My boyfriend didn't say happy anniversary, or get me anything, is that bad?

[Anonymous]

he knew it was our anniversary. he was "away" for 3 years, and i know he didn't have money for anything... though his dad has given him money and such but he spends it on video games. ok, so he was in prison, i know he's trying to enjoy things he couldn't do for 3 years, but anyways. i got all dressed up nice, he dressed as well as he could, and i took him out to dinner, paying for everything (nice girlfriend i am). he seemed in a hurry to get through dinner, because he wanted to watch the movie i got him as my anniversary gift to him, that he wanted soooo badly. anywas, we ordered what we wanted. he took only a few bites of his dinner, then excused himself to the bathroom. he doesn't have a cell phone, so he couldn'r of been texting anyone. he smiled at me a couple times, but as soon as i was finished eating, he was ready to go, even though i had a coupon for a free dessert. anyways, we just boxed our stuff and left. a made a few wrong turns on the way back to his house, he was getting a bit upset, cuz he REALLY wanted to watch that movie. anways, we got home, and he decided to finish his dinner there. i told him how i was upset that he didn't say thank you for dinner, he said that he though he had told me, but he really didn't, then he said sorry and started hugging and kissing me. after, we had to go watch the movie, which sucked in my opinion... but i started tearing up, cuz i was upset that he didn't say happy anniversary or even as much as make me a card. is it bad that i feel this way, am i9 over reacting? i waited 3 years for him to get out of prison, and he didn't even try to make OUR anniversary special, it seemed to be all about him. he was very affectionate though after i told him how i felt. it was kinda rude of him though to talk about our sex life at dinner, asking if i had my lingerie with me and saying i need to initiate more. what do you all think?

[Screenwriter]

You have no idea how being in prison has affected this guy and he's not telling you anything. I think it would be all about him readjusting to being outside and anniversaries and saying thank you, things that aren't in anyone's mind while in prison, just aren't on his mind.

I'm not saying I think his behavior is good, and the fact that he has no job or anything else going on may make him feel he's less of a man. Since I expect he's near your age, you might consider how he behaved before prison. If there's no connection to how he's acting now, there could be multiple causes.

My guess is this guy has been traumatized and if he's not in a prison recovery program where he's getting therapy, I think you're going to suffer through more of this.

I'm thinking you're in for more waiting and suffering with this guy. I think you should get therapy because you don't have support through this change in both of your circumstances. Get recommendations from a good therapist on how you should proceed.

I think you both have a long road toward recovery.

[SarahsSummer]

Sounds like a loser. You could do better.