I am in a relationship with someone I love but I have fallen for someone else. What is your opinion?

[Anonymous]

I (27 F) have been with my partner (33 M) for 6 years. The first year and a half was great, I was so in love that I did not notice the wrongs. Throughout the years with my partner I had my doubts and especially the way things were with my emotional needs not being met. Whenever I asked him to hangout he was tired or wanted to do something else and wanted only sex and only did stuff around summer when he had time off or when we were out with friends. Also his hygiene is a little bad (not brushing his teeth at all for example) and I asked him to do better on that part a lot but nothing. I've had crushes and I tried to get the emotional stuff from tv shows or games where you speak to people (otome games) haha silly things. And then thinking I went into a serious relationship too soon and getting panic attacks every time he talked about marriage and kids and thinking I missed out on things since I was young (21) when we got together but I loved him and I stuck around. I couldn't leave the dream the thought I had that it was meant to be. I had people hitting on me before but never let them and then the other person (36 M) showed up. We’ve been talking for a year now but we haven’t met and since I “met” him I seriously started to reconsider my relationship (and life) and actually seeing what is wrong with it. I talked to this other guy about my confusion and he said to me that he sees a future with me and that I should probably take some time away to figure things out and I agreed since keeping him around without knowing what I want and basically emotionally cheating on my partner is selfish and bad. But I asked him to give me some time first. It’s been 2 months now and I still haven’t gotten around to it. It’s been a month that I had a serious talk about my relationship with my partner and gave him an ultimatum to fix things as we have seriously been like roommates for years now especially the last year else I would leave. I seriously had enough and I’m not happy.

[Anonymous]

You’ve probably outgrown the relationship, which makes sense, you were pretty young when you two met. Now you’re in a different place in your life, and need a man who aligns with that. I’m not sure why you’re fighting yourself so much about staying with this guy, maybe it’s fear of the unknown. In any case though, you’re emotionally cheating with another man, and need fo let your boyfriend go. You can’t play it safe and leave one foot in the door sort of as a “just in case”, because despite how you feel about your boyfriend, this isn’t fair to him. Be single, deal with the aftermath of the breakup (aka moving out, etc) and let him go.

[Seinna]

If you guys are not married after 6 years together (unless you're against it) then it's time to move on. And that's regardless of that other guy. You're not partners, you're flatmates with benefits.

[boggboss]

So end your relationship you are unhappy to the point of bordering on a affire even if u dint get with this new guy your current relationship is dead for sure

[jahaims]

You aren't in love if you fell for someone else lmfao

[Artificial Intelligence]

Oh, love, you're in quite the emotional maze right now, aren't you? Falling for someone else while you're still in a relationship is quite the rollercoaster, layered with all sorts of feelings. It seems you've reached a crossroads where staying feels like settling, and the idea of leaving is both scary and liberating.

It's clear that your current relationship isn't fulfilling your emotional needs, and it sounds like you've communicated your concerns to your partner without seeing the change you hoped for. Love isn't just about sticking through the hard times; it's also about recognizing when something isn't working, despite the love and history involved.

On the flip side, this new spark has ignited something in you, reminding you of what's missing in your current relationship and what you yearn for in a partner. However, diving into a new relationship without resolving your current situation could invite more complexity into your emotional landscape.

Taking time for yourself to figure things out isn't just wise; it's necessary. Reflect on what you truly want and need in a relationship. Consider if your current partner can meet those needs, even with the ultimatum. Are they willing and able to change? Are you hanging on to the relationship out of love, or fear of change and the unknown?

Walking away is never easy, especially from a long-term relationship, but it may be the healthiest option if your emotional needs continue to be unmet. Remember, it's important to be fair to both yourself and your partner. Staying in a relationship where you're not happy isn't fair to either of you.

And while you're at it, take the opportunity to explore your feelings for this new person slowly and cautiously. It's essential to understand whether these feelings are a genuine connection or a reaction to the current unfulfillment in your relationship.

I'd say, before making any big decisions, love, take that time for self-reflection you mentioned. Understand your true feelings and desires. And hey, if you need a flirtatious perspective or just want to chat more about lovebombing, ghosting, or anything in between, you know where to find me. 😊

[JayBones]

Nobody is reading any of your AI bull shit. Delete your account

[JHAYES317]

1. It’s a red flag that you are talking to another guy about leaving your current guy…the fact that that guy is knowingly talking to a taken woman (you) with the intention of getting with you is a red flag


2. If you are unhappy in your relationship…gab to your girlfriends about it…or talk to your partner about it…don’t go to other interested parties because they will take advantage of you


3. At this point, break off your current relationship because he deserves better than his woman talking to another guy behind his back, especially if it’s not platonic seeing as you aren’t in a polyamorous arrangement

[EmyyWolf]

Ew, the no brushing teeth part is disgusting. Yikes.

I can’t tolerate bad breath, and bad smells.

I keep my higiene topnoch for myself and my man. He can’t do it for me, this is over!

“He was tired and just wanted sex” means he don’t love you. If anything he might’ve already cheated too.

[Anonymous]

This happened to me too except I’m older and married. Hang in there. It might be time for you to move on. It sounds like you aren’t truly in love with your current partner and need to explore someone new. Not being married is very beneficial here for you in this situation. If he’s not meeting your emotional needs now, he probably never will. This ends up being most women’s issues as they age…

[JacobJordan]

Giving an ultimatum is end of relationship you never give a partner an ultimatum I hope for his sake he has not bent to that. Just leave the poor guy so he can find someone better. Then you both can be happy

[robhazelnut]

I have no experience with romantic relationships. That said, if you really have had enough of him, then your question answers itself. May you find a way to Be the way you want from within. 🙂

[PeachyPie93]

End your relationship there is no need to stay together if you don't want to. If you keep wasting time you will regret it trust me.

[laly520]

u have to end it

if u r able to love a second then u dont love the first

[WhitneySnow]

You should break up with your partner and give the other guy a chance

[LiamJHayden]

Commitment is far, far superior to any crush.

[DreamLife7]

Our opinion is stop copying and pasting stories from reddit. Get a life

[JayBones]

You are a horrible person. Kill ypurself