Hey ya’ll,
my fiance and i have been together for 7 years. We got engaged May of 2022. We both don’t make the best money to move in together in the area we live in. things are very expensive. anyway, my fiance is a huge social butterfly fly. he will and can talk to anyone and enjoys being around his friends. i on the other hand am a huge home body, don’t get me wrong i enjoy being social too, but not as much as him. anyway, since he enjoys being social, he will hangout with his friends more than he does with me. I say this because he will go hangout with them after work. Mind you, he will ask me to go hangout with him at his friends house and i say no. i used to love being social, but as of recently i closed off. I think im depressed or just got real anxious. anyway this weekend he went to his friends daughter birthday party, he invited me and i said no because i knew no one and i really didn’t want to be around people who were just going to get drunk. guess what, he got drunk too. he loves to drink, everyday he will drink a lot and i hate it. i want to have kids and him drinking so much probably has him low sperm count. anyway, i argued with him on Sunday because he chose to hangout with his friends than hangout with me. he says im making a big deal for no reason because it was just a little girls birthday and he invited me and i didn't go. I don't know if im being unreasonable to have him not go to a party because i want him all to myself or does he really choose his friends over me? please let me know. thank you
my fiance and i have been together for 7 years. We got engaged May of 2022. We both don’t make the best money to move in together in the area we live in. things are very expensive. anyway, my fiance is a huge social butterfly fly. he will and can talk to anyone and enjoys being around his friends. i on the other hand am a huge home body, don’t get me wrong i enjoy being social too, but not as much as him. anyway, since he enjoys being social, he will hangout with his friends more than he does with me. I say this because he will go hangout with them after work. Mind you, he will ask me to go hangout with him at his friends house and i say no. i used to love being social, but as of recently i closed off. I think im depressed or just got real anxious. anyway this weekend he went to his friends daughter birthday party, he invited me and i said no because i knew no one and i really didn’t want to be around people who were just going to get drunk. guess what, he got drunk too. he loves to drink, everyday he will drink a lot and i hate it. i want to have kids and him drinking so much probably has him low sperm count. anyway, i argued with him on Sunday because he chose to hangout with his friends than hangout with me. he says im making a big deal for no reason because it was just a little girls birthday and he invited me and i didn't go. I don't know if im being unreasonable to have him not go to a party because i want him all to myself or does he really choose his friends over me? please let me know. thank you
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This is so hard and more couples go through this and never share.
Right now your opposites!
It's something both of you have to work on and communicate!
Your not unreasonable! I'd agree with you about it all.
However he is seeing it more as he likes to party you hate to and want to ruin his drunk fun.
Instead of you want to spend time with him!
Poor thing probably not even had a date night in years!
I'd right now let him have low count if this is not fixed there won't be a wedding!
Living together breaks most couples up when something like this happens!
Good luck here is a big hug hope you two make it.
yes we both haven’t had one in a long time. when we hangout it’s always at his house. i’m convinced that he either is tired of arguing and me nagging that he doesn’t want to deal with it or he doesn’t respect me as his fiance and chooses his friends and drinking over me. i’m not saying he can’t have guy nights, but what i am saying is he doesn’t want to go out on dates with me he just only wants to hang out at his house or at his friends house.
You hit it right on the nose! He takes you for granted and just wants his friends right now!
Extra stress at work or just things so boring 😞. Sounds like he also might find sex a chore or your just baby focused. So not judging!
Well I hope he won't think your being baggy asking for a date night! You deserve one after all his partying!
Remind him your going to be his wife you need attention and love too not jus this drinking friends!
But he will get mad your not drinking... Cause drunks do!
Honestly this sounds like a addiction!
You expect us to believe that he got drunk at a little girls birthday party that the parents themselves were hosting for the family? Now I know you have a brain injury. You’re not qualified to teach logic to 6 year olds at an elementary school and you claim to be partner at a law farm.
You are being unreasonable. You can’t expect him to just stay at home with you allt he time. He’s an extrovert so he gains energy from being around people. He’s social and need that to feel good. You can’t control him in the way you want (him to just hang out with you at home most of the time). He invites you to join but you decline, so that’s on you. With that being said you need to meet in the middle. He has to be allowed to go out and hang out with people but he should also spend alone time with you regularly. To be honest though you two are not a match. If you ever have kids you’re going to end up divorced/seperated or constantly fight because this issue will remain and become an even bigger peoblem. You’re going to resent him for spending time with friends while you’re home alone with the kids and he’s going to feel like you’re trying to control him and like he’s stuck at home or else you’ll be pissed. Also, if he drinks a lot everyday that’s alcoholism and you should absolutely NOT have kids with him. You’re not only picking your coparent and lifepartner, you’re also picking your kids father. Do you really want to pick an alcoholic as your childs father? And a man who at the core is so different to you that you can’t even agree on basic things like how much time you should spend together and in what way? You shouldn’t want that.
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