You said that you live in a lovely household. And this image is what I could think of. You're still in the protection of that tree.
Don't stress too much and just focus on doing more. Express yourself more, to begin with. If you like someone, tell them, don't think too far into the future.
The first step is the hardest.
I had to take an exam and move out of the city after I cleared it.
I took the exam and did horrible. I hadn't even thought of what I'd do if I fail it. But there I was, staring at the failure and uncertainity. I was scared because I still had to move out. I mentally prepared myself for a few days, just telling myself that ok , this needs to be done. And the first step was to sell a few things that I didn't need to take. And after that, my mind took control and did all that was needed.
Typing from the new city.
So, the first step is the hardest. Just take it. If you fail, take a small break and take it again.
You have to fight your mind for this first step.
This attitude will have to be developed, but it sure can be developed. With time and patience of course.
Good Luck.
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So good news first, you clearly recognize that you have a problem and that you want to fix it. Good job. So first off I wouldn't even be concerned about dating. If you don't want to date then don't date, not everyone spends they life with another and if doing that isn't appealing to you then don't waste money and time on something you already don't care about. As for everything else you are scared of change. Change Is not inherently good or bad but you being afraid to turn on the AC when your hot is ridiculous. You lack confidence and you lack pride which are also not inherently bad either. You need to commit yourself to something uncomfortable, a dojo, a sport, a demanding hobby, something to get you uncomfortable and help you to experience personal growth. Growing up I was homeschooled and it was really hard for me to understand other people's pain and to register emotion. I was apathic as fuck and I viewed public displays of emotion as weak and pathetic. I realized that was a problem so I decided to ruin my current self and joined the Marine Corps. My she'll was completely destroyed and I basically became an altogether different person. I have a STUPID amount of confidence, I literally swagger when I walk and I have no problem getting laid or doing dangerous or risky activities. You obviously shouldn't do something like that but the point I'm trying to make is that you can change and if you want too you will. Cause where there's a will there's a way.
Your attitude has nothing to do with cowardice but is more of an OCD type of issue.
Perhaps you should seek the help of a specialist that could try to find out the cause of your behavior. Cowardice is defined as
"excessive fear prevents an individual from taking a risk or facing danger".
I don't see any of that if the fact that you don't by new clothes because you prefer your old ones.
You probably have a challenge that you have to overcome. It could also be a sort of procrastination that you push everything for tomorrow and that would include not doing something that requires too much energy.
Not wanting to own things could be a sign of an impending depression caused by your general negative state of mind.
You are not a coward, but... in my opinion, you should talk to a therapist. I can regognize an OCD pattern in what you are describing, but it is not just that. It is more complicated in your case.
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i think it comes down to low self-esteem, your dad did not help it either. try to find a way to like yourself and maybe try therapy it may help. it comes down to how you feel the need to make other people happy as well. your afraid to make them upset at you.
Well you came as coward, and now you are going with OCD as well funny isn't it.
How others decided for you.
You give them something and they will add more to it.
It's what you think you become.
All the bestYou need to drop any excuses you're making and become the person you want to be. It's within your control.
I'm not a psychiatrist but you need to talk to someone who is. You may be suffering from pananoia or possibly PTSD. Have you suffered trauma recently? Or in childhood?
Same. Sometimes i am also afraid to do things that i like
It could be a sense of Security and Safety, rather than Cowardice. You might be on the safe side of things at all times, rather than simply being afraid.
Well the less you do a thing you more you suck at it. We're all cowards by default but the more often we try to overcome that, the less cowardly we become.
Maybe slap yourself in the face and run through traffic or get a punching bag and go wild.
Because you allow yourself to be. Stop, and you won't be.
Say: Bala_O_Bala 😈👿
You have to suck it up man up and take on the world. I’d recommend start off at the gym and go from there
This sounds like a different kind/level of depression
Those are signs of wanting to please even if you have poor relationships, not signs of cowardice.
45+? Aren't you a bit too old to worry about your father's opinions?
You sound like a recluse
Because you’re a liberal
Because you don’t have a gun
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