Why do girls usually fall in love quicker than guys?

[Nazgol]

I know guys usually like to take their time & are more level-headed and logical when it comes to love & emotions. I always thought how it's so interesting we can't be the same , & how we feel and think differently from our opposite gender. Wouldn't it be great if we were both always on the same page? And I'm by no means generalizing, I know some girls can slow down their feelings & think like a male but majority can't

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+1 y

A girl is usually more likely to have obsessions

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+1 y

Good answers. One thing to point out, I think it's also got to do with culture differences. Like I know in certain cultures/counties this is how the guys are

[MrOracle]

This is a misinterpretation in my opinion.

You first have to recognize that most women only have one kind of "feelings" for guys - romantic love, which typically includes sexual attraction and desire, but it's virtually always romantic. This causes women to project this onto men, but men don't work that way.

Most men have the ability to separate sex from love, and so we can (and often do) have sexual desires for women we have no romantic desires with. In fact, men have sexual-only attraction for probably 20 or 30 times as many women as we have romantic attraction to (not that most men have much come of those desires, but we have them). Because of this, it often SEEMS that men either don't have romantic feelings at all, or that they're "slow" to get them, but in my experience, this isn't what's usually happening. For myself, and for most guys I've observed or been friends with, when they have romantic feelings for a woman, it hits them hard and fast right from the beginning - there's rarely any question that he's got "those" types of feelings for her. It's very much the exception that guys "grow" feelings over time - it does happen occasionally, but it's far from the norm. We usually know right away.

That doesn't always mean we SHOW it right away, though. Many guys are afraid to let these feelings show too overtly, and many other guys just don't know how to do so, but are smart enough to know that they don't want to be clumsy and obvious, so they hold back and try to take more time with it, and be more manly about it.

[Lionman95]

I´m not really sure if guys really can slow their feelings down. I´d rather think that we´re often times not sure if we are in love with a woman. But that doesn´t mean that we can ignore those feelings completely. It´s just from my point of view that we need longer to decide.
Feelings are a case where many of us aren´t logical, we just take longer to say we´re in love because our standards and expectations are more open than females. Guys often look for women, they are attracted to with a nice and caring character, that´s has a good working life and the ability to cook. That expectation can include a lot of women, so it takes time to find the one for a guy he loves.
Female expectations and standards are often times more narrow than guys so they know quicker if they like a guy or not.
So I don´t know if I really wish guys and women to be on the same page in this case.

[Medicalbug]

I can only speculate for other people, but my situation is pretty weird. My feeling of romantic “love” is actually highly superficial and I have issues with wanting relationships because I have difficulties loving someone for who they really are. Most of the time, even if I am “in love” first, I am also out of it just as the guy gets into it. Either that or I date even more flaky guys who claim equally silly love. I don’t even say it most of the time, even though I think feel it?
Anyway, I’ve been accused on multiple occasions of “having lost interest with no reason” with the guy citing that I acted like I loved him but then I moved on not long after that. I keep pointing out that they did not reciprocate at the time and I thought they weren’t interested, but I can’t help but wonder if I ever even knew them enough to love them. I suspect they were just an ideal that I appreciated for the moment.
I am in love with concepts, ideas and beautiful things - but it’s flighty and while the bigger picture represents someone who just loves life, my investment in new things on a long term basis is not deep. There is just too much stimulus and there are too many people. Mostly I just learn to really love family and friends on a solid level.
As a result I have decided to stick to casual stuff for now.

[Shy80sgirl]

My husband and I feel pretty hard for each other, although I knew he was the one a little quicker than he knew. He was surprised of this, because I think he’s actually a little more emotional than me. Another factor that plays into it maybe previous relationships that were good or bad or challenging to recover from during a break up. I’ve always felt like being in a good place in my own personal life made it easier to find a serious/happy relationship.

[Sonorous]

I think both fall in lust at around a similar rate. It's the falling out it that often varies.

[ChiTown33]

I'm not sure about speed. Anyone is faster than me. I'm glacial speed when it comes to feelings. But trust is a big thing to me and while I like people very easily I trust people very slowly.
Women I think are at the mercy of their emotions. They have to learn to control them and some times that can take a few years. So they become infatuated like that ::::: snaps fingers:::;, with a guy they like. I couldn't tell you when they start to love a guy. I can never tell when they do. Or when they're just acting like they do.

[Naimgood]

Women that choose a sexual partner are traditionally more inclined to make it serious because women get pregnant so they choose a partner more carefully. Men have a drive to continue their lineage. So men naturally have more of a drive to sleep with more people. But a lot has changed since the invention of birth control. This pill changed our entire species and we're still observing the evolution of these changes. For proof you can look up the changes in divorce rates and the change in American cultures ideas on promiscuity. I've personally met women, some who were prostitutes, who say it's empowering to be promiscuous. But depression and anxiety due to relationship issues has never been higher in its recorded history. Sad but true

[Backstage_]

From the point of my view nope it's not. Girls really scan guys comprehensively much more than guys might think and they usually try to be more selective in the flirting phase. They would like to know all of the qualifications and properties of guys while they've been deciding whether the guy is correct or not. Moreover, guys can really be impressed of the outer (just physical) appearance of girls in pretty quick time even since they are wearing too provocative. It's not about the gender or something else, thanks to the just great coincidence and mutual infatuation amongst the couple. Girls could express their feelings much more clearly and obviously than guys which is another advantageous thing for them..

[my500thaccongag]

I think its because we think too much about it, anything given that amount of time to think about would become a sensitive subject. Men, in the other hand, dont think much about things, they just take action. This is why women have higher rate of suicide attempts than men, but its men who has the highest rank of deaths due to suicide.

[Berethor]

Men tend to be better at being stoic, and falling in love quickly have a lot of downsides.

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheStoic

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SillyRabbitRomanceIsForKids

[LindsayLesling]

because as animals women needed a provider for their children and men wanted to go hunt for food and mate with other women. So it makes sense that there is this difference between men and women where men usually want to hook up with a bunch of girls and women fall in love with their f*ckbuddies

[shaysh87]

umm... I honestly do not think that girls fall in love more quickly than guys. Guys tend to lose their minds more and do crazier things when they are in love. From my experience, guys are not logical when they become sexually / romantically attracted to someone. Their logic goes out the window.

[Yurrasis]

It varies among the type of person. Some are desperate for companionship (daydream about it 24/7), some fall in love slowly because they want time to sort their feelings, some are gullible and easily fall for the surface of affection, etc.

I never really thought that men or women fall in love faster than the other. Always believed that it depended on the person.

[D_Bone_Steak]

Oxytocin and Vasopressin are the "love" hormones. Oxytocin hits females harder, so they get hit with the butterflies... so like a love drug that will make them jump in hard and fast, but lose interest quicker. As you can guess it's for the most part, the opposite for the male counterpart. Like testosterone and estrogen, both have the same hormones, but the amount of it is very different between the sexes.

[D_Bone_Steak]

I see a lot of comments saying it's the opposite and I think it's important not to conflate sexual desire for love. Kinda why I mentioned estrogen and testosterone.

[D_Bone_Steak]

I think it would be best to exchange the word 'love' for 'commitment' so that the average normie would understand.

[ObscuredBeyond]

If a woman impresses me enough, she can turn my golf cart into a rocket. Women may be more prone in general to obsessions; but men can get OCD too. And let me tell you: it can cloud your judgment quickly, and make you willing to rush into things. You just have to get lucky and figure out the right button to push.

[ManOnFire]

I don't think women fall in love faster. I think they may become infatuated faster. Or stronger? Not sure, but it would explain why they tend to become "bored" with a guy and ready to be over him just as quickly. Usually strong feelings of interest in a person that start fast, eventually burn out just as fast.

[Anonymous]

I don't think its anything like that.. it's probably just different from person to person rather than a gender-related thing. I could definitely think of my friends crushing on guys before the guys liked them, but also of guys liking girls for a long time. If specifically love is what you're talking about, though, I haven't been in any long term relationship ever so couldn't speak on that.

[RationalMale]

Biology. Girls need a mate who will protect them and their kids, so the ones that bonded less died out more and the ones who bonded more became the norm through breeding. And let's be real sex is a lot more dramatic for girls as they physically get penetrated and... well, filled up.

[JordanRattyRat]

Like bottoms and gacha UwU cats

[Malgaran]

While I think it generally just depends on the person really and not the gender, I would say from experience I always loved whoever I'm with so much more than they loved me. I can be slow, but that's because I love too deep.

[AncientWisdom]

I think sometimes it may be so every interaction is different and males have their own quirks. We evolved differently to obtain a balance between the genders which when done correctly can create a pair bond that works together for genetic survival.

[weysally]

not love, but girls tend to search through their later school days and or college days looking for the boy they want to marry, then spend the rest of their life trying to figure out why, boys look more to who they can fuck

[MelaninQueen21]

Actually... it's the other way around and it's been proven! Guys fall much quicker than girls, not to say that there aren't some girls who fall in love quickly.

[Anonymous]

It's not true. Guys usually fall hard and fast for a girl. Men usually can get feelings really quick and when he's got them, go all in. Also, men take break ups much harder than women and are more emotionally invested.

[Dragonpurple]

I often feel like I fall too fast, fall flat on my face and get hurt. It is like jumping off a cliff for me, and if it doesn't work out I go splat.

It is probably just me though.