How cool are you with strangers talking to you in public?

Question

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

These seem to be the only reasons strangers say something to you in public anymore:

They're being morally self-righteous and disagree with something you're doing and want to try to get you stop doing it ("You know that by feeding those birds you're killing the animals." Uh huh. Fuck off, lady. Mind your own damn business.)
They're about to ask you to sign some petition, donate some money to some cause.
Sell you something.
Beg for money.
They're mentally ill and pretty much have no one to talk to so they love anyone who will listen to their nonsensical ramblings.
They're mentally ill and reaaaally angry. These types have been randomly assaulting and robbing and stabbing and pepperspraying people in my city and others.
They want to ask you out.

So that's 7 reasons I can think of where you don't want to have anything to do with them. Maaaybe, 1 in 10 (if I'm being very generous in that stat) actually just wants to have a chat, say something pleasant. But most of the time it's dead silence, even in an elevator. No one has anything to say to one another. People just go on their phones or stare off into the distance. Small talk and friendly chit chat is pretty much dead.

How do I feel about it? Mixed. I honestly don't have a strong opinion one way or the other, but I can tell you that every time I gave someone eye contact, or acted pleasant, I realized it was usually a mistake and they were one of the bullet points above, and I'm over it now.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Really depends on the situation and where i am. if it makes sense for them to talk to me i don't have a problem with it. but if it's just super random like someone on the bus i'd be uncomfortable and weirded out a little and kinda ask myself why are they talking to me and if there's anything wrong with them. because where i live people don't do that except old people usually so it's kinda weird when someone does it like that. if it's in a country where it's normal to do that, i'm not weirded out or anything but i'm generally a bit taken a back a little because i'm not used to that and i'd probably secretely want them to shut up and be annoyed, unless they're cool and i want to talk to them or something

D_Bone_Steak · Accepted Answer

I go out of my way to avoid people talking to me, and 9 times out of 10 a stranger trying to talk to me equals what I would consider some sort of predatory behavior... anything like trying to bum change off of me, trying to sell me something (anything that does not sell itself is a shit deal), sexual interest (which happens too often while I'm out somewhere with my wife), etc. I find it annoying.

Now when I actually get talked to and it's just someone shooting the shit, it's cool... until I start to sense them prodding for something. The sales pitch always comes at some point. "I work for a modeling agency and you look the part for bla bla bla" I don't care, not my problem... if I was looking to be a model I'd apply for the job. The dude probably just wants to see my cock.

It's one of the things I really miss about living in Japan... where people would generally leave you alone.

BullShark · Accepted Answer

As a guy who was pretty much a loner and introvert for majority of his life, for the longest time, I suffered from social anxiety. I sucked at interacting with strangers and making new friends, and I'd always end up fumbling over my own words.

With time, I learned not to take everything too literally and that there are a lot of like-minded people like myself out there as well, who quite possibly might be, just as nervous to talk to me as I am, and if it's me who breaks the ice first, they'll probably appreciate it more. So yeah. Now, I still prefer keeping to myself when I'm around strangers, but my interactions have improved a lot. There are times when I feel like I'd rather be somewhere else, but then there are also times when I'm thankful I talked to this stranger and maybe, became friends with them

Keyboardkat · Answer

I have no problem with it if they seem normal and friendly. But then, I'm a guy. I could well understand a girl's wary feelings about this, because (assuming the stranger is a guy) guys usually want something from a girl, like they might want her phone number, or they might want a hookup , or something. On the other hand, maybe they REALLY DO want to know how far it is to Mulberry Street, or whatever it is.

OlderThanILook · Answer

I'm not going to freak out because someone talks to me in public. I might be annoyed based on what they're saying, but I really don't understand why people get uncomfortable because someone is simply talking to them. Like maybe stay inside forever then.

FriendlyDrugDealer · Answer

I’m perfectly fine with it. Striking up a conversation out of nowhere is one of the skills from my years in customer service and sales. I’m fine with it and I can keep the conversation flowing if I’m up to it but I usually let them decide the momentum

Sour-rose · Answer

I usually let them until they get on my nerves. I'm not much for talking to strangers but I've lived a time where i talked to no one because I can't trust 'em. I still don't trust 'em now but it's nice to engage with people I don't know now and they compliment my blue lipstick and say i look cute.

sage2021 · Answer

For some reason, the people in line with me at the grocery store like striking up a conversation with me. One time this lady we only buying a basket of strawberries. She saw me looking at them and must have felt compelled to explain her purchase to me. They were for her sick daughter at home that wanted strawberries. Then she continues on and on about her entire illness. So, I get a variety of conversations in line at the market. I don't mind though. 🙂

Phoenix98 · Answer

Perfectly fine it, hell I talk to people in other cars while waiting on stop lights also talk to people on the curb in my truck while waiting on stop lights. I have this one old guy who drives a black pick up who chats me up whenever he pulls beside me.

NathanDavis · Answer

it's not an issue...

not only I am very used to that, but it is also the most normal thing around some places I've lived, people are very open like that and just chit-chat casually with one another... lol (Mexico)

TheorionMage · Answer

Depends upon their conversation and prudishness--- as long as its 'reciprocal'.
No 'one sided' candor!
Ultimately, racially and genderally... We're ALL 'pink' in the middle!
Just a 'sister' or 'brother' from a different mother ~

Dazed0N0Confused · Answer

I just have one of those faces. Random people talk to me all the time while I'm out. I don't mind making conversation, I consider it a good way to pass time & maybe brighten someone else's day

ethanallen · Answer

I am comfortable talking to strangers whether men or women. Sadly, there is a lot of mental illness in the community and it only takes about three minutes before I realize someone I am speaking with has untreated mental illness.

purplepoppy · Answer

I'm cool with it. You can meet some interesting people here from all around the world who for some reason feel they need to confess their lives story to me.

2Wheels · Answer

It doesn't bother me at all. Usually it's people complimenting my hair or asking about my motorcycle if I'm on it. So, they work as great conversation starters I think.

TheVigilantOne · Answer

Nope, I hate it when people try to talk to me, I have severe social anxiety and I just clam up I can’t help it, I just walk on and ignore them I know it’s rude and I feel so bad for doing it but I just can’t stand the anxiety.

idk87334F · Answer

I'm cool with it. It's just that if the conversation gets too long, then that's where I'm not that cool since I'm not that good at conversation lol.

bubblegunnn · Answer

I dont mind at all talking w strangers in public.. i even started the convo first sometimes but only to older people, kids or female.. but i wouldn't mind if a guy tried to talk to me too

PJH359 · Answer

I’m an introvert and don’t like it at all. I’m sure my body language and the way I walk quickly past people looking down or straight ahead makes that very clear:

Amy10223 · Answer

Im very cool if they ask me for directions or ask a question about a place. If they begin asking me personal questions that would be uncomfortable for me.

dustybiker · Answer

I talk to people. But the ones that like to talk are easy to find. I leave boring people alone. No fun anyway. : )

JustADudePlayinADude · Answer

Pretty chill. I have no problem ending conversations early if I need to, so I'll willingly partake. Exception is if I'm clearly busy, like if I'm doing school work or something.

ce-rose · Answer

not cool at all. i hate it so much. it's insanely uncomfortable. but i'm from a culture where small talk basically doesn't exist

PeteBy · Answer

Fine as long as it's a genuine question like asking for directions. I just do not get people who talk to you for no reason whatsoever.

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

I'm fine with it. Cautiously friendly. But there's always crazies, so I'm on guard when someone I don't know approaches me.

Pinay_ako · Answer

I have no problems talking to anyone. Anywhere… sharing a laugh or a seat or just smiling.

ZS007 · Answer

not cool. it makes me uncomfortable and nervous. I would be fidgeting endlessly.

BlueScorpio · Answer

I'm okay with it but inside it I'm nervous lol I just act calm and polite.

Jaximus-Lion · Answer

I am very cool with it, i don't mind it actually

MarkRet · Answer

I'm fine with it, as long as they don't get too smarmy and invasive.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Im all for talking. Just dont touch me without consent

LazerBean · Answer

I'm good with it, and it's very common where I live.

Red-Blaze · Answer

Pretty cool if they speak sign If not most likely they think I am mostly lost my marbles

josephinelcajon · Answer

I have no problem! I feel I am very social but definitely not in a party way.

Citizenkirk · Answer

Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet. 💃🤝🕺

jshm2 · Answer

I tend to talk to nothing but strangers most of the time.  Part of the job.

bolverk · Answer

I'm fine with it, I lived in many places through work so I've had to get used to talking to strangers.

humanearth · Answer

Its natural for me, I like talking to anyone

exitseven · Answer

It depends. If it is a hot looking girl it is cool. A urine stained wino i could do without.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Fine with me! That could be how they lose their stranger status.

sheikalana · Answer

I hate being approached by strangers in general but also depends what they're asking.

OfDeath · Answer

I'm totally fine with it. If you see me in public, say hi, stop for a chat. I'm a friendly guy.

Blueeyes81 · Answer

I like to be left alone. I view it as an intrusion but will engage in small talk as societal norms dictate.

Zolly99999 · Answer

It's part of my job as a service technician.. lol I light up any room I walk in lol

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

I prefer if they didn't, but it doesn't ruin my day when it happens.

AsaKyo · Answer

I'd rather they stay in their lane and leave me alone unless I wanna talk to them.

maximumpower · Answer

Depends upon what it's about. Small talk - no problem. Anything more and it becomes uncomfortable.

Anonymous · Answer

I hate the people who try to get you to give money for a cause their so aggressive.

Dnice1 · Answer

I don't mind but it doesn't happen very often

Gavin_Rowe · Answer

Always nervous but I can pull it off almost a the time

zagor · Answer

Fine with me. I've often made small talk with people while waiting in line, etc.

collie22 · Answer

i talk with people i don't know all the time :)

Valso · Answer

I don't have a problem with that. Talking to a girl I like - that's harder.

Staximus · Answer

I don't care, as long as they are not tweakers

OnlinePeanut22 · Answer

It depends on what is. If inside ok like supermarket. Other time not.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Totally depends what they are saying to me. Talking bull will turn me off.

Fuentes · Answer

Only speak to me when I'm working if not I'm not tryna talk to you lol

Anonymous · Answer

I'm totally fine with that so long it's not religion or politics or their family drama.

The_Shadow_Dweller · Answer

Very cool about it.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I love to talk, so it is not a problem.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

It depends who it is, if it’s a girl I don’t care

RavVid · Answer

As long as you aren't a homeless person I'm cool.

cth96190 · Answer

That happens to me every day, as part of my work.

How cool are you with strangers talking to you in public?

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