What do you like to be complimented on more: appearance, personality, or intelligence?

Question

Examples:
- Appearance: "I like your outfit today!" or "You're very beautiful/handsome."

- Personality: "You have a good sense of humour." or "I like that you're open-minded and easy to talk to."

- Intelligence: "You're the smartest person I know." or "I admire that you take time to think things through."

And, yes, I do know there are more areas on which to compliment a person. But, out of these three, which one do you prefer to be complimented on?

Bonus points if you phrase the compliment the way you want to hear it.

lumos · Accepted Answer

I'd rank them like this: first personality, then intelligence, and lastly appearance.
For someone to compliment my personality, it means that they've taken the time to get to know me and really appreciate an aspect of who I am, to the point where they felt compelled to actually let me know. I'd consider that to be very high praise, even if the compliment itself is simple. Such as "you're a really caring person, I love how devoted you are to your friends and family and how you always think about them". Next I'd prefer to be complimented on my intelligence, because I do take pride in being as knowledgeable as I can be. And lastly, my appearance. I don't value compliments based on appearance very highly. They seem to be thrown around quite easily, even by strangers who don't really know you. These are also the types of compliments that are the most difficult to consider genuine. Is that guy complimenting my looks just because he wants to get into my pants? Is that girl saying I have pretty hair just because she's drunk out of her mind and she'd never even look at my hair when sober? And so on...

klyuh · Accepted Answer

I voted for appearance, but it's only a slight preference over the other two options. I enjoy receiving compliments about my appearance because it's a sensitive area for me. I believe that I'm fairly attractive as I am right now, but I used to struggle with accepting the way I looked, so that's partially why I'm always craving validation of my beauty. However, I also enjoy compliments on my personality and intelligence, because beauty is nothing without substance.

MarianneF · Accepted Answer

I really don't mind a lot about personality or appearance (I am usually on point or more -rather caught dead than simple) But being recognized for my performance and my wits is something that is super rewarding given
the present state of affairs at the workplace.

Nik1hil · Accepted Answer

You try so hard to feel the warmth,
you try so hard, to let emotions flood you;
but your brain is to smart to let you down,
and your knowledge won't ever let you drown;

What you crave is so pure and serine.
Like the glittering stars in the cosmic stream;
You want to experience that love
to be called his only beloved;

You want that pull to be so strong,
That it makes you question all your forms;
passion of love and crazy chase,
even if it ends in a blazing crash;

end of the day, you are in doubt.
will you ever feel love or asexual drought;
you aren't afraid to live alone.
because you know how to be happy on your own;

Let me tell you a secret right now.
let lingerie wrap you, like a Christmas gift;
let the guy unwarp it, and adore the beauty you behold.
form dusk till dawn, let the eternity unfold!.. ;

Kilapan · Accepted Answer

I'm totally sure about my intelligence
My personality pleases certain people, some are indifferent and others are upset, people with whom I do not make compatible simply do not interest me.
From my appearance I'm not so sure, so I like it more when they praise me for my appearance.
In any case, it depends on who praises you and the context.
If I start having deep feelings for a person I will prefer that person to stand out my personality.

Greetings and thanks for accepting my invitation :)

lilyl02 · Answer

I like both appearance and intelligence, intelligent matters more to me but I still like when someone says I look pretty I feel less insecure. I love getting, "You're so clever" or "You're so mature and ambitious." I get ones similar to those, just synonyms of those words. I also like "You're like, really pretty." or "You look so stoic"

PoliceLivesMatter · Answer

Of course I want my personality to be complimented on because it’s who I am and NO ONE in the past, present, or future will ever have it. There’s probably several millions of people that look like me and you as well 😅 but personality and the slight idiosyncrasies I do, are only unique to me, makes me special. Here’s what I would like someone to say
“I really like who you are,” or “I really like your character.”

taleswapper · Answer

I'm a bit wary of compliments about my appearance, because I know I'm not good looking in any conventional or objective sense. And I'm a sociopath, though a well-socialized one, so compliments about my personality are usually a bit off, though I like to know I pass well. But admire my brains? "Ned, you tell the BEST stories! Full of humor, and always with a message that sort of sneaks in..." I'll wriggle like a puppy. :)

wadewilson616 · Answer

I think people tend to want compliments in ways they get them less. Traditionally speaking women get more compliments on their looks, so they probably want more in other areas because of that. The exact opposite applies more often to men.

Cosytoasty · Answer

Intelligence.

I think personality and looks are the easy things to compliment. Intelligence however, is much harder to quantify so a genuine compliment about that is more meaningful to me (basically it feels like more of an achievement).

JustAnotherGirlie · Answer

Intelligence. I’ve always wished to be capable of much more intellectually. So a man who thinks I am smart is very complimentary

jersos1 · Answer

Intelligent question!

I would prefer the third one as I believe I am not like the others. I am not a very good speaker, nor do I have am impeccable sense of fashion and style.

However I am bit of a nerd, so hearing about a compliment on intelligence definitely boosts my morale.

LegateLanius · Answer

The only women to ever compliment my appearance are ones that are old enough to be my mom or are in relationships. I have not been complimented for anything else in person. To me it feels like a lie coming from any of them. Women my own age that are single don't pay attention at all to me

GingerGuy · Answer

We guys rarely get complimented (compared to women), so anything is nice to hear. But perhaps even rarer is compliments on appearance, so I'd love to here if someone thinks I'm attractive.

avgBinch · Answer

I feel like personality compliments aren't given often because not many people know you for you, but everyone has seem your appearance and has an opinion on it. So personality compliments are really nice because the person noticed these things about you and it might be something you never realized about yourself.

imchrxs · Answer

I have low self esteem and think I’m ugly so to get compliments about appearance is something I’d like more often...

markscott · Answer

Compliments make you day better, no matter what kind.

reixun · Answer

Personality > looks > intelligence I know I’m smart at what I know best, I don’t get validated by intelligence compliments.

pinkzoesbb · Answer

“You have a great sense of humor based on your appearance.” LOL

Gypsy_x · Answer

Nothing more flattering than compliments about my personality.

Twinrova · Answer

Are you trying to find out what people care about most in other people, lol?

karahiri · Answer

i guess personality. I don't know. compliments are nice. :3

AlwaysBelieving · Answer

Appearance because I never get told that to my face by a gal.  I get compliments on my intelligence a fair amount (more than what makes me comfortable actually).

Anonymous · Answer

All my life I have been complimented on my personality and intelligence. I would like to know how it feels to be admired for looks.
If I were a guy, I wouldn't care but as a girl I would like to experience that.

Stamps · Answer

Personality, hands down. Appearance can be changed. Intelligence can be changed. Personality can't.

What do you like to be complimented on more: appearance, personality, or intelligence?

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