How to tell my boyfriend I've been accepted to a uni in Australia?

[Anonymous]

I just found out I got accepted to a dream school and program in Australia. The problem is, I've been living with my boyfriend for almost two years now and we've kind of built a life together. He's expressed how he doesn't want me to leave him when I've said my dream is to study abroad, so this makes it harder.

We can move there together, but the problem is we've had our issues and I've actually considered ending it several times. We have different love languages and he is a bit immature for his age. But I know he loves me. No one has ever fought to keep me in their life the way he has, but Im struggling with my own feelings for him.

I just don't know how to break it to him. Should I invite him to come with me so we can work on the relationship, or should I start completely fresh and just leave?

I have to admit I struggle with self esteem so it's hard to imagine finding anyone else who will love me as he does. I'm 21, he is 26. So I know Im still very young but love is still hard to find these days.

Any life advice would be great

[Jabberjaw]

You made the decision to leave when you applied to the school in Australia, you're just seeking comfort for your decision at this point. Because you know you won't be happy if you stay and you know he's not going to go if you try to have him come.

And even if he does it would likely cause problems in Australia because your decision uprooted both of your lives when he never wanted to be in Australia.

You have a moment to put on big girl pants and make a hard decision no matter what at this point. And I think we know you're choosing Australia no matter what.

It's just a question of if you're going to end it or try and have him come too. Personally, I just think you're over the relationship. Because the tone in this story is "should I stay or should I leave?"

Not a tone of "I want to be with him, how do I get him to come with me?". You either you're kind of done in the relationship already, or at best you want him, but you don't want him more than Australia

[andreasderjuengere]

I'd expect that as a foreigner, he will need a visa (unless you're from New Zealand).
I see a few other practical issues coming up if he intends to join you there; such as: what is HE going to do over there?
''My life advice'': nothing in life is granted 'for free'. When you WANT something, there's also something to give in return; always.
This could be the ending of your present relationship. You knew that when you applied there.
How to tell him... don't wait. If you indeed intend to go there as a couple, then prepare it well enough.

[EmmaMary]

I'm sure I've read this very same story, not so long ago. 🤔

[Keloreon77]

I'd tell him how you feel and make the best decision based on the outcome of the conversation. You either be selfish and consider ONLY yourself and what it is that you want. (In my opinion that's not wife material and you should probably just date and not consider exclusive relationships) Or value that this man care so greatly for you that he'd follow you to another country JUST to be with you. I don't know seems like you don't want someone who genuinely cares for you. You believe that you can do better and may be the biggest mistake of your life. Love languages aren't to be matched their to be understood. IF this person means anything too you. You'd learn to love his imperfections perfectly.

[exitseven]

I sounds you are both at different places in your respective lives. I think that if you do not pursue this opportunity you will regret it and maybe hold it against your boyfriend. I do not know what his situation is but maybe he still could come with you.

[kinggeorge007]

If I were in your situation and I had thoughts on ending things with him. I would take this opportunity to end it. Because of you've found love at your age, it isn't hard to find it again before you know it. So take the opportunity and go, start a fresh life.

[ArtemisSilver]

Just tell him.

When my girlfriend, went to art school I went with, moved in with her and became the head of campus security.

Sounds a bit controlling but it really wasn't like that. I was going to look for a cooking job, but walked up to the campus guard and jokingly asked how to get his job. Turns out he was leaving shortly anyways, and having a replacement ready to go made him look good.

[ArtemisSilver]

Now we're married, so it was worth the trouble 😂

[Adam1978]

You should already had this talk before applying. You are not a couple if you don't make life decisions like this as a couple.

[driven159]

you are the one that controls your future you need to make sure you have a good future if he doesn't wait for you then the relationship was not strong enough then

[Stazz76]

Which city is this school in?

[Anonymous]

Ask him to hop in your ass like a kangaroo