Do women value monogamy more than men?

Question

Seems to me that most women on average value their relationships more than men and that there are less willing to share their men around with other women wear as most men kind of want their cake and eat it too most men always want a variety of women and are never satisfied with what they have they always want something different it seems as if Society taught women to be princesses and virgins until marriage while men are allowed to sleep with whomever they want.

D_Bone_Steak · Accepted Answer

Switch the genders and you'd have my initial opinion... but that would be generalizing so I'll drop the gender focus.

The importance of a relationship is for exclusivity. Given your opinion of men, you've ran into a lot of men that isn't focused on having an 'exclusive relationship' meaning they exclude the option of sex with others in favor of building a deeper than sex relationship with one person exclusively... shielding that relationship from the damage that including others can cause.

My initial opinion of women can be based of the same premise. You and I are merely working of anecdotal experience though, and the gender basis of our opinion might have a lot to do with the perspectives our genders has granted us with... I don't deal with men, maybe you don't deal with women in exclusive relationships.

My bias, tends to view women as desperate for obtaining relationship status in order to advance a grasp on keeping him hers, until she can monkey branch to a new guy she has on the backburner... the cake and eating it too. My opinion on men is that if they didn't really want a relationship to begin with, he might placate to her desire of wanting him to be exclusive, just to get some sex... but never had any real intentions of being exclusive from the start. Does that sound familiar? If so, we may have found the common ground we could base some reasoning on. Like what is the importance of wanting exclusivity... her for attention, thus finding more on the DL, or him for sex, thus finding more on the DL perhaps?

Of course if the male and female both want exclusivity, I doubt the value of monogamy is less for either the male or the female. They'll focus their primary desire, attention or sex respectively, and obtain their secondary through the same person as well, attention or sex respectively... but if attention is sought elsewhere, it could equal sex, if sex is sought elsewhere, so too with the attention it can bring.

Benedek38 · Accepted Answer

Why ask a question if you only want validation of your claim?

You seemingly reject the answers of everyone not saying "Cus men are trash!"

Men are fundamentally polygamours, because they are biologically programmed to spread their genes. Obviously this is an oversimplification, but a successful male in nature is one that has many offsprings.

Women are hypergamous, because they need the support of the strongest, most stable available men to raise their children.

Both of these are parts of the natures of the respective sexes, and both of these are horrible things when taken to the extremes.

And women cheat as much as men, they initiate 70-80% of divorces, they commit 50% of reported domestic violence... seriously, stop being a prejudicial manhater, and grow the fuck up!

Dannii · Accepted Answer

I will generalize this. Some people date to satisfy their emotional needs. Some date to satisfy physical needs. When an emotional need is not met, a person might still linger around if he/she is used to being around the other person. When a physical need is not met and the person values this requirement in a relationship, then there is a high chance that he/she will stray. It is a matter of priorities and not so much on gender itself. Women are becoming more independent nowadays as well.
Now, speaking for myself. I've been in two serious relationships, and both of them were cheaters. I value emotional needs. Both of them prioritize physical needs. There you go.

ragequeen · Accepted Answer

I think men are more flexible to be in a monogamous relationship if their needs are met. Yet it could be true that women are raised to be innocent virgins and this is why they want different things, and eventually initiating divorce. I've heard the percentage is higher with women

anmari2001 · Accepted Answer

yes, it seems like women are more about preserving the family, at least this is what i have seen from my experience and other people experiences

Desconhecida · Answer

Most women do. We were raised to - even unintentionally - want a family and fairy tales were told to us with princes wanting only one woman for life.
These days and maybe since the beginning of life, this sounds unrealistic even because people claim humans aren't supposed to be monogamous.
Then again, women are changing and becoming just like the guys when it comes to freedom.

Logorithim · Answer

I wouldn't be so sure about that, not least because it takes two to tango.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Are you asking who cheats more?

englisc · Answer

In general yes, probably. What's mindboggling to me is that feminism encourages this hook-up culture and teaches women that it's empowering, but is it really?

If women prefer monogamy, and the social pressures than enforce this are broken down so that now men can sleep with a bunch of women, who wins in that situation? Promiscuous men obviously. They pump and dump a lot of naive misguided women who jump into bed with them too fast and get what they want, while those women often end up miserable.

Yet most women still support feminism, the liberalisation of the dating market, and they complain about slut-shaming and the fact that men can sleep around but women can't as you have right here. If you want more monogamy and less players, you should argue for more shaming of promiscuity, not less. But women do the opposite.

DJZest · Answer

70 % of divorces are initiated by women; 80 % of child custody goes to the woman completely.

Irrespective of what you "feel", there is a truth that's hard as steel.

Another fact is that women's sexual market value (make of that what you will) goes down as they age; a pretty woman who kept herself a virgin is the most desirable thing to a man.

On the other hand - men become. With advancing age, we become more refined, more skilled and our reanings increase - with these and other factors, our appeal to women increases.

I urge all boys and young men to keep looking forward and work on themselves!

nathanp97 · Answer

Evolutionary speaking it makes sense for men not to want to be with just one woman. If the idea is to produce the most amount of offspring men shouldn't be monogamous. Men would stay with a woman to ensure the offspring survival. Nowadays that isn't needed so much. Female animals have always been more selective because they have a huge burden and energy expenditure for getting pregnant, and thus are more careful with who they mate with.

What you are saying comes from society seems to be more of an evolutionary difference between men and women.

ecfresh · Answer

I feel on average men are more honest in how they feel and act about monogamy than women. I feel like women are pressured by society to be in monogamous relationships and will feel shamed if they are sleeping around. So women are forced to lie and deceive in order to sleep around while their public reputation hinges on playing the perfect monogamous partner. As men have less pressure to be pure, they are more willing to be honest and will hurt their reputation by sleeping around even when in a relationship.

sheezuskist · Answer

Yes, because woman bless there hearts where born with feelings and emotions way more than men were, we are a bit dumb when it comes to things as such but we do want to care just as much, we just need guidance from you in the right way , not our caveman, grunt and groan way

TheFlak38 · Answer

Yeah good joke. With all the options a woman has today. Society taught women to be virgin princesses decades ago! Not today! For the simple reason that you women can bang a billion dicks and still be unsatisfied. Men can't get shit nowadays. We've reached a point where an ugly tinder chick that is no more than a 6 sets up tinder dates with over two thousand men and then makes them compete with each toothier for her ugly face. And of course the one guy that won and was according to HER standards the BEST still went back home with a big set of blue balls because there was no... chemistry. So lets forget the myth that says women value a relationship more than.

GreatnessBack · Answer

It's all historical nature of when people died very easily.
Historically, men are supposed to spread their seed before they die, which was a lot and often, in hopes that he would have children to carry on his legacy.
Historically, women would align themselves to the men who could ensure their survival and the survival of her children, whether he were the biological dad or not, and whether he knows it or not. :P
Historically, people had LOT of children to ensure at least ONE of them would live to adulthood.

Nowadays, that's not the case, but you cannot override millenium of "how it was" in a short time span of 100 years.

That said, both sexes are capable of monogamy and capable on polygamy. It just depends on the person.

OnlyYouKnowThat · Answer

Judging by the number of women who sleep around and cheat on their partners. Judging by the fact that 70% of divorces are initiated by women. I don't think that women are more monogamous or faithful than men.

Nita2585 · Answer

Most guys just exaggerate their sexual experiences, they sleep with five partners and tell their friends that they have had 10 partners! Because, apparently, its more manly.
And women conceal it, if they have had five partners they might tell no one, or tell their friends that they had two partners at past. Its apparently less womanly I don't know why.
So its very hard to say that women are loyal and men are promiscuous generally

devilman666 · Answer

No, women say they do more, but then they cheat as often as men according to most studies now adays. From my personal experience, I'd have to say men value monogamy more. Myself and most of my male friends have been cheated on at one point, yet most of us (me and my friends) haven't ever cheated, as far as I know.

FROZ3N · Answer

I think it really depends on popular culture in the location you live. Additionally, your ethnic or religious culture plays a big role in this. My ethnic culture, being a Syrian and a Muslim, has taught me to strongly value monogamy. All I need to do is find a girl who is the same way.

VIVANT · Answer

No. My impression is that men are more insistent upon women being monogamous while they can be *natural*

I think on individual basis it really doesn’t uppn the person. Some people value monopoly more than others, but I think most people want to be loved and there are many ways to accomplish that within and outside of cultural norms.

bklynbadboy1 · Answer

That is not true men value monogamy just as much as women. I always hear women say things like this but unless your dating women and men then you don't really know. Women are not said is there is just as many cheating women as there is men probably more. The same things that men do women do I'm sure you have a female friend or know one that doing dirt.

djmzes · Answer

Yes  Cuz they are made, that way...

TonyBologna25 · Answer

Biology and almost all studies show that men are more likely to cheat in a monogamous relationship. Having said that, I've seen plenty of hoes out there that will go behind their husbands back and cheat. Then they take the kids. It's a real fucked up thing.

Kemil_Zhoki · Answer

Not sure. In my experience most men in a relationship look but do not touch. Most women, even monogamous ones, have a man or several in reserve in case the current relationship fails. Also, perhaps it is just my circle, but I know far more wives and girlfriends who have cheated on their significant others than men who have.

mattdzz · Answer

I’d say women on average have far more to gain from monogamy, both biologically and financially

LegateLanius · Answer

From what I've witnessed, most men in relationships will look but not touch. Most women will have guys just waiting to get their chance so if she's not happy, she'll monkey bar to the next chump.

thebigc · Answer

It is definitely a double standard but I think a lot of that has to do with potential consequences too. In many areas, pregnancy is more devastating for females than males. That said, it depends on the female or the male. For example, I cut a friend out of my life because I was strictly monogamous and she wanted to hookup with me and the other 6 guys she was seeing casually.

Syrian_survivor · Answer

Uh no
Some women are batshit crazy and will play 10 nice guys around at the same time
And some guys value their one and only woman so much that it hurts when they miss her
It doesn't really matter, maybe it did back in the day but women are becoming more "free" these days so it's kinda equal

Oxxymoron · Answer

Based on my past relationships and my current marriage... girl.. guys have no idea what the word monogamy even is. Jk. Just make sure you find the right guy with the same morals/values as you, like, monogamy.

ChrisTruthseeker · Answer

Not in my experience. I'd say it's pretty equal between the genders. I know more women who have cheated personally, but I only date women so that's the side of it that I see.

lexythelou22 · Answer

I can't speak for anyone but myself, but as long as boundaries are set in the beginning I don't mind a poly relationship with consenting parties.

Cookie8888 · Answer

"Society" No BIOLOGY tought women to be monogamous. A woman spends a lot of time on a child. So fucking everyone and having 100 children is a bad idea.

JayParris · Answer

Men value monogamy in women. Women value monogamy in men.

JoyAndSadness · Answer

I value it too. I can't speak for other, but only for myself, I value monogamy.

Rambler221 · Answer

Yeaaaah, noooo. Most of the people I know who cheated on a spouse / significant other were women. And it is within all male and female genetics to want more than one partner. You get people who cheat and people who don't. Gender really doesn't change that.

pepwave21 · Answer

Probably. Women are so protective and scared that their man is cheating on them. wtf? The old days are over where we needed to depend on a man.

BeMuse · Answer

Women file something like 70% of all divorce papers so obviously not.

Riggers · Answer

I’d say it’s the other way round, most men can be content in a relationship and women are just thots and cheat to date someone better.

WindowLicker · Answer

Studies have shown that a slightly higher percentage of women in the 18-29 age group cheat than men. So that goes against your theory.

princessfromjupiter · Answer

I've definitely met more guys who declared themselves to be polygamous than girls but that might just be because it is more acceptable for guys to be openly slutty...

Wolframium · Answer

I'm in the minority then. Strict monogamy, no sex outside relationships, no casual sex, no shit like that.

kingofthellamas · Answer

Yes I agree. Men are programmed that way. Up until about 50 years ago women had a lot to loose from sex, pregnancy and death. Value culture is taking a while to catch up but I suspect women will become more promiscuous.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

All the trashy girls ie older single moms want relationships and all the actual marriageable women of childbearing age who are interesting to me are taught they need to sleep around thus making them crap like the rest. Really sucks.

tonicandgin · Answer

You should've asked that question while draco malfoy still had his account active

Lance1965 · Answer

Nope. Divorce stats will tell you that especially if you look deeper into why all these divorces happen.

Johnnie1000 · Answer

Only us white men? Men value monogamy as long as women don't screw around. Or should I say white women?

BoobMan · Answer

When you say "value monogamy" do you mean their own monogamy or their partner's monogamy? Because those are two very different things.

LogicBomber · Answer

It’s not about “value”, it’s simply that women are programmed to find a partner and mean are programmed to spread their seed.
It’s not that we don’t value it, it’s that we simply are not programmed to do it.

jacquesvol · Answer

Men get terribly hurt when cheated on. Women get terribly hurt when cheated on.

Max_SS · Answer

I agree but I think it's more so that a woman would be willing to share a high value man with other women than settle for a low value man

genericname85 · Answer

cause women are naturally more dependend on support during the reproductive phase. men don't need support after they reproduced. pretty straight foreward.

bhavy24 · Answer

Many men still exists as per your description but time is changing for both men and women , men are becoming more loyal and many women are just looking for flings

Bananaman177 · Answer

Lots of men are monogamous, lots of women are cheating whores.

UncleJessieRabbit · Answer

It may look like this on the surface, but I can understand that monogamy may be disadvantageous against the man's favor in dating and sex because of the higher demand of one (plus-the-other) with the men's side.

Chaz269 · Answer

You're certainly mistaken. There's no evidence to suggest men are more likely to cheat than women, or vice versa.

tertater · Answer

I'd say no, but I go to a club where couples come to fuck other couples/singles so... I live in a different world than most I'd say.

SarahsSummer · Answer

I don’t think monogamy is a gender specific trait because selfishness isn’t either.

Raven_76 · Answer

I don't think so. So many girls are cold and heartless it's so sad. There's very few good girls out there.

clampfan101 · Answer

It sounds like it most of the time, but not always. I only want one girl in my love life, spending my entire life with her.

Travis754 · Answer

Society is losing its morale through music and movie brainwashing. The kind of values you seek are found in most men of religion. Your average guy off the street might beg to differ though.

worldscolide · Answer

@DJZest is correct. Your feelings on the matter do not matter, not when the divorce rate is what it is.

esotericstory · Answer

Considering the human genome has more female ancestors than male ancestors I would say it would be the opposite.

AbdKilani · Answer

That was when there was no thots and hook ups Now most people fool around like rabbits

jessture · Answer

Yes because to a woman the relationship revolves around her and only her

rickytim · Answer

I was married to one woman for 26 years before she passed away I live alone now till I find a great woman

Do women value monogamy more than men?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Do women value monogamy more than men?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.