So I dated this narcissist and found myself invested in learning about this disorder. I was talking about my breakup online and someone pointed out that I might be a narcissist too and that I might be victimizing him. While I still think he's a covert narcisst, this possibility is kind of exciting to me.
I find myself very arrogant and I always think about my image and how people see me on the outside like there's always this thought in my head that says "how do people see me now? Do they think I look cool? Do I look likeable? Do I look presentable?" I also find myself lying to people to look more relatable and I do it a lot and I don't know if it's normal.
But I know how to be empathetic. Then again, maybe I'm being empathetic to use people in my favor. Because I don't feel sad when I hear about disasters and people or animal dying. I hate being wrong as well and I find myself arguing with people or in some cases I just ignore their opinions. Also apologizing makes me feel uncomfortable and weak. I like being talked about or being the center of attention too. And I hold grudges.
Maybe I'm just a self centered person and I've lost my identity because of this relationship.
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So I have often considered this thought myself. In the end there is a healthy level of confidence and even arrogant. But once you start crossing over those lines, then yes you might be a narcissist.
Here is the witness test, have or can you admit to being wrong, like about anything. Can you accept that way you feel, may be right to you, but not other people? Do you honestly believe your better than average person. I mean I think I am better than some people, I just mean do you really think you are so much better than other people that they should cater to you.
I struggle to admit that I'm wrong. I don't like it. People say I always want to be right. I believe I am not average
Most people of value, believe they have a lot to offer and are better than average. But what does that really mean to people that don't really know you? To them you are just an average person, until you prove to them that you are more than just that.
I have my opinions on lots of things, and yes, I put value on my opinions... but does not mean I am right about everything. So, if you cannot step back and be truly objective about yourself or embrace other people opinions and accept that you can't always be right about all things... then yes you might be a narcissist.
So I am an extremely confident person. I place a high value on myself. But I also know that my beliefs in myself might have no value to another person. I accept that people can disagree with me and still have value. I do not have to be right; I just want to be acknowledged. When woman can not acknowledge my feelings or the things, I place value on, or would want in partner... even in the most basic and simplest of ways. I assume she is not a person who values me... because she is only interested in promoting herself. And if she is not a narcissist, then she is a person that does not value me for what I bring to the table, and so what is she really offering me?
I don't know I am not a doctor with the ability to diagnose you as a narcissist.
But it doesn't sound like it because you care about other people's feelings. So I don't don't think so.
And narcissists lack empathy. So it's not like they don't have empathy. They are not apathetic like a psychopath. They still have empathy, but they lack empathy. Lack of empathy and apathy are two different things.
Apathy is you don't care about anything at all. Like a psychopath. Lack of empathy can be caused by depression or feelings of sadness.
You're just overthinking stuff.
I may lack empathy then. Like when someone's hurt I find it hard to make them feel better. I force myself. I'm not depressed or sad though.
It could be due to social anhedonia. It could be autism not understanding how to communicate. It has multiple factors. Don't put a label on yourself. Especially an over used term like a narcissist. There are millions of people that use that word and they don't even know what it means.
Can't be any of those, I know how to communicate and I have friends