My boyfriend doesn't believe me when I tell him I love him.

[Anonymous]

I have been dating this guy for a year and a half. .But when I tell him I love him he says"its not true" every time. I told him I wish he would just say me 2. Its always "its not true" Its starting to bug me. He was the one to tell me he loved from the get go. He is a guy and he doesn't say it often but I don't tell him what he tells me. I mean should I just ignore it - is it a guy thing or does he really believe I don't love him. I show him all the time- there is no reason for him to believe that I don't love him. Help What should I do- What do I have to do to prove myself? I have done a lot.

[matthewm]

Well, first off, I'd like to establish that "love" is a very strong word (obviously). Now, have you thought to ask him WHY he always answers that way? Yes? Why? No? Maybe you should ask him. From what I can discern, it could mean that he doesn't think you love him or that he loves you more than you love him. I don't know. I wouldn't force him to say something that he doesn't mean if that's what you were saying, but if something hurts or offends you, you do have the right to tell him. And exercise that right! Tell him more of how you feel about it and I think he'll begin to understand your sentiments.

[Asker]

I tell a lot how I feel. He tells me in his ways too. I have asked him why he says that- he just doesn't think a gal like me could love a guy like him. Basically I am out of his league. From what his family and friends say. My friends say I deserve better. I love him regardless.

[matthewm]

"He tells me in his ways too." Does this mean that you'd like him to be more straight-forward with his feelings? It seems like he still has "cold feet" about the relationship. You've been together for a year, I'm not sure why he hasn't discovered what you truly feel. Maybe it's just that he needs time. Just keep showing him that you love him and I think you'll be okay. If you're hurt by the fact that he doesn't understand how you feel, find a way to make him understand.