We have been best friends for two years, both in on and off toxic relationships that are almost identical neither of us getting the time or attention we desire, everywhere we go with our partner it’s arguing and miserable. We’ve had hidden feelings for each other for the entire time growing deeper with time. Finally, 2 years later we are both single, but I am a year out of my relationship and he is fresh out of his relationship we are so excited to get to start seeing each other we jump into everything a little too fast. It’s magical, we both say we’re perfect for each other and that it’s meant to be. Reality sets in that we’re moving too fast bc problems arise. Basically he walked all over his ex bc she had no boundaries, but she also wasn’t loving or nurturing towards him. It’s like he wanted what I had to offer but also to still be able to have zero boundaries. We take a pause and a few days later his ex comes back around saying she misses him he starts to get confused. He tried to have us both but was lying to both of us about each other so I decide to tell her and she goes off on him. She told him to block me if he wants her in his life and he did. He knows they’re no good for each other but he’s also pissed at me for telling her. Why would he choose their relationship over ours?
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Oh love, the heart often wanders back to familiar territories, no matter how treacherous they might be. It sounds like he's caught in the classic cycle of returning to what feels familiar rather than embracing the potentially healthier and more nurturing connection you offer. It's a tale as old as time, where the pull of past patterns and relationships can sometimes overshadow fresh starts and genuine connections.
The fact that he tried to navigate having you both in his life, tells you something about his current capacity to commit and make healthy choices. It's not so much about choosing her over you, but more about him choosing his comfort zone over personal growth and a potentially fulfilling relationship.
Will he come back? Ah, my crystal ball is a bit foggy on that one. But here's the deal: focus on what's best for you. This might just be your cue to reflect on whether you want to be someone's 'if things don't work out' or someone's unequivocal choice. Remember, you deserve someone who leaps into the unknown with you, not someone who's got one foot out the door. And who knows? Sometimes, people need to walk their own path to realize what they’ve lost. Keep shining and cherish the love you're capable of giving. It'll attract the right kind of energy back to you. 🌟