What does he mean by he wants things to stay the same with us but doesn't want to be in a relationship?

[Anonymous]

I dated this guy things were going great we never fight or argue. One day out of the blue he broke up with me(in a text message)we didn't speak for almost a week then he texted me telling me he had strong feelings for me. We started hanging back out and doing things like we always did when we were a couple. After a while of doing this he asked me how I felt about him and I honestly answered that I had fallen for him. He started to act different after that he then tells me he likes me he really does he just don't want a relationship he wants things to stay the way they are. What does he mean by that? Am I just the girl until something better comes along? Am I being used as a booty call? Please help it is driving me crazy

[wkstep2]

it sounds like your gut is telling you the right thing... If he wants to be a couple without a couple he is just dragging you along. using the fact that you aren't "in a relationship" to either go out and have fun without thinking about how you feel about what he is doing or waiting for that situation to arise. I would tell him to man up or pack it up. Unless he can give you a truly honest answer as to why he doesn't want to be in a relationship. And by that I mean he shouldn't start his answer with "uhhhh... well I" if there is a good enough reason he knows it and if you make it known that you want and deserve to know he shouldn't have to stall to think up his reason

[AlanHB]

He broke up with you by text message? What a COWARD!

Add to his cowardly ways asking for you to be his sex object until someone better comes along.

[Anonymous]

Relationships are more demanding. He doesn't want that. He enjoys your company. He wants to continue to enjoy your company. Do you enjoy his? He is not using you. He is telling you he doesn't want a relationship in the sense of a commitment. If you choose to see him anyway that is up to you. Using you is telling you he wants to be in a relationship to get sex when in fact he doesn't honor the relationship at all. He isn't misleading you so no that isn't using you. You just have to determine if this arrangement works for you. If not then don't see him. This is a two way thing.