How often do you realize what you lost when it's too late?

[IsaacT95]

I was just reading about a guy that used to made a mockery out of commitment, marriage and joked about everything, including diseases. The guy's girlfriend had enough and dumped him.

That guy reminded me of my old self. When it was for real and I really wanted to commit (meant it all from the heart), she didn't believe me at all. It was too late by then. She was deeply affected by my previous mockery and lack of concern for her feelings and serious topics. She didn't trust me anymore. She had already thrown the towel by then. I lost her for good. This was a case of crying wolf too much that by the time it's real, you're not believed.

I learned the hard way. How often does this happens?

[PrettyPriya]

I cannot say this has happened to my recollection. I tend to seize any opportunity I can. I did so with my now fiancé. It kind of relates to what you are saying in a way. You see, I was the one to ask him out on a date.

The reason was I met him while I was working and knew that if I didn't ask, I might never see him again. So, I took the chance and asked. I am glad I did because he ended up being "the one".

So, while I didn't have to realize what I lost, I have always thought about what would have happened if I didn't ask him for lunch. I likely would have never seen him again in my life.

He didn't want to bother me while I was working. He told me this after we started dating. He was afraid to ask me because he thought it was inappropriate since I was at my job and in the middle of the workday.

So, as I mention, I often think about how I would have missed out on an opportunity and life with such a wonderful man. I'm glad that didn't happen.

[IsaacT95]

I'm glad you took the chance to ask him out. I'm happy for your engagement. I would've probably been engaged if I had never behaved like that guy in the story. Like him, I also made jokes about everything in the past. When I say everything, I mean everything; include a fake proposal once. By the time I've realized the damage done and wanted to propose for real, it was too late. She couldn't see me as a serious, marriage-minded man. She didn't want it anymore and had thrown the towel.

I've have changed ever since and abandoned the jokes for good... at the cost of losing her for good.

[PrettyPriya]

@IsaacT95 Thanks for the kind words. You know... we live and learn from experiences like that. Sometimes they are tough lessons but you did the right thing by realizing it and bettering yourself.

Some people wouldn't be as mature to realize what they had and how to not let that happen again. The fact that you made yourself better (although it doesn't make the heartbreak easier) is the right thing to do.

[IsaacT95]

Yes some life lesson are learned the hard way when it's too late and nothing can be done to repair the damage. If I had to do it all over again and went back in time, I would've been the serious man she wanted, not ever joke about serious matters and made her my wife. I would've been a father by now. Oh well.
I'm currently dating again and plan on being better to the next girl.

[PrettyPriya]

@IsaacT95 That is the right attitude and good on you. I have learned the hard way as well sometimes. I think we all do at one point or another in life. It sucks but at least you have the right attitude.

I've seen far too many guys and girls not realize and learn from their mistakes, only to repeat them again. That is a sign of immaturity. Best of luck to you and happy to hear you are back out there dating.

[Anonymous]

I give all that I have to people and relationships. If they don’t appreciate it it is their fault because after bad behaviour I just stop or become slowly removing myself from anyone that doesn’t give me the same.

[Guy13]

Once in relationships is all it took. I learn quickly 🤷🏻‍♂️

[IsaacT95]

Not being taken serious when I really meant it and then losing her cause me to mature faster. If I had the power to turn back time, I would've never made behaved that way and be the man she would want.

[Guy13]

Ephesians 5 are directions for man/woman. Couples/Marriage counseling is based upon Ephesians 5. Give it a read…

[Avicenna]

It happens sometimes. You learn from it and move on.

[IsaacT95]

yes I learned the hard way

[Wise4myage]

Thankfully not very often.

[IsaacT95]

Good. I've been advising my younger brother not to make the same mistake I did, not to joke about serious matters and be consider of a girl's feelings. It was too late for me by the time I wanted to really commit and was ready. She didn't believe me at all and wasn't looking forward to it anymore. She had already thrown the towel way back already.