Moving in with boyfriend but I’m not used to a relationship and I struggle?

[Anonymous]

I’m 22 and I’ve never had a relationship. Well I’m kind of in one right now which Is my first real getting serious kinda thing. In the past I’ve just had flings, friends with benefits and never been taken very seriously or it would be just sleeping a night at a hotel etc. nothing ever serious.

My life’s done a complete 180 where I’m with sometime and we’re having a child and live together basixally. I just DONT KNOW how I get rid of the anxiety of waking up in the morning wanting to look perfect and have neat hair, making sure my teeth are brushed or I have a mint in my mouth before he wakes up. Making sure I look perfect Everytime, even not wanting him to see me without makeup. I don’t know if this is normal or a anxiety issue, just constantly having the pressure to look perfect even in the morning and no messy hair.

Or even things such as like having sex, im so used to someone just using me for sex and only coming for sex to the point, I actually get offended when the guy im with can just chill with me and not sleep with me? Obviously we do sleep together but I find it weird he’s not just using me for that and we don’t have sex every single time we see each other. My friends in relationships say that’s normal and there partner is like that but it feels so weird for me? Like im used to going to bed and then just having sex with me then leaving.

Im not complaining here at all it’s just how do I get used to this all. Is my behaviour normal? Or even like when we make plans on a certain day to do certain things and cook together it’s so bazzare to me it almost feels not natural? Is this normal behaviour in just not used to this?

[Anonymous]

Are you still struggling? ﾠ

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you're adjusting to your first serious relationship, which can be a big transition. Here are some things I'd recommend:

1. Try to be gentle with yourself. This is new territory for you, so it's normal to feel anxious or unsure at first. Give yourself time to adjust.

2. Remember that your partner likes you for who you are, not how "perfect" you look. Your authentic self is enough.

3. Focus on building trust and intimacy, not just sex. Getting to know each other on a deeper level will help you feel more comfortable in the relationship.

4. Communicate openly with your partner about how you're feeling. They can support and reassure you as you adjust.

5. Try new experiences together slowly. Start with small acts of intimacy like cooking together, then build from there as you feel more comfortable.

6. Remind yourself that your partner's intentions are good. They likely want an emotionally connected, caring relationship with you.

7. Consider talking to a therapist if the anxiety becomes overwhelming. They can help you work through any unresolved issues that may be contributing.

8. With time and patience, the newness will wear off and things will start feeling more "natural." But keep communicating to build that intimacy.

In summary, your feelings and behaviors are normal given your past experiences. The key is communication, trust and being gentle with yourself as you explore this new kind of relationship. I hope this helps give you some perspective and strategies! Let me know if you have any other questions.

sounds like you're adjusting to your first serious relationship, which can be a big transition. Here are some things I'd recommend:

1. Try to be gentle with yourself. This is new territory for you, so it's normal to feel anxious or unsure at first. Give yourself time to adjust.

2. Remember that your partner likes you for who you are, not how "perfect" you look. Your authentic self is enough.

3. Focus on building trust and intimacy, not just sex. Getting to know each other on a deeper level will help you feel more comfortable in the relationship.

4. Communicate openly with your partner about how you're feeling. They can support and reassure you as you adjust.

5. Try new experiences together slowly. Start with small acts of intimacy like cooking together, then build from there as you feel more comfortable.

6. Remind yourself that your partner's intentions are good. They likely want an emotionally connected, caring relationship with you.

7. Consider talking to a therapist if the anxiety becomes overwhelming. They can help you work through any unresolved issues that may be contributing.

8. With time and patience, the newness will wear off and things will start feeling more "natural." But keep communicating to build that intimacy.

In summary, your feelings and behaviors are normal given your past experiences. The key is communication, trust and being gentle with yourself as you explore this new kind of relationship. I hope this helps give you some perspective and strategies! Let me know if you have any other questions.

It sounds like you're adjusting to your first serious relationship, which can be a big transition. Here are some things I'd recommend:

1. Try to be gentle with yourself. This is new territory for you, so it's normal to feel anxious or unsure at first. Give yourself time to adjust.

2. Remember that your partner likes you for who you are, not how "perfect" you look. Your authentic self is enough.

3. Focus on building trust and intimacy, not just sex. Getting to know each other on a deeper level will help you feel more comfortable in the relationship.

4. Communicate openly with your partner about how you're feeling. They can support and reassure you as you adjust.

5. Try new experiences together slowly. Start with small acts of intimacy like cooking together, then build from there as you feel more comfortable.

6. Remind yourself that your partner's intentions are good. They likely want an emotionally connected, caring relationship with you.

7. Consider talking to a therapist if the anxiety becomes overwhelming. They can help you work through any unresolved issues that may be contributing.

8. With time and patience, the newness will wear off and things will start feeling more "natural." But keep communicating to build that intimacy.

In summary, your feelings and behaviors are normal given your past experiences. The key is communication, trust and being gentle with yourself as you explore this new kind of relationship. I hope this helps give you some perspective and strategies! Let me know if you have any other questions.

[Oliverlogan263]

It sounds like you're adjusting to your first serious relationship, which can be a big transition. Here are some things I'd recommend:

1. Try to be gentle with yourself. This is new territory for you, so it's normal to feel anxious or unsure at first. Give yourself time to adjust.

2. Remember that your partner likes you for who you are, not how "perfect" you look. Your authentic self is enough.

3. Focus on building trust and intimacy, not just sex. Getting to know each other on a deeper level will help you feel more comfortable in the relationship.

4. Communicate openly with your partner about how you're feeling. They can support and reassure you as you adjust.

5. Try new experiences together slowly. Start with small acts of intimacy like cooking together, then build from there as you feel more comfortable.

6. Remind yourself that your partner's intentions are good. They likely want an emotionally connected, caring relationship with you.

7. Consider talking to a therapist if the anxiety becomes overwhelming. They can help you work through any unresolved issues that may be contributing.

8. With time and patience, the newness will wear off and things will start feeling more "natural." But keep communicating to build that intimacy.

In summary, your feelings and behaviors are normal given your past experiences. The key is communication, trust and being gentle with yourself as you explore this new kind of relationship. I hope this helps give you some perspective and strategies! Let me know if you have any other questions.

[BigDog1989]

Moving in without marriage? THIS isn't THE NINETIES, ANYMORE

[Asker]

I probably won’t ever get married

[BigDog1989]

Then why move in?

[Anonymous]

I assume he was the one that asked you out