Since I have an access to his Instagram account, is it okay if I secretly remove his ex from his followers list?

Question

My guy gave me the access to his Instagram account. So now I can access his Instagram account on my phone. The thing is that i have suspicion that he still can't let go of his ex. They still follow each other on social media. And the ex still watches his story regularly.

He contacted his ex few months ago, and he made a story about wanting to create a charity work. Surprisingly, his ex replied to his story and wanted to join the charity work if he ever starts it. Now, my guy has the plan to start the charity work for himself. I suspect that he creates the charity work as an excuse to meet his ex and reconnect with her. Am i being paranoid?

My intuition has been telling me that he is still into her. Since i can access his Instagram account, is it okay to remove his ex from the follower list without telling him that i was the one to do it?

1073sucks · Accepted Answer

When it gets to that point and you can't get around it better end it and go fishing. if they are interested in each other, you're just gonna make yourself stressed/old/missearable trying to prevent, find and life your life that way until you eventually kill all or any emotions from him towards you and end the relationship in a horrible way. Either confront it directly and find out if he truly is interested in you, the person will either remove the other person themselves or they will make sure you KNOW you are the one they are interested in and nothing else to see there other than your paranoia. but if you go behind someone's back it will just become a pattern and you will see things are that are not actually there, and if they are in fact there then you doing all that won't matter because like I said if they ARE interested in each other, there is nothing you can do to stop it, even if you delete that now you will be snooping elsewhere to see if they are connecting and it will be a horrible miserable relationship until it isn't a relationship anymore because of all this.

EmyyWolf · Accepted Answer

No because the EX usually can have dirt about him. That you probably need to know about. Best to befriend the EX.

Be cunning and sneaky.

Ask the right questions. Stalk and research their past. Don’t block anyone in his name cause he will find out immediately.

Don’t matter if you block them or remove them from him. He knows their address. He can make a brand new account with ease on a public computer. It create a fake Bruner phone number if he really wanted to. And talk to any EX he want to.

If you do this. You’ll just look pathetic and insecure as hell. Now both of them are gonna have something to say about you.

YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO at least “ACT” LIKE you're ON A PEDESTAL, LIKE you're HIS, AND HE IS YOUR.

AT THE VERY LEAST ACT, DO SOME PROFESSIONAL ACTING.

Constatine · Accepted Answer

no!

you killed his trust in you.. I don't understand why you should have his log in... I still have contact with my ex.. not because I still love her or I can’t forget her. we have kids.

sorry to say but your relation is fucked up if he can trust you.. and doing things behind his back... and you don't trust him... that is is now with you and not his ex.

your young really young.. and I understand that it must be difficult for you him being connected with his ex but what would you think will happen if he found out what you did?

I know what I would do... I would never give you my login... and if I did.. and you delete my contacts / followers... your exit...

AviatorTom · Answer

No, it's not alright. He gave you access, not admin rights. What's wrong with him following his ex? They most likely had good times together.

Just because he follows another woman doesn't take anything away from your relationship.

You might try to be less controlling and more trusting and secure in your relationship with him. That he gave you his IG access sure means he trusts you, so return the favor.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Is it okay if he sneaks around and does things to you behind your back and without your permission?

ManOnFire · Answer

I think your gut instincts about him still being into her is probably right, but don't remove her from his followers list. He's going to know you did and it'll indicate to him that you're bothered by her enough to do it.

What I would do is talk to him about it. Ask him if he still likes her. You'll know by the way he answers and what he does if it's true or not. But honestly? I personally think you should get ready to let him go. No one wants to be in a relationship with someone who is still attached to their ex, even if they claim they aren't but you know better.

Uby10000 · Answer

You should speak about it first. Unfortunately, for as much jealous as you can be, it's still his phone. In the end, you both need to communicate this to each other. Tell him that following his ex hurts you in some way and that you'd like him to remove it. Explain to him that you may be paranoid but it makes you calmer this way. Some of us men will understand but some won't because in the end we are humans and sometimes detaching ourselves completely from something is impossible (I probably would remove it if i have gone away completely from it or if i got almost traumatized by my ex, but if we stayed in good terms I'd probably tell you what me and my ex are now, more in terms as friends or other stuff)

abc3643 · Answer

NO.

Let me put it to you this way:

If I was him and you do that, you BECOME the newest ex-. Permanently. And blocked.

Why such a drastic reaction?

Because I made needs to feel safe and secure and that he can trust his woman and that she is loyal.
By doing that, you instantly shatter that sense, and this instantly makes you worthless as a partner in life.
Furthermore, by doing that, you are illustrating your own immature insecurity and, worse, distrust in him. Again, that makes you worthless.

Radiate143 · Answer

The thing is that we had a fight a few months ago. During the fight, he tried to contact his ex on Instagram. And he wanted to get rid of me, and go back to his ex. He even admitted that the ex was better than me. He still has emotional attachment to his ex. Do i need to have a talk with him about it?

What was your question?

Joshydavid25 · Answer

I don't think that's the wisest idea and it won't help the relationship if you do that.. I would say simply talk to him about it and how it makes you feel uncomfortable and you guys can go from there. Plus he seems to still be on good terms with her, and unfriending her definitely wouldn't solve anything..

Anonymous · Answer

You don't have the right to do this. Also you know it won't be a secret because she will contact him and ask why he removed her and than he likely won't trust you anymore.

Also if he is there telling you his ex is better than you and even saying he will go back to her. That's your sign to end things.

Either trust him or move on

pianogirlmeow · Answer

Don’t do it, Bevause there’s no point, there’s nothing stopping him from following her again. It will only push you guys further apart, he will immediately know if was you who done it. I would never stay with a man i think is still interested in his ex. Tell him your concerns, no one needs to work with their ex whilst in a new relationship.

HelpfulWoman · Answer

fucking dodgy. Having access isn't the same as "hey babe yeah feel free to fuck around with my settings" Either get over it or dump him. Stop being a dumbass.

overthinkergirl · Answer

no that's not okay. If u want to remove his ex than ask him if he can do it but don't do it behind his back. if that followinf is bothering u just sit down and have a conversation.

Dinklex3 · Answer

No, it’s not. If he wants to meet and cheat with his ex, you secretly unfollowing her from instagram isn’t going to stop him.

MrKinktastic · Answer

It wouldn’t be ok since it’s being done sneakily/behind his back. That said, maybe have chat with him and see if he’s open to doing it himself.

spartan55 · Answer

Yeah, that sounds like a great idea. I'm sure he wouldn't figure out it was you either. You aren't mature enough to be in a relationship.

Mangospacho · Answer

You can remove her but it’s not going to change how he feels about her. If he’s really wanting to get back with her, he’s not going to just forget about her when he no longer sees her in his feed.

Sonjita · Answer

If you do it, it will only make you look bad and bring them closer together

Holsen · Answer

It’s up to you as the fact that he gave you access means that he believes in your decision!!

qqqqq0000 · Answer

Pretty sure he will just follow her again. Tell him to unfollow her because it makes you feel uncomfortable.

LazerBean · Answer

No, absolutely not. Either accept how he is or dump him. Don't be a child about it though

nawtee_me · Answer

He gave you his account info so you could see what he is up to, not to make his account your account. If it were me and you changed it without my ok, then you would be my next ex…

Since I have an access to his Instagram account, is it okay if I secretly remove his ex from his followers list?

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