My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now but before we started as friends with benefits 2 years before starting relationship.
Through out our relationship I always felt I was the one who was putting more effort to the relationship and we've been sexless for 6 weeks now and it's been affecting my self esteem a lot.
He doesn't know but I've caught other girls birthdays (which I assume met online) saved on his ipad calendar multiple times but I didn't say anything because I saw this when we weren't a couple yet.
Once I've caught him talking to other girl but he refused to show me and just claimed it was his friend from when he did exchanged student.
Finally yesterday, he had his phone and while he was moving I could see there was a picture of a girl so I asked him if I could see it and he refused to show me. I was getting really upset and when he finally showed me, it was a notification email from a dating website that someone had viewed his profile.
He said it was from old time and he doesn't use that website anymore but was still getting the emails and said he will delete his profile. I asked him if he could show me when he's deleting it but then he accused me of not trusting him and blamed me for looking at his phone. He said he doesn't need to show me deleting it and I just need to trust him. I asked him if he would rather show me delete it and continue relationship, or don't show me and end the relationship and he couldn't answer.
I left early to go home because I was mad and when he came back home (we live together) he said he had already deleted the profile so he can't show me deleting it anymore.
We ended up decided to give another try but to be honest I don't trust him anymore and I know I should end this relationship because it has a very bad influence on me but I love him and I can't picture my life without him. What can I do to drift my emotion away from him?
Through out our relationship I always felt I was the one who was putting more effort to the relationship and we've been sexless for 6 weeks now and it's been affecting my self esteem a lot.
He doesn't know but I've caught other girls birthdays (which I assume met online) saved on his ipad calendar multiple times but I didn't say anything because I saw this when we weren't a couple yet.
Once I've caught him talking to other girl but he refused to show me and just claimed it was his friend from when he did exchanged student.
Finally yesterday, he had his phone and while he was moving I could see there was a picture of a girl so I asked him if I could see it and he refused to show me. I was getting really upset and when he finally showed me, it was a notification email from a dating website that someone had viewed his profile.
He said it was from old time and he doesn't use that website anymore but was still getting the emails and said he will delete his profile. I asked him if he could show me when he's deleting it but then he accused me of not trusting him and blamed me for looking at his phone. He said he doesn't need to show me deleting it and I just need to trust him. I asked him if he would rather show me delete it and continue relationship, or don't show me and end the relationship and he couldn't answer.
I left early to go home because I was mad and when he came back home (we live together) he said he had already deleted the profile so he can't show me deleting it anymore.
We ended up decided to give another try but to be honest I don't trust him anymore and I know I should end this relationship because it has a very bad influence on me but I love him and I can't picture my life without him. What can I do to drift my emotion away from him?
