I did, after being there for a friend who's deadbeat boyfriend skipped town when she decided against an abortion. I was there with her during LeMans classes, massaging and stretching her uterine wall lining, inner and outer labia, and rectal opening (I know, it sounds like I'm a total perve, and I am. But it wasn't like that in this case, and the principles and techniques I used came out of turn of the century gynocology and massage medical text from New York and Paris PHD's of Doctorate Internal and family Medicine, as well as midwife informational text. The kinky side of me came out when we decided to ditch the guilt trip we were laying on ourselves by enjoying it too much, and started dating) too reduce the risk of tearing of the vaginal wall and hopefully make cesarean section completely unnecessary.
It was actually at the most awkward, "and" relevant, time of these therapudic massage exercises, that the subject came up. My arm buried to the elbow inside her uterus, the hand of my other arm massaging her outer extremies while the hand inside her was doing the same inside her, when she became visibly arroused and immediately looked like she'd just been caught with her hand in the cooky jar by a stern disapproving parent, when I asked her if she'd be interested in seeing me in a romantic context sometime, and of not, if I could somehow reasure her that it is absolutely fine by me if she allows herself to derive sexual pleasure from these exercises, because her body is going through changes that make arousal impossible to avoid for pregnant women in her condition and stage of fetal development. I indicated that I thought she was attractive and that an erotic relationship with me wouldn't require her to make commitments of any kind she didn't want in the long term. Such an arrangement would be as long, or short, as we were both comfortable with, and when I withdrew my arm from inside her and asked her consent to show her our feelings were mutual in this regard, she said absolutely, seeing the tent in my briefs. I removed them and told her that my aroused state is even more obvious than hers, and that the decision to date me was hers too make, and I would be on board. The decision not to date, same answer. The decision to put my briefs back on was also her's too make, either way. She didn't need an excuse to enjoy herself if she chose to keep me bare a while, and didn't need to feel guilty or embarrassed if she remained in that nude state herself, because she wouldn't be the only one enjoying the experience if she did.
We dated, fooled around when she felt up to it. I tried to be there for her when she wasn't feeling so great and needed someone to help with acid, pains, and other womanly issues of late term pregnancy I won't get into.
Getting rid of the pretence of formality made the pregnancy easier on her and less taxing on my guilty conscience, by us agreeing not to keep things from each other, and that it was appropriate to share a deep intimacy without attaching unsavory, old fashioned attitudes of obligation and marriage, that destroyed my mother's generation of unwed mothers.
The well being of this single mother and her child was priority, but wouldn't be something I would allow anyone to lay any kind of guilt trip or social stigma on iether of us. Not her, her newborn baby girl, or me. Some religious types tried, trying to impose thier religious dogma on her alledged lack of morality. I have never physically, or verbally, abused a lady in all my life, but they found that coming to her home trying to pass judgment on her wicked ways, was punishable by the full weight of my judgement and stern disapproval of thier underhanded, immoral ways, came without restraint, and I could lecture them into submission as expertly as any reverend or hanging judge ever could.
No, I wouldn't date a woman who is having a baby with her ex. I wouldn't even date her if she wasn't but just broke up with her ex recently because she could go back to him. Someone who was just in a long, bad relationship is the type who will project all of their exe's BS onto you at some point. They haven't mentally processed what happened OR grown into being a better girlfriend because it takes time for people to figure out how they contributed to a bad situation.
She has a history of picking the wrong guys too. The fact she picked you a week after her ex dumped her (most likely) isn't something to celebrate. You might need to improve yourself so you can get higher quality women.
In almost all cases. a guy who gets with a woman having another man's baby is being weak, desperate, lacks confidence. It wasn't as bad in the old days because it was more likely the guy could find a loyal woman. The odds of you finding that in this woman are low cause that's how it works these days: most are always looking to upgrade/cheat. So it's 1,000 times more foolish to go down the road you're going now than it used to be.
No, but only because I'm childfree - so obviously I don't want a pregnant partner, I don't want a child and I'm not about to force someone who wants a kid to give it up just for me (that's fucking cruel).
If I wanted a kid, I'd have no problem with it provided we're a good fit and we've talked all of it out.
Establishing clear expectations and ground rules will be important. I'd want to know what sort of supports I'm expected to provide, what my wife would want (not just need) of me and our life, and how will the other parent factor into the picture.
I wouldn't blame you for not being into it. It would be hard. But I'd end things sooner than later if you're not into it. I'm sure she'll understand. It's not like she can blame you. You haven't been dating for very long. Coming out of toxic relationships are hard enough as it is without trying to date someone under this type of circumstance.
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I'm already pregnant so thatd be a little weird to date someone whose also pregnant
Considering that I'm an anti-natalist... 👄 no
Nope i wouldn't do it. Really? That someones kid i mean really?
There is more females out there. You sound insecure grab the easiest way when her feelings are hurt by her ex. What you thought was selfish. You didn't allowed her to process what she going through instead you become her tear blanket while accomplishing your desires with her. Now if she changes her mind and backed up she will feel more worst. She will feel abused.
I had a friend a super close friend, trust me we have spoken sex subjects. We didn't have sex at all. In school every teacher thought we were going to get married after highschool. She literally told me she was on a date. I took it as normal, her boyfriend show up at our high school to meet me and we got along. Then she got pregnant while in school. They had their off and on argues but never was about our friendship. Once i graduated and i went to college. Then they moved to another city because job. We had couple calls and faded. I decided not to answer her calls anymore because I wanted for her to focus and ask her man on anything. Not depend on someone. It took her about 13 years to call me just know how we were doing. She happily married and I am happily single with a business.
Basically, just because they an argument and split you to advantage of her when her logic and feelings were low. You didn't allow her process her situation.
Obviously this question isn't for me (a hetero woman), but that's never stopped me before lol
If you don't want to, don't. If you can accept the child you can't accept her. Also there may be other reasons for you not to date her. You both need to heal after the toxic relationships. She needs to focus on having a happy healthy pregnancy. I think with you it will be another toxic relationship. You obviously don't care enough about her if her being pregnant by someone else bothers you so much. And you don't have to care about her enough. It's a new relationship that may not be the best timing anyway.
Well, I'm a girl.. so I wouldn't wanna date another female in general Lol.
However, it is still early on, it is good to have honest and open discussions on your views and feelings. If you're not with it, then its better to let her go and have her find her happiness elsewhere.
If I was dating a guy who is someone's baby daddy, I think it will be hard. But if I really like him, thinks he's the right guy, treats me well, and has boundaries with the old partner.. I would still continue and love his child like my own.
My Chinese ex may not still be pregnant; but I would only take her back if:
1) She invested more time in me.
2) She could find a way stateside.
3) The man that knocked her up is truly gone.
Until all these conditions are met, it would be a fool's errand to even attempt to take her back. Better to let her raise her daughter in peace. She wasn't given much choice by her land, culture, family, and government; but made one of the few decisions they allowed her to have on the table. And I was not an option in any of them. She let them make up her mind for her.
That was always her weakness: seldom ever willing to stand up for herself. And weirdly enough, in the end, I paid the price. But such is life.
I’m not into girls lol. But if I were a man, or into girls, I wouldn’t date her as long as I feel like she’s really really special, or if I’m so deeply in love with her. Babies are a lot of work. If you truly love her and don’t want to let her go, you need to accept the baby too
No way in hell. Either you have another man involved in her life that she can play off against you anytime she wants to because he's the biological father or you're raising someone else's kid. And think about how embarrassing it will be if you accompany her to prenatal classes.
No way in hell. Keep her as a friends with benefits, but look for a real woman.
Whenever you have doubt just realize there is a 99% chance she intended to get pregnant by her ex. Chad Thundercock dumped her anyway.
Don't get caught in the middle of this train wreck.
"I like you as a provider, I just don't want you to reproduce"
"If only women could choose the father of their children... "
"Now that I've had my fun with some other guy, you can take responsibility"
"Sorry you became attached to my child, to bad you have no rights to him, I found a better simp to pay the bills, so I'm dumping you and you'll never see him again"
I personally would date a pregnant woman, considering I can't impregnante women myself.
However, you don't have to accept a relationship with someone who has a baby. If you're with her, you should also accept the baby. That said, if she chooses abortion (not by force), then maybe you'd reconsider being with her?
Even if I was into dating, I would draw the line at pregnant. Too many instances when the shit flies between the new guy and baby Daddy, because baby Daddy has it in his head the new guy will try and steal the child from him and take over being "Daddy". Uh uh!! I'd rather suck on a Brillo pad 🤢
No because men are biologically wired to feel contempt for a woman that already gave up her womb. They call us insecure to feel better for the mistake they clearly made. Every time she sees the child it will remind her of her ex
Sources: life experience
I doubt anyone would blame you if you walked. Even her. She has no right this is more than an innocent child this is a lot of problems and a different life. The child will need clothes, food, entertainment, schooling, raising it's a full time commitment for the rest of your life.
If she just found out it's not too late for an abortion, depending on how things are with her ex. I don't know if you people are pro life or pro choice but the option is there
No, I would not. If she wanted me, she should have chosen me and not him and that should have been my child she carried in her womb and not his. Let her work out her stuff with the guy who made her pregnant in the first place or else forget about dating altogether and concern herself with raising her child.
Would you date a woman who already had a child? If so, what’s the difference? Everyone has a past and you kind of have to accept that past if you like them and want to be with them. That being said, if you’re not ready to take on the responsibility of a baby, it would be best to move on now.
Nope, Never. If you choose to do it you must accept the consequences that may come along with this. Liabilities will most likely heavily out weigh the assets if there are any.
I sure as hell wouldn't.
Sounds like a lot of pressure for someone to just nonchalantly want to force parenthood on you like that as if being a second choice rebound isn't already enough pressure and baggage:/
now this chick wants you to finish raising her poor judgement's seed
I get it tho a baby is a baby it didn't ask to be born still
Don't let your feelings getting in the way of reality and do something drastic that you're gonna regret and not be able to handle..
When I was 22 and in the Air Force, I had an affair with 30 year old pregnant woman. She found out her husband was cheating on her and somehow started clinging to me as a friend and then lover. We had a lot of plans about her divorcing him and us getting married but he ended up going PCS and she didn't want to break up the family after all. She had 3 other kids by him. A pregnant woman is an awesome lover and the best part, you don't have to worry about her getting pregnant.
Most men I know do not want to raise another man’s kid. You should probably run. You’ll find a childless woman who can carry YOUR own kid for you. Why should you stick with a woman who’s carrying “next man’s baby?” Think about it.
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