Trauma sharing?

[Adonis1081]

Do you think that a person should share their childhood trauma like abusive parents, growing up in poverty or any other kinds of trauma to their partner? Also most people these days run from people who have experienced trauma of any kind. All people look for is good life and no one wants to share or acknowledge their trauma. Men too are afraid to share their trauma since that can be used against them!! What are your opinions about this! Also how do you know that your partner is a good person and will not traumatise you more. In the beginning whenever you share trauma with anyone be it friend family member or partner they act like they understand and are willing to help but when there’s downfall in life they just run away or laugh at you or worse use that to traumatise you more!!!

[IslaTheWitch]

Hidden trauma, which is not properly closed and treated, will probably be the reason for the abrupt end of the relationship.

Sharing (at some stage of the relationship) is better because the partner will know what to avoid. And probably can motivate the victim to take care of their mental health, and help find a specialist and support during the journey.

[Adonis1081]

Which stage is best for sharing such trauma? Beginning or after sometime in the middle of relationship? These kinds of trauma never properly heal and i used against the person may push the person towards suicidal thoughts. I have seen firsthand that people who showed their weaknesses to their partners suffered terrible fate. Only few have been lucky to have understanding partners. Also curious how to know that the partner will react positively to such grave information. Sometimes a person can be really nice to you but as you explain them your trauma they either become disinterested or become hostile towards you. Traumatised people find it hard to be in relationships in the first place. Respectfully do you think they will ever share their trauma?

[IslaTheWitch]

@Adonis1081
there is no one answer. People are different. There are pros and cons of hiding trauma. Unfortunately, hidden, not properly treated trauma always finishes with a broken relationship.

The first step should always be seeking professional help from the victim. Any trauma can be healed with proper help and an appropriate environment. And a will from the victim.

If sharing with a partner makes things worse, it means the victim seeks very specific partners (probably as a result of past experiences), and this also should be addressed by a specialist.

[Adonis1081]

Thanks @IslaTheWitch

[Joker_]

don't share your trauma with me pal