Boyfriend fixed my car for me, but charged me for it. Should I refuse to pay?

Question

So my car needed some mechanical repairs, and the quote from the mechanic was a bit out of my price range for now.

My boyfriend is good with the cars, and said he could do it for me and save me a bit of money.

Turns out, he meant labour only, but still expects me to pay for parts.

Is this fair? Surely my boyfriend of a year, who makes more money than I do, can afford to pay for the parts as well?

WalsallGuy90 · Accepted Answer

Somebody has to pay for the parts, you don't just get parts for free. If it was his own car he was fixing he would have had to pay for the parts and do the labour himself, so if it's your car that he fixed then surely it makes sense you should pay for the parts when he's doing the labour for free? He's done you a massive favour and saved you a decent chunk of money, and it seems like you're no being a bit self-entitled for it.

Put it this way. When you go out to places together and you're driving, do you expect him to pay towards your fuel? I'd be surprised if you do.

I'm all for people in relationships doing favours for each other, but there is a limit. He's been incredibly generous by sacrificing his own time to help you out and save you some money, so the best thing you can do is be grateful, pay for the parts that were fixed or replaced, and continue with your relationship, and the next time he needs a favour from you repay him in kind by helping him out then.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

If he was not your boyfriend, you would have been faced with a bill that you could not afford. He offered to help you, he did the labor for free, he is only asking to be reimbursed for what he spent on the parts, and you are complaining. You feel that since he makes more money than you, he can afford to pay for that, and therefore he should pay for it.

By this logic, he should also pay your utility bills and buy you groceries, right? Maybe he should occasionally pay your rent. Is this the way that you think relationships are supposed to work? If you want someone who will take care of you as if you are a little girl who can't take care of herself, what does he get in return?

Think about this from the guy's perspective. How attractive is a girl as a long term partner if this is how she behaves?

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

It's more than fair! He offered to fix your car for you and for cheap... paying for the parts is not asking too much out of you. Hell you should pay for the parts and offer to buy him dinner or something!

Trust me, if you went to a mechanic they sure wouldn't give you that kind of deal.

EmmaMary · Accepted Answer

You should be damn grateful that your boyfriend is skilful enough to undertake actually repairing your car.
Now, do the decent thing and Pay Up for the parts/materials he got for you.
On the other hand if you can't afford to run your car, sell or get rid of it.

sejla · Answer

Pay for the parts unless you share the car.

the_Hofius_ · Answer

It would be different if you were married and shared the bank info. Cause it'd be coming out of the bank from both of y'all. So it really wouldn't matter. However being a son of a mechanic and a noice mechanic myself. Someone has to pay for parts. Parts are cheaper than labor. Labor you have to factor the time and energy spent on it where as the parts are cheaper. Say if was a job to say replace a belt for your fan and maybe a oil change that'd cost maybe about 20-25 dollars depending for the belt plus about 15 bucks for oil (the kind meant for your vehicle type and engine). So far the totally is maybe $35-40 at most. Where as you add the cost of time and labor that's like an 5 hour job minimum and a shop for labor charge $25-30 per hour. So just for labor it'd be $125-150. So in total parts and labor you're looking at a minimum of $160-190. (Tires are even more expensive around $200 per tire depending on size and make). So be glad labor is free. And again someone has to pay for parts. He took money out his pocket probably and bought them he just wants you to repay so he can save it and make it grow even more.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

Um, yeah. He is going out of his way and doing a favor for YOU. Now your going to show how ungrateful and self entitled you are by bitching that he did all the work for you for free and has the audacity to expect you to pay for parts? How self centered can you get?

cavmanier · Answer

Yeah it's totally reasonable for him to do the work and have you pay for the parts. He still did you a big favor. I would have likely bought the parts for my girl, but there's nothing wrong with what he is asking. I would not want to support a gold digger type of girl. I'd want to pay for them just to be nice.

Skelmir_Nathair · Answer

Do you know what labor rates in the shop are? That is most of what you pay for with any repair job. He just saved you a butt load.
Yes you should pay for your parts. Ita your car ans your responsibility.
Try simply being grateful for what he does for you. Instead of demanding more.

etf0nehome · Answer

I'm sure you'll downvote me for this... But isn't it unfair of you to ask him to pay to do work for you? He's saving you a fortune on labor. in my opinion he's already going out of his way to help you and you're being ungrateful. If you were his wife and you two shared the costs of everything then yeah, he should pay for at least some of the parts. If I told my girlfriend that I could fix something so she doesn't have to pay for the service and she said I should buy the parts to fix it too then 100% I would dump her. He's already doing you a favor... why should he also pay out of pocket for something that isn't his fault or responsibility?

spartan55 · Answer

Wow, you have some sense of entitlement on you wtf? What was the repair? Labor rate for a car mechanic is $$$$. Your boyfriend did you a big favor... I really hope you didn't ask him to pay for the parts already?

FakeName123 · Answer

I have nothing to say to this other than I hope your boyfriend breaks up with someone as ungrateful as you are as soon as possible. There is a word for people like you that starts with a T and with a specific word that pepole get when they suffer from dermatitis.

admles · Answer

You can't be serious.

He's already saved you more money than you would have had to spend, and you're expecting him to save you more?

Grow up, pay your bills like an adult, and do something nice for your boyfriend for sacrificing his time like that.

Anonymous · Answer

You shouldn't pay for labour, but you should DEFINITELY pay for the parts. I don't understand why you think you deserve to get off free?

Wow, I just re-read & he's not even charging you for labour. You're just being ridiculous.
It's YOUR car. Pull yourself together girl, you would've been charged both labour AND parts if you got it done professionally.

Hurlyburly · Answer

It is YOUR car. Why do you expect him to pay for the parts? That's ridiculous. Instead you should think of a way how you could return the favor. He invested his time to repair your car after all

LalofromLA · Answer

Well maybe if you don't want to pay for it, ask if you could pay him some other way (and I don't necessarily mean something sexual. Food or something else would also work). He offered to do the labor for free, which is by far the most expensive part of taking a car to the shop to get repaired. Depending on what broke, the parts themselves shouldn't be expensive relative to what you paid for it.

As for the principal of it, I couldn't tell you if he's in the right or wrong simply because I don't know how your relationship is. Personally, if the damage was my gf's fault, I would definitely charge her the parts so she learns from it and doesn't do it again. But if it was like just wear and tear or something out of her control, I wouldn't mind doing everything for free.

Bluebot · Answer

ofc he expects you to pay for the parts, its very generous of him to do it without charging for labour. Any decent human being would greatly appreciate it and gladly pay for parts only.

VaIiant · Answer

You think just because he makes more, you’re entitled to his money? Jesus, woman.
Your boyfriend sounds incredibly sweet. He’s doing this for free. He did not “charge you for it”. He is not going to buy you car parts randomly.

Be grateful, buy the parts and shut the fuck up.

Grobmate · Answer

It's your car not his. Free labor is very kind of him. Yes, you should pay for the required parts. Not him.

Izumiblu · Answer

Lol whut. Seems like you should pay for the parts and then take him out to dinner as thanks

Glue-Sniffer · Answer

I don't understand why you think you shouldn't pay for your own car?

Seket · Answer

Of course it's fair. He is not your husband yet, he can refuse paying for something.

Anonymous · Answer

I think it is completely fair that you pay just because he is your boyfriend and he makes more money then you doesn't mean jackshit you guys aren't married and it is your car so yes it is fair that you do pay him

_dude_ · Answer

Are you saying you expect your boyfriend to pay for your car? You should be ashamed of yourself. Pay him, if you want to own a car, you pay for the spare parts. You should be grateful to him for not charging you for his time and effort.

wankiam · Answer

why should he pay for parts... its your car and he was kind enough to do the labour for free but parts cost money and its your car

DevikaButts95 · Answer

Geez, you're entitled huh?
Your boyfriend already did you a huge favor, and instead of being thankful for it you're demanding more? Like come on, that's the rudest shit I've seen.
I say refuse to pay for it, so he knows to break up with you. You'll save some money doing that, and save him some time he's apparently wasting.

elissa23Trans · Answer

That’s just greedy of you. He gives you a leg and you want two legs and his arm. He is fully in his right to make you pay the parts. It’s already kind enough that he wants to crawl under your car to look what’s wrong. He should have sent you to the garage instead. People like you are never satisfied. Greedy spoiled little “daddy’s princess” . Urgh

jgokgotit · Answer

Do you know how expensive car parts can be? No matter what job he works he probably sacrificed a HUGE portion of his check to make sure you drive safely, which probably cost him something he wanted to do. Also, physically working on cars can be tough, depending on what needed to be fixed. Finally, your car is your responsibility. He might be asking this, not for the money itself, but to see how you might act when y'all are married. I do not blame him for charging you.

Just_someone23 · Answer

You should pay for the parts. Why should he pay for it, its not his car?

Besides you want to save money learn to do it yourself. Then you can really see how expensive auto parts are and how much labor it takes to fix to it.

modeve · Answer

He means business and relations are different grounds.

sjoes006 · Answer

Yes, that’s completely fair on his part.

Probably, if I were him, I’d let you know that I’m shopping salvaged parts and make sure that you can afford the part prior to buying it.

I have friends who are married and keep separate bank accounts and one joint account.

I don’t understand why you would expect him to pay for the parts.

Seriously?

RuthlessReality · Answer

I think it’s reasonable for him to ask you to pay for the parts because he’s going out of his way and “paying” to help you through his time and labor. But if you really feel this is unfair some reason I’d say bring it up to him and have a conversation about it.

dragonmamma · Answer

Being a mechanic is a skill.. He took his TIME out of his day to fix your car. Why do you think its unreasonable to pay him?
Because you have dated for a year?
Because he makes more than you?
You're dating him.. Not married to him.

He still charged you less than what another mechanic would charge.. So he did you a favor.

Pay him for his time.

tcwmass · Answer

he's being nice enough to fix your car, you should pay for the parts. I am amazed you would think like this.

Shadowlegend39 · Answer

Just explain you didn't understand he wanted payment and you don't feel it's appropriate to pay him as he is your boyfriend and offered to help without being clear about payment. Yes, it might create confrontation but clearly there is misunderstanding and you have to discuss it.

CoffeeWC · Answer

Just because he said he could save you money, doesn't mean he meant it would be free. Just because someone makes more money than you, doesn't mean they should pay for everything.
It's your car so you should pay for the parts. Stop acting so selfish and entitled.

Surely · Answer

You should have at least offered to pay for the parts and some other compensation for his labor, such as a nice dinner. Only fair in my book.

Tardcarter · Answer

If you aren't married, it isn't his car. If you break up, he would be down however much the parts cost, for no reason.
If he sourced the parts himself, it might have been cheaper than if you got them from the mechanic.
Seems to me like he did you a solid.

Anonymous · Answer

You should pay. Why the fuck do you expect to get free parts for your car?
He said he would do the work, but you should still buy the needed parts. FFS.

If a friend helps you fix your computer and you need a new motherboard, do you expect them to pay for the motherboard?

JESUS, the entitlement in these post '95ers.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

That is absolutely fair and you are taking complete advantage of him if you do not pay for the parts. He did you a huge favor.

So what if he earns more money than you. By your own words it sounds like he was only saving you money and not covering your entire cost.

winterfox10 · Answer

Why wouldn't that be fair? He's giving you free labor, which is his time and expertise, to fix YOUR car, which he has no ownership of, or any vested interest in keeping in working order.

Besides, you usually get a discount for bringing the old parts back to the store.

loveslongnails · Answer

You should have had that discussion ahead of time, first of all. But even if you did, you should have insisted for either paying for the parts in advance, or if you couldn't afford it all at once, paying it back over time. Unless your boyfriend offered to do it all for free, YOU should at least pay for parts.

BrookieCookie0422 · Answer

Well he should have been clear about it before.

Also, is the overall price better than what you we’re going to pay the other guy?

Is your boyfriend a professional?

If you have to pay for the parts he shouldn’t have charged you for the labor if he’s really trying to help you out.

Also, what boyfriend of a year would charge their girlfriend for that?

Casey10101 · Answer

ehh it is your car, I guess you can ask for an IOU or something, but the cost of the parts are a hell of a lot cheaper than getting a mechanic to.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

My uncle is a mechanic & does all my repairs. He charges me for parts only which I'm more then happy to pay for. He has saved me thousands of dollars on repair & I'm extremely grateful for that. So to answer your question yes you should pay for the parts.

Anonymous · Answer

I've said it once, and I will say it again... women do not love you, they only love what you can provide them with. It's clear that she does not appreciate anything the boyfriend has done for her, expected it to be free because... girlfriend... and it didn't occur to her for a second, the she'd have to pay anything.

Gfs are a myth, and if you think you have one, the jokes on you.

Kiran_Yagami · Answer

Why isn't this fair? He saved you a bunch of money and even installed the parts for you. Asking you to pay the bare minimum, which is for the parts themselves, is more than reasonable. He's got bills too.

Anonymous · Answer

Depends how serious he is with you... I think this is what you want to know.
Also depends how much are the parts.

A guy who counts pennies with you... then you sure need to know if this is for you to settle with.
Some couples are okay splitting everything.
Some traditional couples, the guy will pay for everything (that is he has a decent job as a provider)

Shuri · Answer

It would depend on how serious your relationship is. I don't think I'd expect my boyfriend (if I had one) to buy the parts to my car. He did you a favor with helping you save on labor costs. Why should he have to pay for your parts? It's your car. Now if he was your husband then his view wouldn't make sense. But he's not.

I guess I don't understand why you think he should pay for the parts of a vehicle that isn't his?

Prettygurl12 · Answer

I don't think his request is unreasonable.

This is why you don't offer to do things for family/friends and instead should refer them to someone lol

Why should he be out the cost of parts when it's YOUR car and you've only been together a year?

CreativeMumble · Answer

It's only fair you pay for your own parts for your own car. If he helped build your house, you couldn't expect him to pay for the bricks as well, now could you?

Shutupman · Answer

You should definitely pay for the parts, he shouldn’t even have to ask.  Car parts can be expensive, his money is his own.

PrincessGrail · Answer

You should pay for the parts.

Kat-__o · Answer

No it's not unfair. Pay for your parts woman. You expected him to pay for everything and fix it?

Lliam · Answer

Free labor? You got a good deal. I'd say you need to figure out a way to pay him back, maybe a bit at a time. It's the only fair thing to do. He shouldn't have even had to ask.
Don't be an entitled princess or you'll lose a good boyfriend.

SamuraiTony · Answer

Its your car lol, why you making your mans deal with the financial stuff of your car. Its already enough for him doing the labor, plus he could've refused and you would've spent a lot more money at the mechanics

dog1712 · Answer

You have just found out that life isn't free hahaha

Anonymous · Answer

It is absolutely fair. It costed him money you know. It is not about being able to afford it. It shows how honest you are and fair you are to others. It might not hurt him financially not to get paid but it sure will destroy your relationship.
Don't be a miser. Business is business aand a cup of tea is a cup of tea

laurieluvsit · Answer

I'm sorry but this post is more of a comical variety for me. Some of the guys responses are just hilarious. Don't misunderstand me guys, the funniest comedy is based on truth.

Anonymous · Answer

Lol typical female expecting seething for nothing, seriously it's completely fair that he wants to be reembursed. And it shows a lack of maturity on your part as well as a sense of entitlement that he should pay for that when it's your responsibility. Smh..

BadApple1 · Answer

I would pay for your parts if I was dating you but guys these days aren’t like me. What he did for you was still a nice thing to do. Labor costs are high and he worked for free. May I ask how much the parts were? And what parts are they?

Dog20 · Answer

Lol I charged my dad a flat fee for my writing services. It's no different because he's my dad.
If you can't afford it, just tell him. If he's fixing the car for free, you could at least pay for the car parts girl.

xkildy · Answer

Tell him that you will charge for those legs being in the air 😂😂😂😂 as well..

MissDawn7961 · Answer

pay your boyfriend and shut up lazy but ! Thanks

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