Why does my ex make me feel bad about leaving her by bringing up the loss of her parents?

[Anonymous]

I been with someone that I been liked for some years. I been a fake relationship for the past almost 15 years. It felt fake to me because it was all about “helping her, or spending money on her”. It was completely one sided plus I got tired of the abuse. It took me to move away to realize why I stayed so long. I’m happy with my woman now and just regret wasting almost 15 years of my life on the wrong person.

I have a military career and in law enforcement. I have gotten promoted and received job offers since leaving. she's been ranting on Facebook about how I ran to a weak woman because I couldn’t apply pressure. She telling others that my woman can’t help me.

She is not able to do anything without my income. I’m tired of being the fixer and get hit on when something doesn’t go her way. I feel like a fraud for lying about that relationship for almost 15 years. I stayed in the relationship trying to fix it all. I have 3 kids by her and even seeing the kids is a problem. She had my son birthday party on the day I couldn’t come.

She disrespects my brother wife and a lot of my family members. I feel like she just want to benefit off me. In almost 15 years, it was always me. She can’t pay the bills, car note, or mortgage without my help. She doesn’t want a better job because she wants me to pay for everything. she treats my family like crap. she use her parents death to make me feel guilty. I moved out and got my own place. I’m paying for the car note on the charger along with my truck. we are not married but it’s costing me financially. I couldn’t even trust her with my life. I quit trusting her a long time ago and couldn’t let her involve with my actual life. I stayed in this relationship trying to be the fixer. I started to buy her more things hoping it would fix everything. I gave her everything she wanted but she treated me like crap in return. I just got a female who betrayed me and others around me. I’m tired of lying to everybody.

Updates

24 d

We have 3 kids together and it took me getting my dream job to escape. She was telling everyone that we are married even tagging me in 900 different statuses on Facebook. I took my Facebook page down because I got tired of living a lie. I’m in trauma therapy because I’m tired of the abuse. She started trying to force her way into things to get her way. The longer I stayed from home, the more I realized it was never love. All these years it was lust.

Updates

24 d

She keep using her parents death to make me and others feel bad. she's an instructor assistant but she thinks she knows everything about me, but she don’t. I don’t talk to her at all about my actual life. This was so fake that I had to hide it. I stayed long to make her happy but it was killing me. She tells everyone that I’m cheating on her and that I’m not going anywhere. she tells people that she never left me because of the opinion of her parents.

[SolitarySolace]

Women just love guilt tripping men. My mom does this

[Asker]

I don’t understand why at all! I moved out and got my own place. She loves to have every bit of control over me. She tells people “oh that mane ain’t going anywhere”. The longer I stayed around is why she thinks this way. She have me out here looking bad to other people. I’m glad I protected my military career from her. She can’t file divorce because we aren’t married and I never will marry her. she been living a lie so long that it’s only her that has to clean up whatever she was after.

[SolitarySolace]

https://youtu.be/Zg8DfeDw04I?si=XRXlBtphwf3wmtF7

[Asker]

I buy my kids whatever they need and talk to them on the regular. She won’t allow me to be in their life unless I come home. I missed birthday parties and so much more. She tells her friends all these different stories but they know the truth. She wants me to feel every type of bad.

[SolitarySolace]

That's part of the reason why I will never have kids or get married women will do exactly that