In China, women don’t change their name. Kids usually pick up the father’s name. Do whatever makes you happy.
There's no way I'm loosing last name. I'm down to combine them and toss my middle name though.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
I would never be with a female who doesn't completely take my name and no man should be. Good ahead and ask them and drop them if they have any other ideas
but isn't your goal to stop evil men and evil white people by constantly complaining about them until all of your black brothers and mostly sisters have been alerted to how bad they are? I mean, that's your goal her, right?
@doopayo you actually did ask lol. you asked a question, and people are sharing their thoughts so there's no need to be bitter. Not everyone agrees on things, that's fine but cmon... lol.
Probably combine the two. I don't wanna get rid of my last name.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
Change it something comical just mess with her. Like if her name was Connie I'd change my last name to Lingus. And then tell her if she doesn't take my last name she doesn't really love me. 🤣
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